No hate mail yet. I sent out the video of yesterday's post and am waiting for the flak. However, at the same time. After I wrote it, recorded it and then sent it, I quickly went to my phone as I get a verse of the day daily and almost inevitably it has to do with exactly what I'm going through in that moment. Sure enough, yesterday's verse was perfect, "The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?" Ps. 118:6 I'm not exactly what I'm afraid of - people finding out that I think we, as wives, need to be more loving and less critical?! I'm afraid to step on people's toes, I guess. Oh well! Too late!
On a different note, we celebrated my youngest son's 8th birthday yesterday. I can hardly believe the "baby" of the family is 8. The expression, "Where does the time go?" seems so cliche, but it's true - how does time go soooo fast?! The benchmark of birthdays is so great though as it caused us last night and all throughout the day to reflect on where we were 8 years ago. Back then we had just purchased the farm and were still carrying the other house, though it was sold, I believe. I delivered the little guy in the tub, my first and only water birth. I was 42 at the time and had no idea that having a baby at 42 was unusual. I found out later that having babies past 40 is pretty unheard of and therefore it strikes me as such an amazing miracle and gift that things went so smoothly with the final two boys. There was a least one baby after, possibly two, but neither pregnancy went further than a few weeks.
As I read a devotional with the family yesterday morning, it, too, was just so perfect. It was about Othniel, one of the first judges in Israel. The verse quoted was Judges 3:9-10, "When they cried out to the Lord, he raised up for them a deliverer, Othniel...Caleb's younger brother, who saved them. The Spirit of the Lord came upon him."
The phrase that jumped out at me was "Caleb's younger brother". God used a younger brother. The Bible doesn't just say "brother", but specifically adds the word "younger". That is so significant to me when I think about my son. He is the younger brother to 7 other kids. He will never have a younger brother or sister. He's it. Yet God chose Othniel. I'm sure there were others he could have used, but He didn't. I've read many stories of famous people who became heroes of sorts and they were often the youngest in the family. If these young children hadn't been born, so much good in the world would not have happened, but to the world, more babies, especially the babies born in large families seem like so much more work, expense, responsibility. Trust me, our last 2 sons were born in one of the busiest seasons of our life! If we had thought the way the world thinks, it made NO SENSE to keep having children. All that to say is that God had a plan for Othniel and God has a plan for my youngest, too.
There is no evidence of how Othniel was prepared. I have no playbook for how my son is going to be prepared for what lies ahead for him. It is interesting to think about how surely God did prepare Othniel in some way and how He'll do the same with my son. The devotional on Othniel read like this, "God is continually preparing His heroes, and when the opportunity is right, He puts them into position in an instant. He works so fast, the world wonders where they came from. Dear friends, let the Holy Spirit prepare you, through the discipline of life....We must allow God to work amid our present trials and in the little victories, the future significance of which we can only imagine."
If I had looked at my oldest son's life at 8 I would never have imagined what lay ahead for him, but now that I can look back, it really was in the day to day tasks and trials that God prepared him for what he is doing now. God has wasted NOTHING. Everything from daily chores, cleaning bathrooms, doing laundry, helping with chickens, cows, horses, dogs and cats, has all helped prepare him. He's had challenging trials in school and work and relationships with friends and family. He's been pruned by us and God and in all of these situations he has become a hero to us and to others. His work at Marineland has demanded so much of him as he has been in dangerous rescues and recoveries of animals. I don't think he would have been able to handle all those challenges he's experienced at work without all the hardships that started at a young age. He is who he is today because of how God used EVERYTHING to train him. Recently we had a cat who looks like he is in a gang and is so beat up we took sympathy on him and brought him in the house to save him from his savage enemy who lurks around the house ready to kill him at any moment. He needed medical care, bandages, and daily attention to heal. You cannot pay me to do that. It is way too gross and disgusting and I have too many empathetic feelings for animals to see them in such distress. Yet, my oldest son, not only has compassion, but is able to distance himself, be objective and address the wounds without falling apart even when the cat is crying out in pain when he is changing the bandages. We all watched him do this this week without flinching. We all attributed this to how he'd been prepared by all his life experience around the farm and overseas this past Fall.
All this to say, I love having a large family as it allows me to see the youngest one with such different eyes. I don't have to dread his hard experiences that are surely coming. I don't have to be afraid. I might have to remind myself now and then that what is coming will be difficult to watch, but it will be good for him. It will all be a part of God's plan for him. God will use every daily experience, every chore, all the school work, EVERYTHING, for good in his life. It will make him into a hero in another way, I'm sure. His name is Brock Paton. We named him after the missionary John Paton who changed a savage cannibal nation into one that follows Christ. We named him after General Brock who led a whole army into enemy territory and died showing unbelievable leadership skills that also changed a nation in the war of 1812. We want him to live up to these names, but that can only come with a whole series of experiences that will prepare him. "The Spirit of the Lord was upon him" with Othniel. I pray the Spirit will also be upon my son and that God will "raise up" my son to be a "deliverer" of some sort as Othniel was to the Israelites.
Wednesday 29 April 2020
Monday 27 April 2020
80 in 2020 in 40 Day Quarantine
Yesterday has to go down as one of the top moments in the quarantine. My Dad turned 80 and because we couldn't get together as a family to celebrate we decided to do what the rest of the world has been doing and did a zoom call. It was actually sooooo fun and amazing to have all of us together on the screen from Toronto to a little town outside Chicago.....30 of us were together in a live chat with my Mom and Dad. We set it up that the grandkids would ask him any question about his life and then he would answer. It was so great to hear their questions as he's had a pretty interesting life. He did a lot of hunting in Africa, got lost for several days in the bush, had to take rabies shots because of a dog bite from a rabid dog, was surrounded by water buffalo and hippo on shooting expeditions, grew up on a farm and broke his neck after tumbling in a horse accident while racing against a friend (he won the race), met my mom and was instantly attracted to her, dated long distance and were married within 3 years - a very full life! And now he has 22 grandchildren! Amazing.
I couldn't help but think it was so cool to turn 80 in 2020 during the 40 day quarantine! Loved that! For the next few days he and my mom will both be 80 (her birthday is in a few days). Really special. They've impacted a lot of lives, that is for sure. Having all our parents in their 80s and in good health is a tremendous blessing and we know it is rare which makes us appreciate it all the more.
Today I am wanting to gag. The air in our house is full of chicken stench. We've had to keep the stinky birds indoors longer than planned because it has been so cold. As of today they are moving out into the barn so it is a GOOD day.
All our kittens are gone except for one, so we even made some money during quarantine and we managed to bless a few families with pandemic pets! I was so glad we had the kitties while we were locked in. It helped my kids so much. I cannot explain the blessing of kittens in our lives. I thank God for cats so much!
Our garden will get tilled up very soon thanks to a new tiller we found online. We had been looking to buy something that was a little more hard core than the toy one we'd been using that nearly killed us every time. We managed to get one for a great deal and it'll arrive this week. We are now documenting the whole process and will be sharing it through my husband's instagram. It'll be fun to see the stages unfold.
I read a great verse in Proverbs yesterday, Proverbs 22:3. It says, "The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it." We feel by preparing a garden, getting some extra animals, and maybe even learning to can on a larger scale is an example of being prudent, not fearful. We aren't hiding ourselves in a cave or locking ourselves in our home. Instead the "hiding" we are doing is more the principle of making sure we are able to provide food for our family, protecting our family from scarcity, making sure we don't rely on unreliable food sources, and of course, the bonus is that it'll be a healthier lifestyle and more times together as family. And, I see it as "what do we have", Elijah-style, and using the resource of land and living in Niagara where everything grows so great as a real blessing and good use of what we have. We have a greater responsibility just by nature of being a large family, to not prepare, I think, would classify us as "simple" and we might "suffer for it" if we just hope we always have enough. We are already learning so much just by thinking about gardening and the kids will learn a ton, too. Again, the size of our family is definitely motivating and reading every day about the next meat plant that has shut down is somewhat alarming. We aren't living in fear, but I appreciate that the Bible includes verses about danger and the reality that there is danger in the world. Quite simply, we don't want to be ignorant of that danger and so we're attempting to be more prepared, as much as we can be.
The word is the farmer's market is now cancelled, so that's no big deal. We anticipated that and are actually somewhat happy about that to be honest as it was a challenge last summer to pack everything up and be there ready to go and then hardly sell anything! We honestly had more success at the side of the road last year, so now we are going to be set up at the side of the road, on our property, which I am waaaaay happier about. I look forward to all the people I am going to meet already!
There is now a loose chick running around my house. I can't catch it! Gotta go get some kids.....
I couldn't help but think it was so cool to turn 80 in 2020 during the 40 day quarantine! Loved that! For the next few days he and my mom will both be 80 (her birthday is in a few days). Really special. They've impacted a lot of lives, that is for sure. Having all our parents in their 80s and in good health is a tremendous blessing and we know it is rare which makes us appreciate it all the more.
Today I am wanting to gag. The air in our house is full of chicken stench. We've had to keep the stinky birds indoors longer than planned because it has been so cold. As of today they are moving out into the barn so it is a GOOD day.
All our kittens are gone except for one, so we even made some money during quarantine and we managed to bless a few families with pandemic pets! I was so glad we had the kitties while we were locked in. It helped my kids so much. I cannot explain the blessing of kittens in our lives. I thank God for cats so much!
Our garden will get tilled up very soon thanks to a new tiller we found online. We had been looking to buy something that was a little more hard core than the toy one we'd been using that nearly killed us every time. We managed to get one for a great deal and it'll arrive this week. We are now documenting the whole process and will be sharing it through my husband's instagram. It'll be fun to see the stages unfold.
I read a great verse in Proverbs yesterday, Proverbs 22:3. It says, "The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it." We feel by preparing a garden, getting some extra animals, and maybe even learning to can on a larger scale is an example of being prudent, not fearful. We aren't hiding ourselves in a cave or locking ourselves in our home. Instead the "hiding" we are doing is more the principle of making sure we are able to provide food for our family, protecting our family from scarcity, making sure we don't rely on unreliable food sources, and of course, the bonus is that it'll be a healthier lifestyle and more times together as family. And, I see it as "what do we have", Elijah-style, and using the resource of land and living in Niagara where everything grows so great as a real blessing and good use of what we have. We have a greater responsibility just by nature of being a large family, to not prepare, I think, would classify us as "simple" and we might "suffer for it" if we just hope we always have enough. We are already learning so much just by thinking about gardening and the kids will learn a ton, too. Again, the size of our family is definitely motivating and reading every day about the next meat plant that has shut down is somewhat alarming. We aren't living in fear, but I appreciate that the Bible includes verses about danger and the reality that there is danger in the world. Quite simply, we don't want to be ignorant of that danger and so we're attempting to be more prepared, as much as we can be.
The word is the farmer's market is now cancelled, so that's no big deal. We anticipated that and are actually somewhat happy about that to be honest as it was a challenge last summer to pack everything up and be there ready to go and then hardly sell anything! We honestly had more success at the side of the road last year, so now we are going to be set up at the side of the road, on our property, which I am waaaaay happier about. I look forward to all the people I am going to meet already!
There is now a loose chick running around my house. I can't catch it! Gotta go get some kids.....
Friday 24 April 2020
Funny Mom Comments, Why My Kids Put Me Down For Naps and God Talks To Hagar
Two of the best comments came out of my kids this week. I had to write them down. The first one came from my 9 year old who said I looked older than my Dad. I almost choked. My Dad is reaching a very big milestone this week, turning another decade and I actually do think he has aged extremely well, but do I really look 30 years older? Please explain otherwise I'll have to run out and get some new moisturizer!!!! We figured it out.....I have recently made the HUGE leap, and I mean HUGE, sooooo HUGE that I literally agonized for weeks if not months over what to do....do I continue highlighting my hair or, gasp, let it go naturally grey, which it has been doing on its own for years, but I've always hid it to some degree with highlights. Well, it shouldn't be that big a deal, but it was, and with my husband's encouragment (truly his idea) and even my kids (they were all so kind), and my hairdresser (who was behind it all the time and was the one who said, "Go for it!"), I made the leap. My 9 year old wasn't so sure he liked it. "You're going to look old!" he said. Oh well! I think that was what hit me....I AM old! Or at least older! So I decided to stop fighting it. There are lots of great grey hair verses in the Bible that I always glossed over. I never liked them, now I'm ok with them! Anway, that was where the "You look older than Gramps!" came in. Apparently I have more grey hair than my Dad. So, in conclusion, if you do decide to stop colouring your hair, apparently you'll age 30 years. Sigh.....However, I've been joined by countless women who show up in social media and from what I can see I'm a part of the new trend to go grey naturally. I have to say, there are days I don't love it, but for the most part, I'm ok with it and there is a funny freedom in making the decision, not to mention the hair budget has been literally erased. So, that was comment one. The next one is even better.
Yesterday I was up at a literally insane hour. Awake at 4, I tried and tried to go back to sleep, but gave up at 4:30, so came down, exercised in the mudroom because one of my kids was sleeping on the couch (this is funny...because we had beans for dinner that night and he didn't want to gas his brother to death in the loft! Haha!). Then I did my news catch up, coffee, Bible reading, etc....and was doing great, lots of energy until about 12:30 or 1. That was when I told the kids I was just going to lay down for a FEW MINUTES. I had NO IDEA that I was going to sleep until 4:30!!!!! I haven't done that in probably years! I guess I was way more tired than I realized and must have gone into quarantine/coma mode. When/if I do lay down it is always for 15-20 minutes, so I assumed that was what had happened. I came downstairs and I was newly energized, making lots of noise, like a kid who has napped and was feeling good. My kids started asking me what we were going to do for dinner.....what?! I looked at the clock and my mouth dropped! Where had the time gone?! That was when everyone started floating into the kitchen saying things like, "There you are! Where have you been?!" Then, the best comment....my oldest daughter said, "It was so quiet when you were asleep!" Ha! Now I know where my crazy, busy, loud sons get it from - ME!!!! I was so completely awake after my hours long nap that I was bopping around the kitchen, joking, laughing, having a great, loud time and apparently the house had been quite quiet while I was asleep....we all laughed. I guess the kid in me went for a nap, too, that day. So glad I gave my kids a break! Ha! They should put me down for my long afternoon nap everyday! Everyone thinks it's the toddlers who needs naps to give the parents a break. Not here. It's the kids who need to put down the crazy moms...it's the KIDS who need the break in our house. I laughed a loooong time about that one.
But, back to the early hour. I don't fight the early wake ups. I'm quite convinced God has something to say to me in those early morning wake ups. I actually start looking forward to what God is going to say. And it was great. Two passages jumped out at me. One in Psalm 138 and the other was Genesis 16.
Psalm 138:7, "Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life." I had been feeling a certain degree of uncertainty as our work situation is stable to some degree, but we were recently told all of my husband's teaching will dry up as of next month as they are cancelling the program for the summer. There will be financial impact starting in a matter of days. We always want to be in a better financial situation, not worse. However, this is where we find ourselves. With the low lying stress in the back of my mind, I read that verse and the devotional I was reading focused on the phrase, "in the midst of trouble" meaning "right in the middle of it". That was perfect. God is in the middle of our trouble. That's where He meets us and that was where I was. I hung on to that. The Psalm ended with this verse, "The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever." So I spoke to my thoughts, wrote them all out and actively claimed those promises for myself. We're actually kind of excited as having him around more in the evenings will free up time for us to farm, garden, plan, maybe do more side things. It might work out in the long run better to have him home more, so perhaps a strange blessing?
Then in Genesis 16 I read about Sarai, Abram and Hagar. Because they were so impatient to get God's promise of a son, Sarai felt she had to step in. Big mistake. Abram's big mistake was listening to Sarai, "And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai." Oops. But it follows the path of the curse, women desiring their husbands, or as I like to say, "desiring the role of their husbands". And, Abram, also follows the curse of Adam and is passive not encouraging Sarai to be full of faith, but instead goes along with her scheme, which, of course, backfires and causes marital strife. Sarai then has the nerve to blame Abram later, "May the wrong done to me be on you!" What?! It was HER idea! But, that is the classic problem in marriage. The woman takes the lead role, then starts resenting the fact her husband has become passive and then she blames him when all along it has been her fault for taking over! Oh, the irony! There you have it - Marriage Disaster Recipe 101 - what NOT to do.
Meanwhile, Hagar is now pregnant with Abram's child and Sarai is jealous and treats her badly. Instead of supporting Hagar, Abram gives Sarai permission to be unkind, "...do to her as you please." Not surprisingly, it says, "...and she fled from her." Hagar ran away. Who wouldn't?
This was the part that jumped out at me and I had never seen this before. The angel of the Lord meets her and "found her by a spring of water in the wilderness". He then tells her, "Return to your mistress and submit to her." That was the line I had never seen before. Go back. The angel tells her to return. It makes no sense. Nothing was going to be different. Sarai was still going to be the same unkind mistress. But this is the key.....she wasn't supposed to leave until GOD told her to leave. And this was when I started to put it all together. It ties into the other post I wrote where being in the wilderness or the darkness is actually not a good thing, but a God thing. Hagar left on her own accord, God never told her to leave. It's not because it was going to get better there, but it's that God has a plan for everything, even darkness and hard times and difficult people and awful situations. We are supposed to wait on God to get us out of them. So, even though it probably made no sense, she is supposed to return to the difficult situation. We are simply not supposed to "kindle a fire". "Let him who walks in darkness and has no light trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God." No kindling of torches, no walking by light we have created, no fleeing. We are supposed to trust in God in our darkness. Talk about the opposite of how we all feel in those situations. It makes sense to want to run and get a flashlight!!!
But this is the neat part of the story. She listens! She obeys! And I'm quite convinced it is in the obedience that she is blessed. The angel of the Lord says to her, "I will surely multiple your offspring so that they cannot be numbered for multitude." Then Hagar responds to this and says, "You are a God of seeing". How I love that phrase. "Truly here I have seen Him who looks after me." She doesn't question Him or His commands. She sees it as good and is so grateful that He met her there and saw her in her wilderness. She felt looked after. It actually ties in so well to the verse in Psalm 138. He met her "in the midst of trouble". Even in her fleeing, He met her.
Before quarantine it was hard enough. There are very few solid Christian men and women for the marrying. Godly friendships are hard to find. Then you add quarantine and it starts to feel, if you are a young adult, that maybe just maybe, you're going to be single for life. That's how some people in my house are feeling. As I shared with them this passage, so many things came to my mind that this could relate to, but as I talk with my kids in particular I shared with them to stop fighting their wilderness, to not go ahead of God and settle for just anyone, to not take matters into their own hands and then flee to the wilderness to wrong friendships, wrong relationships, because it is clear in these verses that only God gets to tell us when to move and when to flee, when to marry, which friendships are best. I found out later that was a real encouragement to them because at some point we all feel like Hagar and even Sarai. We don't trust God deep down to take care of us. We don't think He sees us and that He won't look after us, so we step in to help God because, obviously, though He can, He just isn't or He won't. Things always go badly when we do this as they did for Sarai and Abram. Strife happens. People get hurt. Wrong decisions are made.
The encouragement is clear, though. God does see. He looks after us. He redeems bad decisions. How wonderful is that.
Anyway, my early morning brought great clarity to the Scriptures and then a hilariously long nap that afternoon. The whole point? If you can't sleep, get up, listen to what God is trying to tell you and then later go lay down...the day will pass a lot faster and you'll have something to tell others!lol
I did get up early today, not as early as yesterday, but early enough. My kids will be excited to put me down for my nap after lunch, I'm sure.
Monday 20 April 2020
Quarantine and the Ark - Amazing Parallels
I've never been able to commit to a one-year reading plan as some days I read 1 chapter, other days 3 and then there are others where we've read together as a family and I miss my personal reading. All that to say, the goal is to keep reading through the Bible as many times as possible. whether it takes a year or three. I don't know how many times I've done this, but I find it interesting that I just finished Revelation during the pandemic and then started up Genesis, also during the pandemic.
Revelation was a wake-up call as I read it with new eyes. For the first time I was reading it thinking, "We might actually be as close to the end times as we've ever been!" Then reading the timeline of the final days, even though I don't understand much of it, was also like reading it for the first time as I really wanted to know the details. I was reading it thinking this could happen sooner than we think! It made me think that it should be required reading for all unbelievers right now so that they know what is coming and for all believers so that they would know why they should be telling everyone they know who doesn't know! Even if we all get scooped up in the rapture, (and there are arguments that say we will go through the tribulation?) whoever is left behind is going to go through some very awful times. "People gnawed their tongues in anguish and cursed the God of heaven for their pain and sores." (16:10)
I eventually finished it a few days ago, which was also neat timing as Easter was last weekend. It was neat to be in Revelation knowing it was truly the story of Easter. It was just telling the final chapters. As I went into Genesis, at first whenever I start the Bible over there's always this feeling that it'll feel old as I've read the creation story so many times and all the familiar stories at the beginning, but not this time. As I read it this time there was a sense of newness for me as I saw how the world was perfect, then sin entered in, then how God saw Noah and decided to erase all the people on the world who had become so corrupt.....kind of like now.....
As I read the story of Noah, I couldn't believe the parallels. God "saw the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually." (6:5) Doesn't that describe our current world situation? Yet God had promised to never flood the world again. Well, technically the virus isn't a flood, but instead a flood of disease? Is God doing a sweep of the world right now? I've heard that literally the world is getting cleaned up as there is less pollution, less cars, even less crime.
I read this week that the word "quarantine" is from the latin word for "forty". Hmmmm....the flood was also forty days and forty nights of rain. My favourite verse in the story of Noah is in chapter 7. After God tells Noah how to build the ark and why he is building it "for all the earth was filled with violence...and it was corrupt", he told Noah, "Go into the ark, you and your household, for I have seen that you are righteous before me in this generation." And then, get ready for it, it says, "And then the Lord shut him in." That's right. Noah was quarantined for forty days and forty nights, with his family and a whole bunch of animals. Hey! That's kind of like us! I'm surrounded by my family AND I have at least 49 chicks, 5 cats, some fish, and a tarantula and all the food they need to survive. Even when the time of rain was over, they still had to stay on the ark for 150 days after for the land to dry out. That might happen after the 40 day quarantine period is over here, too. We won't go back to normal living for a long time, I'm sure. It'll take at least 150 days to sort things out.
So what is the true parallel?....the secret is in Hebrews. Noah is mentioned in Hebrews 11 for his faith. It says, "By faith Noah, being warned by God concerning events as yet unseen, in reverent fear constructed an ark for the saving of his household. By this he condemned the world and became an heir of the righteousness that comes by faith." (11:7) I think this is the whole point of quarantine and why I see such a parallel between the flood and the pandemic. The flood was the time Noah was supposed to save "his household". This is what we are supposed to be doing now. We are supposed to use this time to save our household! God has shut us all in. The government will make you think it was their idea, but I think it was God's. This is a time to renew our families, our times of family worship, our prayer times together, our times of family discussions, our finances, our physical structures, our emotional structures, our spiritual structures. At some point the door will be opened and we'll have to go out of this time of safety, which quite honestly, I'd rather stay on the ark, but even Noah had to get off. But we can get out of our arks stronger, brighter, ready to hit the new world if we use this time intentionally. I know I know everyone is saying "Enough with being productive! I just want to survive the pandemic!" That's not what I'm saying. It isn't about learning how to do sourdough bread during this time, I'm talking about rescuing our families from disaster. In our house, everyone was starting to never be home, never have full together family time like we used to. I know that isn't unusual and it is "normal" as they grow up and leave the nest, but at the same time, it isn't good to be so scattered where no one talks or communicates because they're just too busy. And busy doing what? Nothing? Just stuff? That's not good. I'm sorry for them that they might be stir crazy, but I'm also so glad. We are having more family discussions than ever and IT IS GOOD! God is rescuing us. God is helping us construct an ark during this crazy time for the "saving of our household".
I've always loved the number 40. I studied it like crazy when I turned 40 and couldn't believe the number of instances in the Bible it shows up. This is just another example, a crazy one, that is so incredibly relevant to me personally again. I thank God for this flood/pandemic. It's actually really neat to be alive during this time in history and makes me appreciate Noah and his experience in a more real way as the whole world is literally going through this together right now.
The irony? The symbol of the rainbow is now the symbol of hope in all the hospital windows and houses. It was stolen by the Pride people, but it has been taken back. God owned it in the first place.
Revelation was a wake-up call as I read it with new eyes. For the first time I was reading it thinking, "We might actually be as close to the end times as we've ever been!" Then reading the timeline of the final days, even though I don't understand much of it, was also like reading it for the first time as I really wanted to know the details. I was reading it thinking this could happen sooner than we think! It made me think that it should be required reading for all unbelievers right now so that they know what is coming and for all believers so that they would know why they should be telling everyone they know who doesn't know! Even if we all get scooped up in the rapture, (and there are arguments that say we will go through the tribulation?) whoever is left behind is going to go through some very awful times. "People gnawed their tongues in anguish and cursed the God of heaven for their pain and sores." (16:10)
I eventually finished it a few days ago, which was also neat timing as Easter was last weekend. It was neat to be in Revelation knowing it was truly the story of Easter. It was just telling the final chapters. As I went into Genesis, at first whenever I start the Bible over there's always this feeling that it'll feel old as I've read the creation story so many times and all the familiar stories at the beginning, but not this time. As I read it this time there was a sense of newness for me as I saw how the world was perfect, then sin entered in, then how God saw Noah and decided to erase all the people on the world who had become so corrupt.....kind of like now.....
As I read the story of Noah, I couldn't believe the parallels. God "saw the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually." (6:5) Doesn't that describe our current world situation? Yet God had promised to never flood the world again. Well, technically the virus isn't a flood, but instead a flood of disease? Is God doing a sweep of the world right now? I've heard that literally the world is getting cleaned up as there is less pollution, less cars, even less crime.
I read this week that the word "quarantine" is from the latin word for "forty". Hmmmm....the flood was also forty days and forty nights of rain. My favourite verse in the story of Noah is in chapter 7. After God tells Noah how to build the ark and why he is building it "for all the earth was filled with violence...and it was corrupt", he told Noah, "Go into the ark, you and your household, for I have seen that you are righteous before me in this generation." And then, get ready for it, it says, "And then the Lord shut him in." That's right. Noah was quarantined for forty days and forty nights, with his family and a whole bunch of animals. Hey! That's kind of like us! I'm surrounded by my family AND I have at least 49 chicks, 5 cats, some fish, and a tarantula and all the food they need to survive. Even when the time of rain was over, they still had to stay on the ark for 150 days after for the land to dry out. That might happen after the 40 day quarantine period is over here, too. We won't go back to normal living for a long time, I'm sure. It'll take at least 150 days to sort things out.
So what is the true parallel?....the secret is in Hebrews. Noah is mentioned in Hebrews 11 for his faith. It says, "By faith Noah, being warned by God concerning events as yet unseen, in reverent fear constructed an ark for the saving of his household. By this he condemned the world and became an heir of the righteousness that comes by faith." (11:7) I think this is the whole point of quarantine and why I see such a parallel between the flood and the pandemic. The flood was the time Noah was supposed to save "his household". This is what we are supposed to be doing now. We are supposed to use this time to save our household! God has shut us all in. The government will make you think it was their idea, but I think it was God's. This is a time to renew our families, our times of family worship, our prayer times together, our times of family discussions, our finances, our physical structures, our emotional structures, our spiritual structures. At some point the door will be opened and we'll have to go out of this time of safety, which quite honestly, I'd rather stay on the ark, but even Noah had to get off. But we can get out of our arks stronger, brighter, ready to hit the new world if we use this time intentionally. I know I know everyone is saying "Enough with being productive! I just want to survive the pandemic!" That's not what I'm saying. It isn't about learning how to do sourdough bread during this time, I'm talking about rescuing our families from disaster. In our house, everyone was starting to never be home, never have full together family time like we used to. I know that isn't unusual and it is "normal" as they grow up and leave the nest, but at the same time, it isn't good to be so scattered where no one talks or communicates because they're just too busy. And busy doing what? Nothing? Just stuff? That's not good. I'm sorry for them that they might be stir crazy, but I'm also so glad. We are having more family discussions than ever and IT IS GOOD! God is rescuing us. God is helping us construct an ark during this crazy time for the "saving of our household".
I've always loved the number 40. I studied it like crazy when I turned 40 and couldn't believe the number of instances in the Bible it shows up. This is just another example, a crazy one, that is so incredibly relevant to me personally again. I thank God for this flood/pandemic. It's actually really neat to be alive during this time in history and makes me appreciate Noah and his experience in a more real way as the whole world is literally going through this together right now.
The irony? The symbol of the rainbow is now the symbol of hope in all the hospital windows and houses. It was stolen by the Pride people, but it has been taken back. God owned it in the first place.
Monday 13 April 2020
I Like Being Nuts
It's going to warm today, but super wet and super windy. A "bomb cyclone" is supposed to occur this afternoon which is basically what my house looks like it has been hit by right now. Clothes are all over the floor, dishes, garbage, pillows. Everyone is hanging out here all day and it shows. By the end of the day, I'm pretty wasted and that's when I should be getting everyone to tidy, but instead I go to bed and I'm literally asleep within seconds. I'm going to have to adjust the cleaning schedule a bit so I don't come down to this every day. The problem is with the Covid-19 thing going on, every day literally feels like a Saturday....
Not knowing how long this is going to go on has made us adjust our farming, gardening and living-more-self-sufficiently mindset. Before this crisis, we always knew we had grocery stores as back-up, farmer's markets, etc. But everything feels up in the air right now and so we've made some plans. We'll begin with the garden.....
We've grown a garden a few years, but the only year we had major success was the year my husband was involved in the tilling, seeding and weeding. Now that his schedule is a little freer he's committed to being more involved which I hope will guarantee success again! On the one hand, I'm so excited to actually grow a garden and have fresh vegetables because I've bugged him for so many years. But on the other hand, I'm a little worried as he's taking this "plan ahead" thing to whole new level. The amount of seeds we've ordered should get us through any apocalypse. I've canned in the past for fun. Now it looks like I'll be canning enough to have my own canning show. He promises to help! My kids saw what we were doing the day we ordered the seeds and my oldest started asking questions in a very funny worried voice, "Mooooommm.....Daaaaadddd? What are you doing???? What are you getting us into????" I laughed out loud as they know when we do stuff it's never on a small scale and that we somehow always rope them into something without getting a lot of buy-in until it's too late and their involved whether they like it or not....haha...Sorry about that!!!
We're going to give the micro-green thing a go again as well, but we'll move it on-line which I'm horrible at, but I guess it's something I'll have to get better at....maybe with some help from some reluctant kids.....
My husband is brainstorming extra income ideas constantly as he'll lose some of his teaching income soon. That will free up some time though to get something going he hopes. Even though he's at the college full-time he still hasn't lost his entrepreneurial spirit which is great.
We're still selling things on kijiji. I'm glad that hasn't been shut down, so that is a source of income, too, though erratic.
We plan on still selling hay though we can't sell to Florida anymore due to the border being closed. The horses in Florida will have to eat local!
We did a fair amount of bulk buying just so we don't have to head to a grocery store as often. That has been quite the experience lately as I've been in waiting lines outside and inside the store. Don't love that. I usually go first thing in the morning when I do go, but even then there are line ups.
Tomorrow we head out to pick up a bunch of meat chickens. We'll being eating fresh free-range birds in 2 months, so that's great. We have enough space in our freezer so we can handle that. Then, in June we'll be picking up layers, enough to sell eggs at the side of the road as well as for ourselves. That means we have some work to do in our barn to set up for all those birds. No more walking all over the property, as much as they love that. I don't!
We're looking into buying some piglets, too.....these animals make me want to be vegan, but I do love pork, so we'll only get a couple. But it seems like everyone is thinking the same way, so we are having a hard time finding some! They're all quite far away.
We won't be planting any more vines this year, but we are half way done all the pruning and the plants that made it are looking good. I've never seen my kids so keen on getting in the vines! They actually seem to enjoy the whole process and it gets them in the fresh air and doing work so it's been really positive.
If I think too much about all these purchases, I start to feel a little on the overwhelmed side, but again, my husband has promised to help and the kids will be on board if they want to eat. I'll be real nervous if he starts buying sheep so that I make my own wool. I might draw the line there.
I'm wishing he would get a dairy cow, but he's drawing the line on that one....maybe one day....so he does seem to have his limits.
The way we do things is a little backwards. You're supposed to count the cost and then make your decisions. We do count the cost, but we don't really think too much about the work involved. I have a funny feeling that, as usual, we're going to be over our heads in vegetables, jars, chickens, eggs and a side business at the side of the road, but generally speaking that's how we feel most of the time....kind of a drowning feeling, but in a good way? That might not make sense, but this is the thing, we know we have a lot of mouths to feed. We know the grocery stores and things like viruses are unpredictable, so we're just making a plan that makes sense so we aren't out of food one day. We also love having things for our kids to do that are meaningful and, yes, hard work. The days that they are out in the vines, they sleep harder and feel more productive, so even though they are a little nervous, we actually think they are kind of excited deep down. There are days I'm quite certain they would like to have different parents, but then again, deep down, I think they're glad that we're a little nuts. I like being nuts. I like having a crazy husband. I like that he's willing to do things that make sense and yet make no sense. It's a lot more fun to live this way, so I don't mind even though I'm quite certain come June, July and August I'll wish for a less crazy husband when I'm drowning in carrots and cucumbers.
Oh well....for now it's fun to anticipate, even look forward to the work that's starting tomorrow with chicks......and really, are we nuts? Or are we doing what they used to do only a generation ago? If you google canning or gardening or living off-grid, tons and tons of websites and youtube channels show up. We are hardly the first ones to want to live this way. It is a lot more work, I will admit that, but it should be a little easier now that there are so many at home with capable working hands. I guess we'll see what happens!
Not knowing how long this is going to go on has made us adjust our farming, gardening and living-more-self-sufficiently mindset. Before this crisis, we always knew we had grocery stores as back-up, farmer's markets, etc. But everything feels up in the air right now and so we've made some plans. We'll begin with the garden.....
We've grown a garden a few years, but the only year we had major success was the year my husband was involved in the tilling, seeding and weeding. Now that his schedule is a little freer he's committed to being more involved which I hope will guarantee success again! On the one hand, I'm so excited to actually grow a garden and have fresh vegetables because I've bugged him for so many years. But on the other hand, I'm a little worried as he's taking this "plan ahead" thing to whole new level. The amount of seeds we've ordered should get us through any apocalypse. I've canned in the past for fun. Now it looks like I'll be canning enough to have my own canning show. He promises to help! My kids saw what we were doing the day we ordered the seeds and my oldest started asking questions in a very funny worried voice, "Mooooommm.....Daaaaadddd? What are you doing???? What are you getting us into????" I laughed out loud as they know when we do stuff it's never on a small scale and that we somehow always rope them into something without getting a lot of buy-in until it's too late and their involved whether they like it or not....haha...Sorry about that!!!
We're going to give the micro-green thing a go again as well, but we'll move it on-line which I'm horrible at, but I guess it's something I'll have to get better at....maybe with some help from some reluctant kids.....
My husband is brainstorming extra income ideas constantly as he'll lose some of his teaching income soon. That will free up some time though to get something going he hopes. Even though he's at the college full-time he still hasn't lost his entrepreneurial spirit which is great.
We're still selling things on kijiji. I'm glad that hasn't been shut down, so that is a source of income, too, though erratic.
We plan on still selling hay though we can't sell to Florida anymore due to the border being closed. The horses in Florida will have to eat local!
We did a fair amount of bulk buying just so we don't have to head to a grocery store as often. That has been quite the experience lately as I've been in waiting lines outside and inside the store. Don't love that. I usually go first thing in the morning when I do go, but even then there are line ups.
Tomorrow we head out to pick up a bunch of meat chickens. We'll being eating fresh free-range birds in 2 months, so that's great. We have enough space in our freezer so we can handle that. Then, in June we'll be picking up layers, enough to sell eggs at the side of the road as well as for ourselves. That means we have some work to do in our barn to set up for all those birds. No more walking all over the property, as much as they love that. I don't!
We're looking into buying some piglets, too.....these animals make me want to be vegan, but I do love pork, so we'll only get a couple. But it seems like everyone is thinking the same way, so we are having a hard time finding some! They're all quite far away.
We won't be planting any more vines this year, but we are half way done all the pruning and the plants that made it are looking good. I've never seen my kids so keen on getting in the vines! They actually seem to enjoy the whole process and it gets them in the fresh air and doing work so it's been really positive.
If I think too much about all these purchases, I start to feel a little on the overwhelmed side, but again, my husband has promised to help and the kids will be on board if they want to eat. I'll be real nervous if he starts buying sheep so that I make my own wool. I might draw the line there.
I'm wishing he would get a dairy cow, but he's drawing the line on that one....maybe one day....so he does seem to have his limits.
The way we do things is a little backwards. You're supposed to count the cost and then make your decisions. We do count the cost, but we don't really think too much about the work involved. I have a funny feeling that, as usual, we're going to be over our heads in vegetables, jars, chickens, eggs and a side business at the side of the road, but generally speaking that's how we feel most of the time....kind of a drowning feeling, but in a good way? That might not make sense, but this is the thing, we know we have a lot of mouths to feed. We know the grocery stores and things like viruses are unpredictable, so we're just making a plan that makes sense so we aren't out of food one day. We also love having things for our kids to do that are meaningful and, yes, hard work. The days that they are out in the vines, they sleep harder and feel more productive, so even though they are a little nervous, we actually think they are kind of excited deep down. There are days I'm quite certain they would like to have different parents, but then again, deep down, I think they're glad that we're a little nuts. I like being nuts. I like having a crazy husband. I like that he's willing to do things that make sense and yet make no sense. It's a lot more fun to live this way, so I don't mind even though I'm quite certain come June, July and August I'll wish for a less crazy husband when I'm drowning in carrots and cucumbers.
Oh well....for now it's fun to anticipate, even look forward to the work that's starting tomorrow with chicks......and really, are we nuts? Or are we doing what they used to do only a generation ago? If you google canning or gardening or living off-grid, tons and tons of websites and youtube channels show up. We are hardly the first ones to want to live this way. It is a lot more work, I will admit that, but it should be a little easier now that there are so many at home with capable working hands. I guess we'll see what happens!
Wednesday 1 April 2020
A Solemn Warning to Those Who "Kindle Their Own Fire"
No one likes walking in darkness. We are all impatient and we want things figured out, solved, fixed, right away. This is true for little things like broken dishwashers (our's is now broken for, what, the 3rd or 4th time?!) and big things like pandemics. Yet I read something this week that I have never seen ever in the Bible before and it has changed my thinking on this forever. The devotional that accompanied it was so profound as well that I had to share it.
It's Isaiah 50:10 and 11, "Who among you fears the Lord and obeys the voice of his servant? Let him who walks in darkness and has no light trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God. Behold, all you who kindle a fire, who equip yourselves with burning torches! Walk by the light of your fire, and by the torches that you have kindled! This you have from my hand: you shall lie down in torment."
I was rather confused at verse 11 at first until I read the commentary on it that followed. It basically described how this is a "solemn warning to those who walk in darkness and who try to help themselves find the light." These are people like Abraham and Sarah who were promised a son, but that son didn't come for 25 years!!!! So, Abraham felt like he needed to step in and help God because clearly he'd been forgotten and God must need some help....wrong......!! The amazing thing is that God doesn't stop him!!! He doesn't stop Hagar from getting pregnant. He doesn't send a messenger to warn him that that was a bad idea. He lets Abraham "kindle a fire" and that's where the verse suddenly became clear. These people who make "fire", their own light, so to speak, equipping themselves "with burning torches" will end up lying down "in torment". In other words, there will be consequences for not waiting on God, not letting God work, in HIS TIME, not our's.
This is how we do this. We "try to help ourselves", the devotional says. "We seek the light of the natural way and the advice of our friends. We reason out our own conclusions and thereby may be tempted to accept a path of deliverance that would not be of God at all." But these are always the wrong path. The light is bright, sure, but it isn't God's light. They are "deceptive beacons leading us toward the danger of the rocks." And this is the scary part, "God will allow us to walk in the false light of those sparks, but the end will be sorrow."
I have had multiple friends now in rough marriages and these are Christian marriages, at least where the wife is a believer. Most of the women have done the right thing, and by God's grace, have stayed together. They have stayed the path of faithfulness, of literally walking in darkness, never knowing if the husband will ever be saved, never knowing if they'll have the dream marriage they long for. I marvel at this kind of strength as marriage is really hard even if both are saved! How they do this is only supernatural. But the amazing fruit coming out of their faithfulness is incredible - children who love the Lord, who are following God's way all because of the willingness of the Mom to trust God in her darkness.
I've always advised staying together, always. I've encouraged periods of separation to work things out, but I've never advised divorce. I've encouraged getting outside help, but never leaving permanently. I've been told, "You have no idea." I know. I don't. I've been told, "You wouldn't understand." I haven't claimed to. All I have is the Bible and I only know what I know, what I read in it. I believe the promises. But, there's always been this part of me that really doesn't know their pain and so I understand that it must be harder than I could ever imagine. I've tried even then to encourage a deep faith in God, even though they are in the midst of what seems like torture probably.
But this verse was a real challenge to me and the devotional went on, "Beloved, never try to get out of a dark place except in God's timing and in His way. A time of trouble and darkness is meant to teach you lessons you desperately need. Premature deliverance may circumvent God's work of grace in your life. Commit the entire situation to Him and BE WILLING TO ABIDE IN DARKNESS, knowing He is present. Remember it is better to walk in the dark with God than to walk alone in the light." (caps mine) Those have to be the most challenging words I've read in a long time. Verse 11 goes against everything we think.
We joke that if my kids don't get married soon, we'll have to step in and help God clearly. Well, I'm not joking about that anymore. But it's a good example of how we don't think God is going to do His part, so we might just have to step in and find spouses for them off some bridal website. Wrong. Better to live as a single person than marry the wrong one.
Working this out in a difficult marriage is still easier on paper than in real life. Walking in darkness with God is still going to be hard, but as the verses earlier in the chapter state, "Is my hand shortened, that it cannot redeem? Or have I no power to deliver?"
This chapter in Isaiah has now given me more courage than ever to walk alongside people in darkness in a whole new way. I won't be afraid or have doubts deep down anymore when I advise them to trust in God in the darkness. The darkness is where He wants us sometimes. Darkness with God can be a good thing. It doesn't say "if" you walk in darkness " it says, "let him who walks in darkness". That sounds to me like you're going to have times of darkness, times of no light.
We've all seen people who didn't wait for God to redeems their stories and now they are suffering the consequences of those choices, but even then, even in those situations where they kindled their own torches, God can still redeem them....if they come to their senses and if they repent and confess. Isaiah says, "Morning by morning he awakens; he awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught. The Lord has opened my ear, and I was not rebellious; I turned not backward." Awaken my ears morning by morning. Open my own ears. Help me not to light my own fire, but instead to wait in the times of darkness and to keep encouraging those in darkness to not give up.
It's Isaiah 50:10 and 11, "Who among you fears the Lord and obeys the voice of his servant? Let him who walks in darkness and has no light trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God. Behold, all you who kindle a fire, who equip yourselves with burning torches! Walk by the light of your fire, and by the torches that you have kindled! This you have from my hand: you shall lie down in torment."
I was rather confused at verse 11 at first until I read the commentary on it that followed. It basically described how this is a "solemn warning to those who walk in darkness and who try to help themselves find the light." These are people like Abraham and Sarah who were promised a son, but that son didn't come for 25 years!!!! So, Abraham felt like he needed to step in and help God because clearly he'd been forgotten and God must need some help....wrong......!! The amazing thing is that God doesn't stop him!!! He doesn't stop Hagar from getting pregnant. He doesn't send a messenger to warn him that that was a bad idea. He lets Abraham "kindle a fire" and that's where the verse suddenly became clear. These people who make "fire", their own light, so to speak, equipping themselves "with burning torches" will end up lying down "in torment". In other words, there will be consequences for not waiting on God, not letting God work, in HIS TIME, not our's.
This is how we do this. We "try to help ourselves", the devotional says. "We seek the light of the natural way and the advice of our friends. We reason out our own conclusions and thereby may be tempted to accept a path of deliverance that would not be of God at all." But these are always the wrong path. The light is bright, sure, but it isn't God's light. They are "deceptive beacons leading us toward the danger of the rocks." And this is the scary part, "God will allow us to walk in the false light of those sparks, but the end will be sorrow."
I have had multiple friends now in rough marriages and these are Christian marriages, at least where the wife is a believer. Most of the women have done the right thing, and by God's grace, have stayed together. They have stayed the path of faithfulness, of literally walking in darkness, never knowing if the husband will ever be saved, never knowing if they'll have the dream marriage they long for. I marvel at this kind of strength as marriage is really hard even if both are saved! How they do this is only supernatural. But the amazing fruit coming out of their faithfulness is incredible - children who love the Lord, who are following God's way all because of the willingness of the Mom to trust God in her darkness.
I've always advised staying together, always. I've encouraged periods of separation to work things out, but I've never advised divorce. I've encouraged getting outside help, but never leaving permanently. I've been told, "You have no idea." I know. I don't. I've been told, "You wouldn't understand." I haven't claimed to. All I have is the Bible and I only know what I know, what I read in it. I believe the promises. But, there's always been this part of me that really doesn't know their pain and so I understand that it must be harder than I could ever imagine. I've tried even then to encourage a deep faith in God, even though they are in the midst of what seems like torture probably.
But this verse was a real challenge to me and the devotional went on, "Beloved, never try to get out of a dark place except in God's timing and in His way. A time of trouble and darkness is meant to teach you lessons you desperately need. Premature deliverance may circumvent God's work of grace in your life. Commit the entire situation to Him and BE WILLING TO ABIDE IN DARKNESS, knowing He is present. Remember it is better to walk in the dark with God than to walk alone in the light." (caps mine) Those have to be the most challenging words I've read in a long time. Verse 11 goes against everything we think.
We joke that if my kids don't get married soon, we'll have to step in and help God clearly. Well, I'm not joking about that anymore. But it's a good example of how we don't think God is going to do His part, so we might just have to step in and find spouses for them off some bridal website. Wrong. Better to live as a single person than marry the wrong one.
Working this out in a difficult marriage is still easier on paper than in real life. Walking in darkness with God is still going to be hard, but as the verses earlier in the chapter state, "Is my hand shortened, that it cannot redeem? Or have I no power to deliver?"
This chapter in Isaiah has now given me more courage than ever to walk alongside people in darkness in a whole new way. I won't be afraid or have doubts deep down anymore when I advise them to trust in God in the darkness. The darkness is where He wants us sometimes. Darkness with God can be a good thing. It doesn't say "if" you walk in darkness " it says, "let him who walks in darkness". That sounds to me like you're going to have times of darkness, times of no light.
We've all seen people who didn't wait for God to redeems their stories and now they are suffering the consequences of those choices, but even then, even in those situations where they kindled their own torches, God can still redeem them....if they come to their senses and if they repent and confess. Isaiah says, "Morning by morning he awakens; he awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught. The Lord has opened my ear, and I was not rebellious; I turned not backward." Awaken my ears morning by morning. Open my own ears. Help me not to light my own fire, but instead to wait in the times of darkness and to keep encouraging those in darkness to not give up.
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