Friday 18 December 2015

A Study on War

War, war, war.  Joshua is about war.  It gets a little tiresome after awhile.  Then Joshua killed this king, then that king, fought here, fought there, laid siege, struck down, devoted to destruction.....pretty gruesome stuff actually.  I was having a hard time trying to draw any principles from the book as it just all seemed like a book on war! 

Finally, at the end of chapter 11, this phrase jumped out at me, "And the land had rest from war."  So, it doesnt go on forever.  There is an end!  That made me go back and think about those chapters a little differently.  Suddenly I once again realized how much it does relate to me.  I had just been reading it strictly from an Israelite perspective - trying to inherit the land.  But, as I read it from the perspective of a Christian family, at war with the nations of creditors, I realized how much it related to us once again.  We are trying to inherit the land as well - a debt-free land.

Chapter 10 has Joshua and his army literally go from one city to another, day after day, accomplishing unbelievable victories in what seems to be a short amount of time.  There is no talk of rest.  There is no talk of regrouping.  There is no mention of fatigue, discouragement, lack of resources.  They just go, go, go.  Because their reputation is becoming quite well known in the area, the local kings band together to fight against Israel.  Bad idea.  When God is the commander of the army you don't have a chance.  They lost big time.

I could almost picture all the banks and credit card companies catching on to what we are about.  "Do you realize this family is trying to get us out of their lives?  What can we do to make them stay in debt?  We've got to do something to make them spend more money!  If they pay off their debt, we're out of a job!  What if they try to influence other families to pay off debt!  This is serious!"  Just like the nations around Israel, the nations of creditors are probably panicking as many people are trying to do what we are doing - trying to get rid of debt once and for all.  The little description of the blog says, "We have declared war on debt."  I hadn't been reading Joshua at that time when I wrote that.  I seems so perfect now.

For Joshua, it was a series of battles, probably some bigger, some smaller, but he just didn't stop.  He and his army were machines.  They were relentless.  There is no talk of complaining despite the fact they must have been so tired. The only time they lost a battle was when someone got greedy, lost focus and coveted!  Oh, I covet all the time!  I must remember how that was the only battle where they lost! 

Reading about the battles now inspires me to continue on this path to victory - no rest, no time for complaining, no discouragement, no worrying about what I think is a lack of resources, full speed ahead because.......finally......there will be "rest from war."  Joshua didn't have to fight forever.  There was an end in sight!  One day, I'll actually put this blog to rest!  I will start another one on another topic because I won't be fighting debt forever.  There will be an end!

Let us be like Joshua and "strike with a sword".  He "laid siege and fought against it".  He "captured it and struck it".  He "left none remaining".  He "devoted to destruction".  He "struck the whole land".  There were never any survivors.  I want no remaining survivors either.  I don't want a single bit of debt remaining ever in my life...."no mercy".

Joshua ends up being the best book on fighting yet.  I left reading it more inspired than ever.  Last night we read a part of the advent story where the characters were in the wilderness and they came across a river after travelling long distances in the desert.  The camels were near death.  If they hadn't arrived at the oasis, they would have died.  Yes, they can go long distances without water for sure.  So can we as Christians. We can drink from the living water once in awhile and be seemingly completely fine.  The author said, "Wouldn't it be better to have a healthy drink of Jesus every day?"  I was "this close" to turning on the snooze button this morning.   "This close" to saying "I can get a drink another day."  There was no way I wanted to get up.  I would have missed this great lesson.  But I never would have known that I missed it, that's the sad part.  God wants to inspire me through His Word.  Sometimes I don't even realize what I am missing.  This time of daily studying has been so good.  I've learned so many lessons in this wilderness/desert.  I got my drink this morning.  So glad I didn't press the snooze button! 

Thursday 17 December 2015

Going Out On A Limb

We are in a place of dependency right now.  As my husband has looked for work this week, a few of the "regular" contracts he expected to get did not come through.  Some are just not making orders, some have budget issues and can't spend.  Our main hay customer isn't even buying as he's in the middle of a family crisis.  Fortunately we still have the courses that RM's been writing and he does have a course contract right now, so I praise God for that.  Perhaps that is our manna for the time being.  When I see it like that, I do not feel concern as I know God is going to give and provide just what we need when we need it.  And, each time that he came in this week to describe a different customer who had backed out, I was able to remind him of that.  Manna.  He'll give us manna.  He's taken away what we typically rely on so that we have only Him left.  Complete dependency.

If I was needing encouragement yesterday, I didn't realize it, until I found myself in the middle of a conversation with a new friend.  This young mom has a walk with the Lord that oozes out of her.  She shared a story of God's faithfulness to her and her husband in their finances this week.  I listened with great interest to hear how God had provided in the 11th hour.  Sounded familiar!

Then, she explained how she and her husband had recently gone out on a limb in faith.  I asked if I could share her story as it was so amazing.  She agreed.

Her husband had recently gotten a new job.  With the job came a vehicle which meant they could sell the one he used to drive.  "Perfect," they thought.  They were going to use the money from the sale of the car to pay down their credit card.  Moving forward financially is always a good thing, but then, a prompting....

She has a sister who is married with a young child.  This sister and her husband have only one vehicle.  Because of this she is unable to ever get out to do the things she needs to do like grocery shop or even just visit her mom or her sister until her husband gets home, which is apparently very late at night.  This had led to her feeling very isolated and overwhelmed.  But this sister and her husband are believers and they had begun to pray for a miracle vehicle, that God would just give them one!

Meanwhile, my friend and her husband did not know they were praying this way.  They just knew how she was feeling and wanted to help.  God put it on their hearts to give them their car, for free, no strings attached.  But then, a test.  When her husband got the new job, it was a higher paying job, but the first cheque was not what they had expected as more tax had been taken off.  She looked to her husband, afraid that he might want to back out on giving the car away and instead sell it as they had hoped for a bigger cheque.  "No," he said, "it doesn't change anything."  Whew!  They would still give the car away.

At the next visit with her sister and her husband, they handed over a small box with a key in it.  Her sister didn't understand at first.  They explained they were giving their car away, as a gift.  Both her sister and her husband were in tears.  They had just been talking and praying as they drove down that day about that very thing again - "Lord, give us a car!"  My friend's faithful step blessed her sister's faith and her husband's faith.  Never had they seen God work so specifically and so quickly.  They were also praying for a different job that didn't require such long hours for her husband.  I imagine this inspired them to keep praying and to know that God hears their prayers!  It gave us all chills to hear this amazing story. 

When another person heard of how this other family had been gifted a car, they just assumed it was a gift from her wealthier brother, "No," the new car owner explained, "it came from....." and mentioned the name of my friend and her husband.  This made no sense as they were not in a financial place that would make them able to just give away a car.  It couldn't be them!  It had to be from someone more able.  But it wasn't.  It came from someone who realistically shouldn't have been giving a car away! That's the beauty of this story, too.  God prompted them, they acted on it, many were blessed.
That is, I think, the greater, more meaningful part of the story.  Their faith inspired so many, to give when it makes no sense, to listen to God's prompting. 

It also reminded me what the family of God can do for one another and how God uses Christian families, both related biologically and spiritually.  Was it humbling to receive that gift of the car?  Yes, it probably was, perhaps moreso for the husband, but God used them to meet a need.  God could have sent a car from heaven, but He chose to use a family member to help them out.  That is hard for me!  I want to be able to say, "I can do it on my own.  We don't need help!"  Yet, God has used our families time and time again to help us.  I listened to her story knowing full well God had used her to bless her sister, so why then do I fight it when so clearly God has used my family to bless me?  Pride.  That's what it comes down to.  Pride.  I want no one to think we are in need.  Perhaps that is why God allowed me to hear that story last night.  It was a great reminder.

Flesh and blood.  God uses people with skin on to encourage us.  He comes down in just the form we need sometimes.  Yes, I get great encouragement from His Word, but Joshua and Moses aren't sitting beside me.  Last night, Joshua and Moses were there, talking to me, in person, through the form of my new friend.  I didn't even realize how much I needed that.  Thank you, new friend, for being just what I needed without even realizing it yourself!

Wednesday 16 December 2015

The Brink

Flies!

I will never complain about the weather being so warm in December, but I might complain about the flies that it brings!!!!  I cannot believe it, but I hung fly paper again yesterday and within minutes had caught at least 25 (I counted).  Yuck.  A small price to pay for warm weather, but it doesn't look like I'm going to get a break at all this year from flies as I feel spring is around the corner....with more flies!

Joshua - The Right Man for the Job

As I wrote a couple of days ago, I am now in Joshua, enjoying this book as much as all the others.  The "be strong and courageous" theme is just so great.  As the new job of leading the Israelites is thrust upon Joshua, no doubt he is a little unsure of himself, especially knowing the history of this rebellious group of people, but God anticipates this and has a plan.  He is going to "exalt" him "in the sight of Israel, that they may know" that God was "with Moses", so he "will be with you." (Josh 3:7)  He knew that they needed a little proof he was really the right man for the job.

Water......and more water....

It begins with the command to cross the Jordan.  It seems water is always involved!  It also seems like God uses the natural progression of going somewhere, in other words, regular life - going from A to B.  He just happens to make getting there pretty spectacular.  God makes sure that the ark goes ahead of everyone, "in order that you may know the way you shall go."  That reminds me of how important it is that I allow God to go ahead of me, that I follow Him, not moving ahead without guidance from His Word.  It also means God is going to work in my regular goings on - getting from A to B.

The Brink

The priests are then told to go to the "brink of the waters of the Jordan".  That phrase jumped out at me..."the brink".  I asked the kids to finish the phrase.  I said, "Today we are on the brink of....." and they yelled out "Disaster!"  Isn't that usually how you see "the brink"?  But not with God.  He takes us to the brink and it is the brink of a miracle.  Of course.  God wouldn't do it any other way, but to turn disaster on its head.  Love that.

So the priests are to go to "the brink" and then "stand still in the Jordan".  Again,  you would expect them to have to do something to make the miracle occur, but they are only to stand still.  It also goes against everything in us.  I have been watching my husband this week look for work.  He isn't "standing still".  That wouldn't make any sense at all!  But in this case, they are told to stand still, not actively work at making a miracle.

Extra Words

Then Joshua tells them ahead of time what will happen.  He uses phrases that, I imagine, would be such an encouragement to the people,

"Here is how you shall know that the living God is among you and that He will without fail drive out from before you the Cannanites, the Hittites, the Hivites, the Perizzites, the Girgashites, the Amorites, and the Jebusites....And when the soles of the feet of the priests bearing the ark of the Lord, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan shall be cut off from flowing, and the waters coming down form above shall stand in one heap." (Josh. 3:10-13)

I asked the kids to point out what they thought were the extra words.  Words that didn't have to be added, but were added very intentionally.  They saw them right away...."living God".  Not just "God", but "living"!  He isn't made of stone, like the gods of the nations around them.  He is described as "living"!  The next one?  "Without fail".  Not only will He drive out the nations before them, but He will do this "without fail".  I would and I do need to hear that.  I still have those nations in front of me.  They don't seem to be moving.  But to hear He will do this "without fail" is such an encouragement to me.  Then, the Lord "of all the earth".  Not only is He Lord, but He is Lord "of all the earth."  The Israelites probably needed to hear that one, too.  I'm sure the Jordan was no small river and to look at it and think, "We're going to cross that?"  But if they knew He was Lord "of all the earth", they might not be so afraid.  He made it, He can handle it.  These were all small, barely noticeable phrases that could have been left out, the meaning wouldn't have changed at all, but God allowed them to be put in. 

Back to the Brink

Then, back to "the brink".  The priests dipped their feet in the water.  That was it.  That was their part of the miracle, to move forward into a rushing river that was currently overflowing its banks.  It could have even appeared foolish or dangerous to an outsider to do that simple action.  But they had faith in what Joshua had asked them to do.  Suddenly their feet were on "dry ground in the midst of the Jordan and all Israel was passing over on dry ground until all the nation finished passing over the Jordan." (Josh. 3:177)  Turns out they weren't on the brink of disaster at all, but the brink of a miracle.  That's the kind of brink I want to be on!

In Haste

My favourite verse in the story was in chapter 4:10, "The people passed over in haste."  I'm sure they did!  I'm sure they saw the water piled up "in a heap very far away", but they probably wondered how long it would stay that way!  I'm sure they wanted to get away from that water as fast as they could, miracle or no miracle!  It would be scary to be in the middle of dry river bed knowing at any moment God could just let the water rush all over them.  They knew they weren't very deserving of yet another miracle.  But that is the Lord's mercy on them.  He was doing it for Joshua's sake, not their's.  "On that day the Lord exalted Joshua in the sight of all Israel, and they stood in awe of him just as they had stood in awe of Moses, all the days of his life." (Josh.4:14)  We often think this.  We are so underserving, yet He cares for us.  It isn't for our glory, but His.

Right now, it does kind of feel like we are on the brink of something.  I don't know what it is.  I sure hope it isn't disaster.  I would much prefer a miracle!  After the miracle, God says to Joshua, "Today I have rolled away the reproach of Egypt from you."  (Josh 5:9) I also long for that.  The freedom from debt takes away "the reproach of Egypt."  We long for that.

No More Manna!

In the meantime, we are daily being provided for.  It's interesting to notice that after they landed in the Promised Land they ate "of the produce of the land."  "And the manna ceased the day after they ate of the produce of the land.  And there was no longer manna for the people of Israel, but they ate of the fruit of the land of Canaan that year." (Josh. 5:12)  God has done that for us.  When all of our older children were in braces, we had just enough to cover all their expenses.  When they were out of the braces, the extra money was no longer there!  As long as we have expenses, I know God will provide...somehow.   We always tell the kids, "You've never missed a meal."  And they haven't.  There has always been manna in some form.

Recognizing God

Finally, the chapter ends with Joshua looking up and seeing a man, "standing before him with his drawn sword in his hand."  He didn't know it was the "Commander of the army of the Lord".  "Now I have come," He said.  Joshua didn't recognize Him.  For all he knew He was an adversary.  "Are you for us, or for our adversaries?" (Josh 5:13)  That is how it appears sometimes.  It seems like God is an adversary, not fighting for us.  I suppose it is because we don't recognize Him.  We don't know His ways, but there He was "with His drawn sword."  I'm asking for the Lord to come and fight for us, too.  I know He is already.  I just need my eyes to be opened to see the commander of the Lord.  I think sometimes He is disguised and I don't recognize that He is already working, fighting, with His drawn sword.  Joshua was told to "Take off" his sandals, "for the place where you are standing is holy."  Where God is working it is considered holy ground.  I must have that perspective, too.  I need to see that situations that don't make sense doesn't mean that God isn't there - quite the opposite.  I just don't recognize Him.  I need to realize I am on holy ground regardless of whether or not I see "signs" of His presence.  If I had that perspective I would be much slower to complain.

We do find ourselves, as I said, on the brink of something.  In our human perspective it doesn't seem like it is quite the same brink as the Israelites.  Work is slow right now.  No man ever likes it when work is slow.  We're taking this as a time to rethink how we do things, how we look for work, where we look for work, what kind of new work we should be looking for.  We are asking that our eyes be opened to new opportunities or that the Lord would bless the old opportunities, whatever He wants to do.  The rushing waters of the Jordan are ahead of us.  We are ready to jump in or dip our feet in or swim or dive or whatever He wants us to do!  We'll do whatever He wants!  We know the "hand of the Lord is mighty." 

Monday 14 December 2015

Monday

Christmas cookie decorating, Christmas pageants, Christmas messages at church - makes for a fun time of year.  Memories are being made without spending a lot of money which is always good!

I was woken up earlier than usual again this morning.  I don't fight it.  I figure I'm supposed to get up.  If I lay in bed, then lists start in my mind and keep me from sleeping anyway. 

As I finished up Deuteronomy today I read about the transition from Moses to Joshua.  Many times he tells Joshua, "Be strong and courageous."  "Do not fear or be in dread."  "It is the Lord your God who goes with you.  He will not leave you or forsake you."  "Do not fear or be dismayed."  These are all phrases that will help me get through any anxiety that, no doubt, will try to get at me this week.

At church on Sunday I was reminded that part of the curse is that there is "enmity between your offspring and her offspring."  Quite simply, Satan will always be at work trying to redirect my thoughts away from God, either through questioning His faithfulness, His promises, His love, or even by making me fearful.  The pastor mentioned how as human beings, we make promises, but we just aren't that good at keeping them.  God, however, is faithful to His promises, so we can fully trust Him, no matter what.  So, if God say, "Do not fear", I don't have to be afraid.  That's that.

One tradition that we started a few years ago was to go through a book at advent that tells the story of Christmas through the eyes of a child that was there at the time of Christ's birth.  This year it is through the perspective of one of the wise men's children.  The children absolutely love this and are getting so much out of it, not to mention RM and me.  There are parts where you laugh out loud, other times, it can actually bring a tear to your eye.  Every child is engaged.

Sometimes you shake your head at what you find yourself having to deal with unexpectedly.  This week, it's yet another cat incident.  I can hardly believe it, but our biggest cat who gets in a lot of fights came back limping so badly this week that we've let him stay indoors to recover.  There is no obvious marks.  We don't know what happened.  It sure draws out all the animal lovers in the house which is actually kind of sweet the way they all dote on this fuzzy animal.  We've found ourselves praying for this kitty.  I'm sure he will make a full recovery.  They always seem to.  This is certainly when we wish our son was a qualified vet!  His time at the co-op last year has come in handy though.  This kind of drama I can handle.

Well, my thoughts are a little all over the place today......I enter into this week knowing my ways are in His capable hands.

Friday 11 December 2015

Choose Life

"Choose life."  This is a phrase I say all the time to the kids.  I thought I had gotten it from a parenting book by Ted Tripp called "Shepherding a Child's Heart".  He speaks about how when we are disciplining our children it is actually rescuing them from a bad life and that it is my job to do this.  The children are therefore supposed to choose life so that I don't have to always discipline them.  They should be learning from the discipline.

But then, I read today in Deuteronomy,

"See, I have set before you today life and good, death and evil....Therefore CHOOSE LIFE..." (Deut. 30:19)

Turns out, it wasn't Ted who came up with the phrase, but God!

My kids have to choose life.  I have to choose life. 

But my kids will say, "It's too hard!"  or I will say, "This is too much for me!"

But Moses records the words of the Lord in response to this pathetic plea, "For this commandment that I command you today is not too hard for you, neither is it far off.  It is not in heaven...neither is it beyond the sea....but the word is very near you.  It is in your mouth and in your heart so that you can do it."  (Deut. 30:30:11-14)

I love that.  My kids don't get to use any excuses and neither do I.  What God requires of me is simply not too hard for me.  I have everything I need at my disposal to accomplish what He wants me to do, on a daily basis.  I don't need to go to heaven for special help or across the sea to get what I need.  Everything I need is inside me, figuratively anyway!  I simply have to choose life.

As we continue on this journey, we continue to have little reminders of God's blessing on our life.  Recently my daughter stopped for fast food as she'd been at a job and hadn't eaten in hours and was starting to feel like she was going to be sick to her stomach if she waited to eat at home.  She pulled into a Mcdonalds and ordered her food.  When she got to the window, they said, "It's on the house."  What?!  "It's on the house," they repeated.  She drove away in absolute shock.  She was so excited to tell us the next morning (as we were all fast asleep when she got home that night).  God extended that small blessing to her, in such a practical way, that met her right where she was at.  It blessed me to hear her story.  We were all in awe.

Then, another small miracle happened this week with our bank.  We were charged a fee we were not happy about.  Isn't that what banks do?  Charge fees?  Of course, who are we to make a stink about a fee?  But RM called anyway and explained that he wasn't too happy about this particular fee for a variety of reasons, never expecting them to do anything about it, but for some reason they listened to him and said they would get back to him by the end of the day if there was something they could do about it.  Shockingly, at the end of the day, they called to say they had reversed the charge.  I was there when he took the call, "What?!  he said out loud.  "I can't believe it!  Thank you so much!"  Very unbank-like, wouldn't you say?  It was a small thing, but once again...God's goodness to us we felt...another little nation...little by little......

While I'm on the topic of making a stink....We even had an answer to prayer with our septic system. :) We were pretty sure that it was on its way out.  This week we called in a guy to pump out our uh, waste.  The average house needs to call him in every 3 years.  With us, as there are so many of us, it turns out we need to bring a guy in a lot more often.  It might be as simple as that.  By simply pumping it out more often our septic bed should be fine, Lord willing.  This could be another miracle as replacing a septic system is thousands of dollars.  We trust God even with a stinky situation like this!

I think that is how you choose life, by trusting God, from the big things to the small things, to even the stinky things. The last part of the "Choose Life" verse is perfect, "Therefore, choose life that you and your offspring might live, loving the Lord your God, obeying His voice, and holding fast to Him, for He is your life and length of days..." (Deut. 30:19

As I choose life, I live!  As I choose life and hold fast to Him, I find out He is my life!  He makes sense of my life!  My length of days has meaning!  It all ties together.

Thursday 10 December 2015

The Fear Tests

Two things happened early on in our marriage that I realize have affected me for years.  It's silly really, but Satan has used them to create fear in me all this time.  It was only yesterday that I realized this, because of what I had written about, having no fear, no panic, no dread, and that I must conquer these fears once and for all.

A looooong time ago, when we only had one child, we were looking to put in an apartment suite in our home so that we could rent out part of our home for some extra income (it was a good-sized house).  We were living in a part of town where you just didn't do these sorts of things. It was highly looked down upon and we didn't realize it at the time, but it was creating a slow burn in our neighbours as I guess they were viewing us as "bringing down the neighbourhood". 

Sure enough, they called the "by-law enforcement" officers and reported on us, sure that we were doing something we weren't allowed to do.  Turns out, we were completely within our rights to do what we were doing as long as we made a few adjustments to keep it within the by-laws, which we did right away.  I'm sure the neighbours weren't happy about that, but oh well.  We didn't stick around that part of town much longer, needless to say.

However, that was the beginning of fear #1 - I have always felt a twinge of, let's say, concern....when it comes to the city or town authorities since then and their silly little vehicles.  Even if we aren't guilty of anything!  That's ridiculous!  Just because of that one time......ages ago.  This week, a city truck drove into our driveway to ask a simple question about where we were thinking of putting some solar panels, but at first, I assumed we were in trouble!  Satan loves to have my stomach in knots and will do whatever it takes to make me feel anxious.  I hadn't studied that passage I wrote about yesterday, so fear gripped me, even though there was no reason for fear!  It was a nation God wanted me to possess and yet I couldn't because I was "fearful and fainthearted".  The man left, nothing had happened.  All my concerns were completely pointless and misguided.

The other silly thing was also early on, when we had only 2 or 3 children.  One time I told my husband I was going grocery shopping and I checked to make sure there was money in the bank.  We were good.  But when I went to pay, the machine said "declined".  I was mortified.  There was money in the bank, but of course, they just assume you are trying to cover up.  Some mistake was made or some cheque was held, I can't remember what it was, but since then, I often feel afraid when I get to the cashier, even if I know 100% that there is money in the bank.  That's how fear works - it makes you irrational.

But yesterday was different.  I went grocery shopping.  It was a big shop.  I had once again checked in with my husband and he said we were good.  But as I shopped and started stocking up on lots of big ticket items, fear started to eat at me - what if I'm buying too much?  What if a mistake was made at the bank?  Perhaps I shouldn't buy so much.  It was a big cart full by the time I was done.  I had a huge knot in my stomach which I have felt before, but hadn't recognized it at as something I could deal with. 

The moment of truth.  I stood at the cashier - it was a big bill.  Suddenly I remembered what I had written about just that morning and realized I was afraid, dreading and possibly even slightly panicking - once again, for no reason.  I started to say to myself, "No fear, no panic, no dread."  I repeated it in my mind because I knew I needed to stop this terrible pattern of thinking.  I saw it for what it was for the first time - it was truly a spiritual battle.  A nation was in front of me, could I take this one?  Could God help me get victory in this area?  As I thought through it, right there, in the aisle, on the spot, I worked through it.  I asked myself, "What is the worst thing that could happen?"  I knew I could handle it!  It wouldn't be the end of the world!  No problem - I was approved and scooted out to do a few more errands with the same calmness that had suddenly come over me.  Victory.   

I do not need to be afraid.  I think that really was another nation for me.  I realized that if I am "fearful" or "fainthearted" I better just drop out of the game.  The Bible says, "lest he make the heart of his fellows melt like his own." (Deut. 20:8)  If I am afraid, it makes my husband afraid, my children afraid...we all affect one another.  If I am confident in the Lord and show my trust in Him, then they trust in Him, too. 

I think when we think of fear, we think of big things like, I don't know, fear of an earthquake, or something huge like that, but that is too obvious.  Satan will try to paralyze us with the little fears or for me, a strange pattern of thinking that was based on something seemingly unimportant, a little incident that became a foothold for me for a long time ago.  We need to ask God to reveal to us what those footholds are so that we can conquer them one at a time.  It's a victory God wants us to win.  I can see now why He would tell the fearful and fainthearted to turn back.  You're really good for nothing in His army if you are stuck in that way of thinking.  He needs people who trust in Him - 100%.  In the big things for sure, but more importantly, in the small things.

Wednesday 9 December 2015

No Fear, No Panic, No Dread

The reason I think a lot of people don't read or understand the New Testament is because it seems to be about things that have nothing to do with us today.  For example, there are so many different laws to follow about finding someone's ox or donkey gone astray, that it really doesn't seem to relate to most people (though, oddly, we can relate!)  So how do you read it then? 

I believe we are supposed to look for general principles that can be drawn out of these types of passages.  I was joking with my husband yesterday that we need "cities of refuge" for our children.  In Deuteronomy these are cities that a person can run to if they accidently murder someone so that they can be protected from the avenger.  Murder doesn't happen every day in our home, though they do "murder" with their words sometimes, but someone nearly always gets hurt "accidently" by a brother or a sister and boy oh boy, do they ever run to one of us for protection from the avenger!  I said, "We need cities of refuge for our kids!"  (One 5 year old in particular, that is....)  Though, I hardly think he does it by accident, most of the time....so perhaps a bedroom of refuge or a dad's office of refuge......

I'm joking of course, but as I read, for example, "Laws Concerning Warfare" in Deuteronomy chapter 20,  I realize most of us won't be going to war in the next day or two, but then again, aren't we?  I go to war daily!  I go to war against my flesh.  I go to war against our debt.  I go to war against Satan who wants me to daily lose it on my kids!  I go to war against wrong emotions......and so on and so on......As I read the passage then, all of a sudden, it comes to life!  Now I'm reading it as a wife and mother and I start to picture all the wars I'm in.

Chapter 20 begins like this,

"When you go out to war against your enemies, and see horses and chariots and an army larger than your own, you shall not be afraid of them for the Lord your God is with you, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt.  And when you draw near to the battle, the priest shall come forward and speak to the people and shall say to them, 'Hear, O Israel, today you are drawing near for the battle against your enemies:  let not your heart faint,.  Do not fear or panic or be in dread of them, for the Lord your God is He who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies, to give you the victory.'"

Immediately I underlined the whole passage and double-underlined the words, DO NOT FEAR OR PANIC OR BE IN DREAD OF THEM!   Why?  Because that is often what I feel when I'm about to do battle.

My husband is working on a project right now.  He's really excited about it, but my initial reaction is to wonder how things will go.  So immediately I insert the phrase from the Bible, "No fear, no panic, no dread."  Suddenly my perspective changes and I can be excited with him!

One of my kids is showing signs on and off that she might be struggling with similar symptoms that my other daughter had - could she have leaky gut as well or is it just regular childhood stuff?  At first, there's so much, "what if, what if, what if....?"  But then, "No fear, no panic, no dread."  Then, I just take each symptom, try a different diet for a bit, see if it works, no problem.....

My boys are starting to seriously think about careers.  Will they need to go to university?  How will I get them in?  Anxiety wells up, but then, "No fear, no panic, no dread....."  I realize I can cross each bridge as I get to in....calmness comes over me.

What about the fact there is no obvious signs of work coming in?  How will we conquer this army that is definitely "larger than my own"?  "No fear, no panic, no dread." 

So that is how I read the Old Testament.  Then I get so much out of it!  There are over-arching principles all throughout and it is up to the Holy Spirit to draw them out as I read them, as I mine the Scriptures. 

As that passage goes on, there is more.  Officers are supposed to speak to the people giving a little pep talk, challenging them, "Is there any man who is fearful or fainthearted?  Let him go back to his house, lest he make the heart of his fellows melt like his own."  The principle there?  I am supposed to be like an officer.  I do this all the time.  I gather the kids around me and I give them a pep talk just about every day, "Ok guys, we can do this!  We're going to take on our messy house!  We're going to take on this debt-battle!  We're going to clothe ourselves in brotherly kindness!  If any of you aren't on board, go back to bed!  I need kids who are going to stand with me!  Let's go go go go go!!!!!"

I'm really not exaggerating.  If I had a mega-phone it would add to the effect, but since I don't, I use my best "officer" voice and add a bit of "cheerleader" antics, sometimes some crazy music (as I don't have a lute or a lyre) and off we go, to take on the laundry, or the schoolwork or whatever it is and I really leave the ones who aren't on board in the dust.  Eventually they see they are bringing others down with them, so they end up joining the rest of us as I don't tolerate the bad attitude too well.  I love that the Bible says, "Go back."  That's why I say, too. "Go back - to bed, to your room, far from here as you are bringing the rest down."

The Bible is rich, so full of fantastic teaching.  I love how it can apply to me and my exact situation despite the fact is was written so long ago.  The people of that time had to deal with the same things I'm dealing with.

One of my kids started throwing up yesterday...another potential battle ahead.  Will it go through the whole house?  Will it stop at him?  Will I be up all night?  No fear, no panic, no dread.  I can deal with it.  I'll get through it.  What's the worst thing that can happen, more laundry?  So, once again, I thank God for the Scripture that was written so long ago....for me.  I can get through another battle, another army that is bigger than me. 



Tuesday 8 December 2015

An Easy Thing.....and Cats....ugh

I love the dramatic.  We've had our share of it, amazing answers to prayer at the last minute, neat stories of God's providence that defy explanation, but I read something yesterday that made me realize I cannot depend on drama.  True faith will stand firm, even without any signs or wonders.

2 Kings 3:17-18 was the devotional's verse yesterday,

"You will see neither wind nor rain, yet this valley will be filled with water, and you, your cattle and your other animals will drink.  This is an easy thing in he eyes of the Lord; He will also hand Moab over to you."

How can a valley be filled without rain?  One would normally expect God to do something like that in a way that could be observed, but in this case, He does it without wind or rain "without any sound or sign and from sources invisible and seemingly impossible" wrote A. B. Simpson.  I often pray that God will show Himself to me, that I will know He is there, but Simpson writes, "But the greatest triumph of a person's faith is to 'be still, and know that He is God'" (Ps. 46:10).  Just know.  Not have to always have proof.

In 2 Kings it says, "This is an easy thing in the eyes of the Lord."  It is impossible in my eyes.  If it were something I could do, than I would take all the credit.  It has to be impossible. 

Some days God gives me great signs and wonders, other days there is no obvious sign that He is working at all.  But I must continue to trust that He is up to something for my good.  Walking by faith...not by sight.

Switching gears....into feline territory.  I'm trying to decide if I love or hate cats.  Right now, it is not love.  I'm a cat person, as opposed to say, a dog person, but this week has been a test.  I have found "evidence" that they are not using their litter box or going outside.  Instead I have located this evidence in secret places in my house, which explains certain smells.  One cat is neutered, the other boys are not and I'm thinking of doing it myself that's how frustrated I am.  Usually their "work" goes on a night, so we've been sending them out to sleep in the barn at night, but last night, we hadn't sent them out yet and I innocently walked into the bathroom with my 3 year old only to step right in a huge pile of you-guess-it....cat droppings.  I can't even write the word.  I yelled so loudly that my husband came running to see if I was ok!  All cats were located and immediately thrown out after severe questioning to find out which one it was.....funny, the cat had their tongue.....no one would talk.

It seems slightly humourous this morning, but last night I was sure I had changed from being a cat lover to uh, not.  Does everyone have to walk around their house in fear that they might step in something?  Once again, the "fun" side of farm life as we certainly never had cats in town.  Now we have 5.  Well, I'm sure there are worse things in life.  Looking before stepping....got it.

Monday 7 December 2015

The Lord's Release

Lego isn't just a simple toy anymore.  You can also build robots with it and enter competitions where the robot has to accomplish "missions"!  That's what 3 of my children were doing this weekend and they picked up 3rd place out of about 20 teams!  They would argue they should have come in 2nd, but there was some technicality that eliminated them from going on to the provincials.  They were so disappointed!  Another great life lesson though - how to lose graciously, even though, in my opinion they hardly lost!

Still in Deuteronomy...I've read this verse before in the Maxwell's book Buying a House Debt-Free, but I've never read it in the actual context.  Moses is talking about the "Sabbatical Year", which I feel we might be in (depending on how you calculate it.....).  He makes some remarkable statements, which I'll write out, but first what always strikes me is the condition, "....if only you will strictly obey the voice of the Lord your God, being careful to do all this commandment that I command you today."  God wants us to strictly obey.  I don't think that is legalism.  I think that is wisdom!  It is a very hard thing to do, but that is just because we are so prone to wander.  But when I read the other part of the verse, it is a very good motivator,

"For the Lord your God will bless you, as He promised you, and you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow, and you shall rule over many nations, but they shall not rule over you." (Deut. 15:6)

The comparison is clear - those who borrow are not seen as a strong nation, but a weak one, one that is ruled over (like being owned by a bank).  How clear that is to us!  We do not feel strong at all in this situation.  The bank rules over us.  I would much rather be in the driver's seat, so to speak, able to lend, not borrow, able to rule, not be ruled over.

The chapter that includes that verse begins with the description of the Sabbatical Year.  The seventh year is a beautiful picture of freedom, "At the end of every seven years you shall grant a release.  And this is the manner of the release:  every creditor shall release what he has lent to his neighbour.  He shall not exact it of his neighbour, his brother because the Lord's release has been proclaimed." (Deut. 15:1,2)

The Lord's release has been proclaimed!  I should really run this verse down to the bank and show it to them.  I don't think they know it!  But even if I did, I think they would look at me with a strange expression and quietly call security.  So, instead, I thank God for showing it to me.  I ask Him to help us follow His way with our money, as strictly as we know how, and I trust Him for His release, when He so chooses. 

Friday 4 December 2015

Bank, Fridge, Heart

I shared with RM yesterday all that I was learning and reading, but I have to admit at the end of it all I told him, "This is a lonely road."  He stopped me almost right away as I was about to start complaining again.  He wouldn't let me continue.  He wanted my attitude to change, to stay positive, to not fall into that trap of "woe is me".  He was right.  I was glad he didn't join me in my pity party and that he called me out on it.

Knowing that, I continued my day with a better attitude.  Then, kind of out of the blue, he said, "Oh, I forgot to tell you I got this strange email this morning."  He went on to explain how our oil supplier (to heat our house) had sent an invoice, but had included interest on it.  RM couldn't understand why we were being charged interest and so he called them.  They said it was because we were overdue and that they had sent all sorts of emails reminding us of this.  We hadn't received any emails, so RM asked them to check what email they were sending it to and discovered they had made a typo which explained why we didn't get any of them.  Hmmm....would we be still charged all this extra money?  They said they would look into it.  We hoped they would reduce our bill at least by a little.

Then, they sent an email saying the unthinkable, "$0.00 due".  They weren't going to charge us anything!  We couldn't believe it.  Who sends an invoice saying you owe nothing?  That just never happens.  I said to him, "That's our first nation!  Done!"  Actually, it was just a regular bill, but it was as if it was a small village that God had just given us to possess.  We had done nothing except to try to do the right thing and pay our debt and God had given us the village.

Later on, for lunch and part of the afternoon, my mom came by.  It was like a visit from God with flesh on.  We sat together after lunch just sharing with each other all that God was teaching both of us.  She brought our her book on the Psalms.  We discussed the many hard lessons I was learning.  She listened.  I was encouraged by her.  I don't know if the kids knew I needed that time, but they were out of the room the whole time and I just soaked it all in.  I love you, Mom!!

While she was there, RM walked in again and said, "You'll never believe this...."  He had called one of his suppliers who is always late in sending an invoice and said, "You have to tell me what I owe you if you want to get paid!"  He didn't want to make that call.  He probably hoped he'd never get an invoice, but he knew he had to call.  The supplier sent an email later, "It's on the house."  For the second time, in a matter of hours, we'd had a bill paid-in-full BY THE OTHER GUY!!!!!  WHAT?!  Another nation!?  In just a matter of hours!  It couldn't be possible.  Yet, God gave us another nation to possess, or a village, I suppose as it wasn't a big bill either, but nevertheless, we did NOTHING to get that kind of treatment - nothing.  Only God could move in these people's hearts as we hadn't asked for the favour.

To top it all off, I got a few groceries, courtesy of Mom.  As I drove the 5 minutes home from the grocery store, it just so happened that I heard a 2 minute snippet of a financial radio program.  The man on the program talked about debt and how for so many people their debt is so consuming, so overwhelming, greater than any income they have and seemingly impossible to pay off.  But then, he said, "However, when they decide to start doing things God's way, all of a sudden they find little miracles start to happen...extra money comes in unexpectedly, or a gift shows up unannounced or they're able to make extra money they didn't expect."  Then he explained how God did this all throughout the Bible, providing manna when the Israelites didn't expect it or know where their next meal would come.  Jesus fed 4000 with just a few loaves and fish.  The widow was able to pay off all her debts with jars of oil miraculously filled.  So many examples of miraculous provision. 

I'm rarely in the car and it was literally two minutes that I just "so happened" to be able to hear.    This is certainly not to pat ourselves on the back and to suggest we are doing it "God's way".  Oh no, we are just like those Israelites, sinful, full of wickedness, rebellious.....but we long to do the right thing and once in awhile, in our discouragement, God allows these little miracles, as "signs and wonders, the mighty hand, and the outstretched arm" just to keep us on track, to encourage us, to remind us we can do this, so that we don't get afraid or full of dread.

Just this week I had written about taking down our "nations".  God allowed us to take down a couple of villages this week.  But isn't that just what I read this week, "little by little"?  We did nothing except to make contact with them, telling them we wanted to pay them!  It was amazing to hear both times - no payment required.  That can only be God.

Yesterday as my mom left, I was left behind with not only our fridge full, but my heart as well.  God had done miracles that day for RM, financial ones, but in His kindness, He had filled my spiritual, emotional need as well with a "rich" time with my mom.  Talk about covering all the bases!  As Mom witnessed these miracles we talked about how God is simply a God of love.  I had just read that, "Yet the Lord set His heart in love to love on your fathers......"  (Deut 10:15).  And, just to make sure I start thinking it is because of something I've done, He says, "Do not say in your heart....'It is because of my righteousness that the Lord has brought me in to possess this land.'....Not because of your righteousness or the uprightness of your heart are you going in to possess their land....for you are a stubborn people...."  (Deut. 9:4, 6)  Nope, it's just because He is a God of love and mercy, "For the Lord your God is a merciful God." (Deut. 4:31)  Message received.




Thursday 3 December 2015

Early Morning Bible Study with God


Once in a while I get woken up in the middle of the night and no matter what I do, I cannot get back to sleep, especially if it is close to when I'm going to get up anyway.  Yesterday, I stopped fighting it at and came down at the ridiculous hour of 4 am.
I can only think I was woken up for a reason as I ended up reading some verses in Deuteronomy that seemed written just for me.  Perhaps God knew I needed some encouragement once again on this path.
It started with the Ten Commandments.  My thoughts always get so confused this time of year.  Christmas will always be a struggle for me I think.  No matter that we are on a debt-elimination plan...I don't care!  I just want to spend, spend, spend!!!!  I want to throw all rules out the window and just do whatever I want!  I'll figure out how to make it up in January.  This was my pattern for years.  This is my flesh speaking, of course.  It gets harder whenever I'm near anyone who doesn't have the same convictions (as not everyone has to do things the same way we are) or who just seems to be able to lavish gifts on their children without any impact (that I can see anyway) on their financial situation.  I'm so weak!!!!  My husband just wants to put me in a closet this time of year and bring me out in January as I share my pathetic thoughts with him.  I thought it would be easier by now, but it isn’t. 
As I read the Ten Commandments in Deuteronomy, I realized they could be written just for me at Christmas time, particularly the commandment on coveting.  I realized I was really just jealous of how it seemed (not necessarily is in real life) easier for everyone else.  I was jealous of how others were spending, other kids were getting all sorts of things, I was the only parent not spending, etc., etc……When I read the commandment on coveting, it spoke of not coveting a neighbour’s wife, house, field, servant, ox, donkey OR ANYTHING THAT IS YOUR NEIGHBOUR’S!  This includes being jealous of Christmas gifts!  I bet I wrote an identical post a year ago and even the year before that.....I hope I beat this weakness this year once and for all.  This was what I needed to read as my thoughts were starting to go down that dangerous path.  God has that commandment there for my protection, to keep me from being discontent.  It is for my own good!  It really should be called the Christmas Coveting Commandment.

I kept reading.  In chapter 5, the Israelites realized how awesome God is and told Moses they will do whatever God says.  But God knew their hearts and said, “Oh that they had such a heart as this always, to fear me and to keep all my commandments, that it might go well with them and with their descendants forever!”  God wants me to stay on track 12 months of the year, not 11 months.  I'm sure it pleases Him when I am careful, frugal all year long, but then He sees my "falling off the wagon" in December.  He must say something similar to this verse in Chapter 5, "Oh that she would just stay on track all year long, then it would go well with her!"  I say that to my kids all the time when they are behaving so nicely, “Oh, I wish you were listening like this all the time!  You would have a much better life!”  But they seem to forget so easily!  Hmmmm....seems I forget, too.

Then, in chapter 7, Moses tells the Israelites about the land they are going to possess and he lists the seven nations “more numerous and mighty than you”.  I immediately thought about the debt “nations” in our life and where Moses listed a nation, I listed the debt which seemed “more numerous and mighty” than me.  I started to ask God to clear each debt “nation” and that He would help us to “defeat them”, just as He helped them to defeat these nations.  God tells them that once the nations are defeated, they must “devote them to complete destruction”, never making any covenant with them and to “show no mercy to them”.   “You shall break down their altars and dash in pieces their pillars and chop down their Asherim and burn their carven images with fire.”  That became the next part of my prayer, that we would devote ourselves to the complete “destruction” of this debt, never entering into any covenant with it again and that once it was gone we would break down, dash, chop, and burn it forever, never to be seen again. 

But, of course, that just seems impossible sometimes. Yet God dealt with this thought, too, as I continued to read, “If you say in your heart, ‘These nations are greater than I.  How can I dispossess them?’  You shall not be afraid of them but you shall remember what the Lord your God did to Pharoah and to all Egypt, the great trials that your eyes saw, the signs, the wonders, the mighty hand, and the outstretched arm by which the Lord your God brought you out.  So will the Lord your God do to all the peoples of whom you are afraid…You shall not be in dread of them, for the Lord your God is in your midst, a great and awesome God. The Lord your God WILL CLEAR AWAY THESE NATIONS BEFORE YOU LITTLE BY LITTLE.  YOU MAY NOT MAKE AN END OF THEM AT ONCE…But the Lord your God will give them over to you and throw them into great confusion, until they are destroyed.

That was just what I needed to read as I often do say in my heart, “This plan is too great for me.  How will we ever do it?”  I am not to be afraid, but to remember all that God has done, the signs, the wonders, the mighty hand, the outstretched arm….. (did He not deliver us this week already with the cheque on Monday???!!!)  God has done all that for us.  He will do this for us as He is in our midst and is a great and awesome God.  But, just like with the nations before Israel, God did not clear them away all at once, but instead “little by little” until they were completely destroyed.  I would prefer all at once, but must be content with little by little.

But I still have questions.  Do we have to do it this way?  Couldn't we learn these lessons another way?  Chapter 8 answers even these questions on why we've had to go through this particular journey....“And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these 40 years in the wilderness, that he might humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments or not.  And he humbled you and let you hunger and fed you with manna….Your clothing did not wear out…your foot did not swell…Know this in your heart that, as a man disciplines his son, the Lord your God disciplines you….”

So, in just one morning, I learned a lot.  I had to deal with my covetous heart.  I was reminded to be a 12 months- a-year follower of God, not just 11 months.  I was given a picture of seven nations, more numerous and mighty than ourselves, but was shown God can defeat these nations, even if they are nations of debt.  Though this seemed impossible, God immediately put my fears to rest by reminding me I need not fear or dread, because each nation will be taken down, "little by little".  And, just when I started questioning His plan, He reiterated it has to be this way - it's all part of the testing, the disciplinging, the humbling....Sure enough, we’ve been tested for a reason, to humble us, find out what was in our hearts, to see if we would do it God’s way.  Yet all along the way, we were fed, clothed…in such creative ways sometimes, just like manna!  We were and still are being disciplined.  I sure don’t love being disciplined and it makes me appreciate why my kids don’t like it either!

I would not choose to wake up this early to learn these things, but I think what I would have missed out on and I'm glad I was woken up.  It seems I had some lessons to learn.....

Tuesday 1 December 2015

Lest Your Forget

This has happened to us countless times now, yet we always marvel at God's timing...

Once again, we were waiting for a cheque.  We were told it was in the works, but you just never know if they are telling you the whole story.  So we waited and waited.  D-day was yesterday.

So, again, we prayed.  We trusted.  We knew we could do nothing to make it come, but the problem was, for some reason, we've noticed the mail doesn't typically come on Monday, don't know why.  It didn't matter, it still had to come! 

RM, who has been still getting up early, reading, praying, decided to act by faith.  He got his cheque book out and was ready to start writing cheques.  He expected God to work. 

That morning I read in Deuteronomy 3, "Do not fear...."  Then, further on down the chapter, it describes how the Israelites "took all his cities at that time - there was not a city that we did not take from them - sixty cities....All these were cities fortified with high walls, gates, and bars....."  God had given this land to the Israelites, though they had to fight for it, but He gave it to them.

What stuck out at me was that these were fortified cities with high walls, gates and bars.  Only God could break down those high walls though they had "devoted themselves to destruction".  Not a happy story in some ways, but the principle I saw was that the Israelites had to play a part.  God didn't just give the land to them.  They had to fight for it.  He fought for them and made the victory possible, but they definitely played a role.

So I started to "devote" myself to prayer....literally all afternoon yesterday.  While the kids played outside, I just sat on the step, or walked around the house praying. I asked God to take down the high wall, the gates, the bars, anything that was a barrier.  I even prayed for the mailwoman!  I wondered if she wasn't coming because she just didn't feel like it!  I prayed she would come!  I find it hard to accept the fact He may not always answer how I want Him to, but I prayed I would accept the fact it wouldn't come.  I also dislike being humbled, but I thanked Him for the fact He keeps us in this humbling position, in this place of dependence.  I went on and on....

But, by 4:30, it seemed she wouldn't come - it was too late in the afternoon and besides, mail doesn't typically come on Monday.  RM and I stood there discussing our options.

Suddenly, our son runs into the kitchen, with the mail!  How could this be?  I didn't even hear the mail truck and I had been listening all day!!!!  He was smiling and holding something that looked "cheque-like"!  Sure enough - there it was, at the 11th hour.....RM had literally minutes before the bank closed and off he went to deposit it, almost getting locked in the bank that's how few seconds he had to spare.

The only way I can explain it is this - He wants our kids to know a very important lesson, one that they must never forget.  It is coincidence that I read this today?  Deuteronomy 4:9,10 puts it this way,

"Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life.  Make them known to your children and your children's children....so that the may learn to fear me all the days that they live on the earth and that they may teach their children so."

I think it is as basic as that - God wants not just us, but our children and their children to know " To you it was shown, that you might know the Lord is God; there is no other besides Him." (Deut. 4:35)  We certainly sat in amazement that night after dinner, just thanking God and talking about His provision yet again.  I really think these right-down-to-the-last-minute answers to prayer are completely orchestrated for our children.  We don't know what is ahead for them in life, but we know they will go through some trials and God wants them to remember these faith lessons, "lest you forget the things your eyes have seen."