Wednesday 31 May 2017

Not Mine, but His

I never used to think getting up at the crack of dawn would be considered relaxing, but now I do.  I was telling my bff cousin last night...all has changed...which is why I hardly get to blog anymore. Before, I had my own little "me time" routine....I woke up, worked out, read my Bible, drank my coffee, put in some laundry, had a shower....Then, RM, would come down, we would chat together, more coffee...then, slowly the kids would come down and the day would officially start.  Now...I'm up, still early, but no time to exercise (now I have to wait until the kids are gone to work), no time to read the Bible or blog...I have to quickly whip up some lunches for 3 people, quickly whip up some breakfasts, and then rush them out the door.  I would normally have a chance to write after all this, but not with the computer being in use all the time for my son's course....  The only way for me to get all that I used to get done is to get up even earlier which has been hard as the days are so full I'm needing the extra hour of sleep!  Who knew that full-time summer jobs would add so much activity to my mornings!?

I can't begin to catch up on all that I've wanted to blog about.  I'll just start with mentioning a couple of summer blessings.  These are blessings that will not seem huge, but to me have already added so much to our summer.  First....about a year ago my sons were exposed to ripsticks.  These are basically skateboards.  My son, who was only 5 at the time, is incredibly adept at these things.  My older son, who was 9, then, was also very adept.  A friend ended up leaving them at the house by accident for a week and in that week my kids became even more adept and they wanted to have one for themselves. Wasn't going to happen.  We are still tight and making up for two years of financial drought.  It wasn't a priority.  They got all computer savvy and started looking on-line for deals.  They found a few that were within 45 minutes....ok....we'd think about it.  Meanwhile, my mom heard my son mentioning these ripsticks and texted my nephew knowing he and his brother had a couple that they used to use....were they done with them?  These aren't cheap.  I didn't want to assume that my nephews would just give them away...

Months passed, nearly a year.  The ripstick fad faded and was mostly forgotten.  I had thought of maybe surprising my son for his birthday in June and buying a used one on-line, but that was assuming there would still be a good deal.  Then, a few weeks ago, my sister, out-of-the-blue, asked if she could come by...with not, one, but her two ripsticks.  Had my nephew mentioned that text to her so many months ago and had she just noticed they weren't being used anymore?.....who knows.  All I know is that she pulled up into our driveway with two ripsticks (just one around here would be ridiculous, but I would have been happy with one!)  My sons went nuts.  This is the funny part though...we have only a small pad of concrete on our whole 47 acres to even use the ripstick.  So guess where they started practicing....around the kitchen table....in the house....especially when it was still cold and rainy!  Dumpy farmhouses are good for something!  Now, if we want to use them we go to a park or a gym and then it's super fun.  The boys are experts now in just a matter of a few weeks. We did stop and thank God.  We really did.  How is it that He even cares about little things like that? He knew I would probably never go and buy one, so He had it delivered to me, right to my door.  For free.  Such a great little "boy blessing".

I got a great Mommy blessing, too, recently.  Every year, I splurge and buy a few annuals for pots on the patio.  I would buy tons and tons if I could, I just love the way flowers make any area that is normally drab, suddenly become so beautiful.  Last year was my patio "makeover".  I found all sorts of old bushel apple containers, some old barrels, more wine crates, etc.  That made my normally unattractive entry way a little nicer.  This year, I found even more containers and started to hang things on the side of the house.  I kept my normal amount of annuals and left it at that.  However, I started to heavily hint to the kids, "If there are ever deals at the greenhouse, let me know!"  "No deals, Mom."  But then, one day, my son was at work and he was told to throw out all sorts of flowers that were considered "too tall" or "overgrown".  He sensed an opportunity and said, "Can I take them home?"  "Sure."  He filled up the back of the truck twice with flat after flat of begonias.  I had so many flowers I didn't even know where to plant them.  I had to go back to my stash of old containers and try to find some more.  Now, it looks like I'm planning a wedding.  At one point, the patio was so covered in flats of flowers we could hardly find a path to the door.  Oddly enough, they are in the same colour scheme as my wedding flowers so it does look like wedding decor, but I love it.  My patio has had yet another makeover and this one, too, was free.  Again, may be a small blessing, but I consider it huge!

Last but not least...we got word that our road is going to be resurfaced!  That is big news!  Many people who drive to my house have mentioned, "It's too bad about your road....."  It is so full of potholes it is dangerous for any car and makes it like an obstacle course as you weave around those things that took out my neighbour's wheel last year.  The damage was bad!  I figured it helped slow traffic down a little, so I never complained or called the town to fix it.  However, as for curb appeal, it wasn't helping our house value to have it in such bad shape.  We got the road info last week and to my shock and awe, it was resurfaced two days ago!  So far, just the gravel is on...sure hoping more is to come, but even if they stopped at just the gravel, it already looks better.  It, too, may seem like a small thing, but this is the best part....though we pay our taxes, it feels like it's free!  I feel like it is a massive improvement to our home without us having to do anything ourselves.  I really consider it a blessing as well.

I think what all of these things are telling me is that God can do what He wants to do and when He wants to do them.  He can bless us with big things or small things.  I find I can be the most discontent person, but then these blessings remind me I don't have to worry about a thing, what I will wear or what I will eat or even what toys my kids will have, what my house will look like or even my road. God knows everything I need and even the little things I want.  My kids are learning these lessons, too.

Oh, there's more....being Spring, there is lots of new life on the farm....we've got bunnies coming out of our ears, more kittens on the way, a new calf.  We're now hoping for puppies as well.  Our male collie seemed to miss the mark last time.  We learned yesterday (this is funny...), at the doggie fertility clinic (did you know those existed????) that collies have a hard time getting bred.  So with a little help from this clinic and another breeder we are now hoping that she will be pregnant as soon as this week which will mean puppies mid-summer, all going well.  The reason I share this is because it is another amazing life lesson for our kids, specifically for my son who bought the collie.  We bring everything before the Lord, even our dog's womb.  As we drove up to drop the female collie off at her new husband's kennel, my son just kept saying, "She's not my dog.  She's God's dog.  I'm just taking care of her." That statement was such a good reminder for me!  I'm not taking care of my kids, they're God's kids! He knows what they need more than I do.  If He thinks they need a new toy, He'll deliver it to their door, which He did.  It isn't my house, it's God's house.  If He thinks I need flowers, He'll deliver them to my door..and He did!  It's not my road, it's God's road.  I don't need to worry about the potholes.  God will take care of it...and now it's done.  God is in charge of everything.  I am merely the caretaker, managing the things He's given me.  I own none of it.  There is such a release, such freedom when I consider my kids, my home, all the things I try to control, as not mine, but His.

Tuesday 23 May 2017

Going into the Deep to See all the Fish

We have a new and different life now that RM is working regular hours.  This has been quite the adjustment, but now we have an even different new life now that our older 3 are also working full-time regular hours.  Who knew how much you relied on certain kids until they are no longer around and available!?  Our life literally changed again, literally overnight and we didn't like it!

This weekend was a great example. We had a garden to put in and we were planning on having the whole family be a part of that.  It was not to be.  The older kids worked all weekend.  They actually woke up at 3 in the morning yesterday to be at work for 4 am in order to help the owner out on his busiest day.  Fortunately, they were home by noon, but they were no good to anyone - they went back to bed!!!!

RM and I ended up putting in the garden, at least some of it, on our own!  Super marriage enrichment, but sad that the older ones couldn't help.  The year before it was all done on one day because each child helped so much!

I shouldn't complain though.  We are actually very grateful.  Grateful for the work for the kids. Grateful for what it is teaching them about working hard.  Grateful for the income it is bringing them. Grateful on so many levels.  It is also requiring us to step it up with the younger kids.  Now, they are being asked to pick up the slack around home on a new level.  They aren't used to this, but when we look back, we required a lot more of the older kids at the same ages, so we're actually being forced to train them the way the older ones were trained.

Life happens so fast.  It never stays the same.  There are aspects of that that I love and really fight.  I think deep down and I would have loved the older ones to stay the ages they are, live at home forever and help forever.  The younger ones would also stay the same ages.  They might help, too, but they would have to stay cute and funny and try to just play all day.  It sadly isn't like that!  But it doesn't have to be sad.  I think there is a moment of "grief" where you realize your life isn't the same and never will be, but then it can move on to embracing the new life, being grateful for the new season and all that that entails.  That's kind of where I'm at...a little sad, but able to see the good.

Back to the garden.  We went a little overboard this year.  I don't really know what we were thinking. It just kind of happened.  All I know is it is HUGE.  Bigger than last year, way bigger.  We have boatloads of tomato and pepper plants in there.  The only thing I can think of is that maybe we'll sell some at the side of the road this summer and if not...perhaps I'll be doing more canning than I've ever done?????

The conclusion.  Having a large family has been so great.  It has taught us so much and it has forced us into things, like huge gardens, having the kids always move into new stages of life, that we never would have done or ever learned.  In Luke 5, Jesus tells Peter to throw his net "into the deep".  He doesn't believe it will help as he had already fished all night, possibly in the same spot, who knows, but he has just enough faith to trust Him and says, ..."But at your word I will let down the nets." That's kind of how it's been all along with our family.  God keeps asking me to go out into the deep.  I think, "I'm deep enough!" But I have just enough faith to trust Him with the next thing He's asking me to do or to go through, so I say, "Ok....at your word, I'll let down the nets", but there's just this little bit of doubt, "Will I make it?"  But then, with Peter, the nets break, there are so many fish.  He was ashamed of his lack of faith. That is how it is with me, too.  With every new stage of our family, with every new trial their new ages bring, with all the new changes with RM's job, I see all the "fish" that are coming in.  My nets are breaking.  I'm like Peter.  How did I ever doubt?  Maybe that's why these specific stories are included, just so we see the human side of the disciples.  The ones who actually walked alongside Jesus and still doubted Him.

Of course, just like Peter, I'll be forgetful.  I do that a lot.  But maybe less forgetful as life goes on. I try so hard to pass these life lessons on to my kids and they are now the ones navigating their own lives.  A funny example....my daughter wasn't sure how she would earn the money for a car, then this job came up.  Once she got there, she was able to meet some people who found out she was a piano teacher, too.  Next thing you know, she has 2 more piano students!  God is taking care of her even well into the Fall!  She was needing more students, God knew that...her net is breaking.  Meanwhile, my son, who is nearly done his course and has struggled through it and has been so worried, is now doing so well in his course.  His nets are breaking, too.

You really have to go "into the deep"in order to see all the fish.  That involves risk and a much greater level of faith, but I want my nets to break, so I'm much more willing to take that risk now.  I've seen the pattern over and over in my life and I realize how it is worth it to take Jesus at His word when He tells me to go.

Thursday 18 May 2017

Building the Ark Before it Rains

We sat around yesterday morning before we started school, as we do every morning, and read once again more of the story of Joseph.  It seems like we are often in that part of the Bible.  It reminded me of all the posts I've written about being in prison or in the pit like Joseph.  What struck me yesterday was how long it was before he was able to see his brothers again after all they had done to him.  It was also such a long time before he was able to see the fulfillment of the dreams he had been given so many years earlier.

That reminded me of another thing I had read while away the week before.  It may seem like an unlikely book for me to read, but it was on the shelf of the condo we were in and I've heard this man's name so many times, but didn't know much about him so I picked it up and read as much as I could before we left.  It was called The Warren Buffet Way.  Funny, I know.  I actually found I really enjoyed it! It had biographical parts to it, not just about investing, so that made it a little more interesting.  One thing he said jumped off the page to me, with respect to investing wisely, "Noah didn't wait for the rain to start building the ark."

Believe it or not, these two things are tied together.  Joseph and Noah.  Just as it took years for Joseph to see the fulfillment of his dreams, it also took years before Noah saw the rain.  Yet both were required to be faithful in the meantime.  As the kids and I talked about this idea, other names came to mind from the Bible who also had to wait, Abraham, Sarah....it seems to be a regularly occurring theme, this waiting thing, being faithful....

We have longed for our kids to have good paying jobs for a long time.  We wanted them to be able to put money away regularly so that they could one day buy their own cars and even their own houses. They've had odd jobs here and there over the years, but really, my daughter who teaches piano and also at a co-op, was really the only one with a regular income and that wasn't enough to get a car and save lots.  We prayed about this a lot.  We were also kind of picky.  We didn't want them to be in an environment that was dangerous or could be a dark influence.  So many jobs can be the undoing of someone's faith because of the influences of the other co-workers.  We wanted to make sure it was a positive, healthy environment, ideally.  Was that too much to ask?

Our kids put in application after application to certain places we thought would suit them, were close to home, etc., but time and time again, it just wouldn't work out for a variety of reasons.  How can you save money for a car and one day a house if you don't have work.  I was frustrated for them. They were frustrated!

One day, I casually mentioned  that my kids were looking for work to my friend, as I'm always their biggest advocate, and she said, "I'll ask my friend whose dad has a greenhouse."  Within a few days, my kids were called, interviewed and hired, just like that.  When my daughter saw how easy that was, she said, "Can I work, too?"  I asked the owner and he said, "Have her call me."  Next thing you know, she's working, too.  Suddenly, my older 3 kids have work and lots of it, as much as they want. This may not seem like a big deal, but it's so great, and this is what I was trying to tell them with respect to Noah and Joseph.  Now that the money is coming in, there will be huge temptations to spend it.  That's what I did at their age.  I tried to remind them of what it must have been like to be Noah's kids.  Noah probably went up to them and said, "Hey, I need your help building a boat because it is going to rain in who knows how many years, what do you say?  Can I count on your help?"  They probably thought their dad was bonkers, but then again, maybe they didn't think like that at all.  Maybe, just maybe, they knew their dad's faith was strong and that he had a walk with God and maybe, they didn't ever question him, they just said, "Sure, Dad," and went to work.  Yesterday, I asked them to believe me.  I asked them to trust me.  I told them the Warren Buffet quote about building the ark before it rained.  I begged them to put their money away and to even invest it so that one day, years from now, they would have so much money saved that they'd be able to not only have a car, but a house.

This job is a miracle for so many reasons.  We love that it is fairly close by.  We love that all the kids can drive together.  They all have a great relationship, the boys in particular.  This allows them to work together, too, which they love.  Working together is also always that much better as family watches your back more than non-family.  It is a great environment in that they are surrounded by plants!  It is a family-run business and they have a great work ethic.  His own children are involved in it and our kids are witnessing a bunch of kids working for their dad, just as they have for thier dad for years.

How is that related to Joseph?  I just saw the fact that we don't always see when things will work out. It seemed like this job thing just wasn't coming together.  I really had to trust God for His timing.  He knew they needed work.  He knew they needed an income.  He knew they wanted to start off in life by being ahead financially not behind.  Now they have university to pay for, piano tuition, cars and houses to buy....it wasn't going to be coming from us!  With Joseph, all God wanted was that he would remain faithful where he was.  God was with him all along.  I knew that in my head, but once in a while, those doubts would creep in.  This week as we've reflected on the work they have now, we are amazed at God's goodness to them.  We can be so grateful for all the other jobs they didn't get. Who knows what God was protecting them from?

It's just such another great example of trusting our kids to the Lord, even the jobs they need, and waiting on His timing for them.  It sometimes takes years before we see the fulfillment of His plans for them.  We had prayed many times about work.  God always knew what He had in mind.  We just had to keep being faithful where we were.

Friday 12 May 2017

Not of Fear

We are all back safe and sound from a wonderful few days away.  I was amazed to come back to a very clean and tidy house, thanks to my oldest rallying the troops while I was away.  My husband had a couple days off work while I was gone so he was there to watch our 8 as well as a couple others from our other "family" (we see them so often now that they call me their other mom, he's their other dad and they are our other kids!), so he had 10 on his own.  Interesting experience, needless to say! The 4 older ones were at the homeschool conference for the weekend, so that made the house a little quieter, though it took some of the help away, but he managed to do fine and the 6 year old tried to run away only once!

Going away is always such a good time to get to know one another on a new and deeper level.  Being just women, (mom, sisters, and sister-in-law) we definitely spend more time talking than say a bunch of guys.  We turned off the TV and just shared what was going on in our lives and then we prayed for one another.  Being all believers that makes the time even that much more significant.  We also shared our greatest fears, dreams and hopes for the future.

I shared how one of my greatest fears has definitely been for my children.  I shared in a different post how I feared for my son getting into university, but he made it, and I knew God was teaching me to trust Him, but I also knew something else would try to take me down in my faith.   Well, I guess fear begets fear.  I've noticed recently that my son has shown that he, too, has fears, but they only show up when he takes tests!  In his math assignments he gets high 90's, but then when he takes his test, he doesn't do nearly as well.  The test atmosphere makes him very nervous and all the math concepts he thinks are solidified in his mind go out the window.  This also happened when he went to take his driver's test.  He had been driving and driving completely fine with me for weeks and months, but then on the day of the test he was so nervous he made a small mistake and it cost him his license.  He was so disappointed!

On the final day of the trip, as we were heading out, I shared with the girls about my son.  I asked for prayer for him, that he would be able to get over his nerves and pass the upcoming driver's test.  Just like when his university acceptance came, it gave all of us a huge boost of confidence, I knew he, and all of us, needed this.  Another point of prayer for sure.

A couple nights ago, right before the test, I remembered a verse.  I quickly looked it up and shared it with the kids on my first morning back.  It was in 2 Timothy, "...for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self control."  When I shared that with the kids, one of them said, "Hey, where is that?"  "Timothy," I said.  "We just heard about that on the weekend at OCHEC!"  "Really?" I said.  "What did they share?"  My daughter then went on to say how the speaker spoke about how Paul knew his young friend Timothy was afraid, so he specifically wrote that letter to him to encourage him.  My other daughter later added, Paul knew Timothy had 3 main weaknesses.  He was young, fearful and weak.  It was so great to think about that book in those terms.  Here was my son, young, fearful and feeling weak.  Yet God knew he was feeling that way and He had these verses of encouragement just for him.  I then went back and read the passages surrounding that verse on fear.

Paul said, "I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day."  If Paul prayed, I can pray, and I can get others to pray.  He would have been praying as he knew how Timothy must have needed prayer.  At first I wasn't going to share my requests with my family as I didn't want my son to feel badly, but then I thought, "That's exactly what Satan would want...keep my requests in the dark...." So I shared.

Paul goes on, "I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure dwells in you as well."  I could add to that that my son not only has a faith in his grandmother, but also in his grandfather, and also in his great grandmother, his great grandfather, in his aunts and uncles, brothers and sisters....I could go on and on...he has generations of faithfulness way before he existed, who prayed for him before they met him!  He has people praying for him now who care for him so deeply and, just like Paul wrote to Timothy about his faith, and says, "I am sure", I can say that, too, "I am sure" that my son has a faith dwelling in him as well.

Then Paul says, in light of that faith that dwells in you, "For that reasons, I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands...."

Maybe Timothy forgot that he had generations before him who prayed for him and who were women of great faith.  Paul had to remind him.  He had to remind him of the gift of God that was in him.  He needed to fan into flames that gift.  I guess he had laid hands on him before as a symbol of the faith that was in him.

We read those verses together as a family that night.  I wanted to encourage my son and my daughter as well who is taking a big piano history exam today, that they need not be fearful, but have the spirit of power and love.  So then, in the spirit of Paul, I suggested our two older kids come and sit in the middle of the family room on the bench so we could lay hands on them as a family, praying this spirit of power into them.  They willingly did so and then we had such a beautiful time of prayer for them.

The next morning I woke up to take my son to his driver test.  Normally I am quite nervous and my stomach gets uneasy, but this time I wasn't.  I asked myself,  "Why am I not nervous?" and the words from the Chris Tomlin version of "Amazing Grace" came into my head....."My chains fell off, I've been set free"....that was cool!  I sang the rest of that verse all morning.

As we drove to the test center, I shared that with my son and he said, "I had 'Victory in Jesus' in my head all day!"  So he'd also been singing songs of victory!  My other son came along for moral support that day which was nice.  We prayed once again before he went off to take his test.  When my son first failed his test, he questioned why, but we realized over the course of time that our identity as a man cannot come from man.  He had been humbled through this experience and others like it this past year and he had finally come to the point where it didn't even matter if he failed again.  He knew, if he failed, "No big deal, I'll just take it again."  His identity was no longer coming from awards, or passing grades, or even driver's licenses.   Being humbled in that way was the worst thing and the greatest thing that could have happened to him because it stripped him of all the things he valued.  He had been getting his worth from external rewards not internal.  His confidence was no longer shattered as it had been. He knew, pass or fail, he was a child of God and it showed.

I should have still been completely fine, but once he left for his driver's test, I admit, my nerves were shot.  I texted everyone I could think of to pray.  The test took a long time!!!!!  But I started getting people sending me verses, prayers, encouragements...it helped me so much!

Finally, the car pulled in....I couldn't tell what his expression was.  Then, out he came, with a victory whoop!  We ran over and hugged him in the parking lot.  I even hugged the instructor!  She looked at me a little weirdly!  I explained this wasn't his first test and she said, "Oh, it shows on the test that it is...."  I wondered if that was a godly oversight so he wouldn't be judged too harshly...who knows. Anyway, I think she got a kick out of this poor boy's excited mother and brother....

The great news went out like wild fire and everyone was excited.  Such a small thing in the big picture, but huge in the life of a mom.  Another victory under his belt and another test of faith passed. It is taking me so many hard lessons to learn these truths from Scripture.  I wish I could just read about how to pass them instead of have to go through them, but it just doesn't work that way.  I can look back now and be grateful for my son's tough time instead of wishing he hadn't had to go through it.  I can see how God uses all these experiences to grow us in our character.  He loves us too much to keep us where we are.

Thursday 4 May 2017

Remembering God's Goodness so We Won't Forget

My friend who is going through this difficult season writes things down all the time, but only for the court.  I keep encouraging her to write the amazing stories that are happening in her life so that she won't forget that she wasn't forgotten.  She's way too overwhelmed for that.  So, guess who's job it is?!  Mine!  She's given me permission to share....

This past winter when she had nowhere to stay, a kind Christian woman who didn't know her and had never met her, offered her cabin to this large busy family - for free.  That was amazing in itself.  It was situated on a beautiful lake with a beautiful view.  If she was going to be stuck in the middle of nowhere, at least she had something nice to look at each morning!

However, over the course of the looong winter and with 7 kids, (including 4 boys under 11), things got a little worn down, sometimes even broken, or written on or, uh, destroyed.....Fortunately, a kind neighbour that lived in a cabin nearby helped out for the dire emergencies like clogged sinks or toilets.  But then, the time was coming when she was going to have to be out of this cabin and back into her own trailer that was situated in a trailer park/campground nearby.  How was she going to get the cabin back into some semblance of order with all those kids underfoot?  How was she going to fix all the things that had gotten damaged?  A miracle was needed and a miracle she got.

Another friend of her's who has also walked this difficult path with her told her small group at church what was going on in this lady's life.  Their suggestion?  Go up and help put the cabin back together for her!  Unbelievable.  They had also never met her and had only heard of her story through this one lady.  The power of Christian fellowship is all I could think of.

The one lady who lived down here near me drove the 3 hours to my friend's cabin to make a list of all the things she would need to buy and to go through the entire cabin, room by room, to see what would need to be done.  Talk about organized.  This lady is such a good example of putting your spiritual gifts to work.  Then she came back, bought everything she would need for the following weekend. She then proceeded to go to her small group with a list for each person and their personal assignments.  These things included painting walls, fixing baseboards, broken shower rods, massive cleaning of all rooms, behind stoves, fridges, cupboards....you name it, these people did it.  My friend said it was like the Cat in the Hat.  This crew of people came in for 5 hours and left it better than she had found it!  It was amazing!  On top of all that, this lady had brought lunch for her "workers" so my friend didn't have to worry about a single thing.  What a gift to my friend.  She was able to leave the cabin with a clean conscience knowing she had been able to bless the woman who had offered her the cabin in the first place.  I'm sure the woman who owned the cabin walked in amazed to see what good condition it was in despite the large family who had stayed there.

To me, it was such an amazing example of how the Lord uses His people.  They were all literally His hands and feet.  No one was sitting back here in a chair suggesting things that should be done or judging her for how the place had gotten a little "used".  No, they got off their chairs and just like the book I'm currently reading, In His Steps, by Charles Sheldon, they asked themselves, "What would Jesus do?" They knew He would have gone to help.  He wouldn't have sat around making judgments.

A few weeks earlier, she found out, however, she had no trailer to go back to, due to unfortunate circumstances.  She was a wreck.  She felt homeless as she was about to leave the cabin and had all along assumed she'd be able to go back to the trailer that no longer existed.  People prayed, what else could we do?  This time, a very kind and generous uncle stepped in along with a few others and got their finances together to help her purchase a new trailer.  She was dumbfounded how once again, what Satan intended for evil, God intended for good.  Once this whole experience is over, I hope she will be able to see that.  Right now, it is still such an emotional roller coaster that she barely makes it from day to day, but an outsider like me only sees God's hand which is why I'm determined to write it down for her.

Meanwhile, her brother, a believer as well, is down at Bible School in the States.  His group of Bible Study buddies also heard of her horrible living dilemma.  Now keep in mind these are poor little church mice, literally, but that didn't stop them from raising $1000 for her, just because.  She is so overwhelmed by how God is providing for her in this difficult situation.  I'M  amazed myself!  Would I wish this on anyone?  No, yet, to see God moving in this way is something you just don't see everyday and I wonder if she'll say one day, "This awful experience was amazing!"  Isn't that often how it goes?  At least in retrospect?  She's not quite there yet, but I'm sure she'll get there one day, at least that's my prayer.

On a completely different note, I have two adult children in my home now, as of today.  I am so grateful for what God has done in my boy's life this past year.  He'll admit it's been one of the hardest years of his life.  He, just like my daughter, is not super happy about becoming an adult.  Before, it was fun to have a birthday - they liked getting older.  Now, it has hit them....they have to be responsible!  But both of them are embracing this new challenge and I continue to pray God will be gracious to them in their lives as they set the example for the younger ones to come.....

Off to make crepes.....

Wednesday 3 May 2017

Know the Condition of Your Flocks

It was tax time this past week.  RM, who now has no time of his own any more, had to somehow find time to get his taxes done.  Some hate doing their taxes, we actually really love it!  It is an amazing time of reflection as we look back over the year and see where our money went, why it went there, mistakes we may have made, and always, always, it shows us God's great provision.

For the last two years, our taxes have revealed one major thing - we made no money!  How did we survive?  We don't know.  It's no wonder we weren't making a lot of progress on our debt during that time.  Thanks to generous parents, kind siblings, anonymous gifts, frugal living, we made it through. Those dry times were hard.  I'm so grateful to now have regular work for my husband.  So much so that it's a problem now!  They want him working more than full-time!  Interestingly, now that he's there, he's already on the other side of the interview table.  He'll be interviewing two guys today that applied for a job that came up recently.  He cannot believe how many people applied for the job.  He cannot believe how many people won't get the job.  He started to realize, maybe it was the same situation when he applied?  The job he has now is no doubt a gift from God as countless people probably applied, too and countless people probably got turned away.  We just continue to be so grateful.

I can make a Biblical argument for why going through your financial picture is such a good thing to do and that God actually blesses that.  Proverbs 27:23-27 says this, "Know well the condition of your flocks, and give attention to your herds, for riches do not last forever, and does a crown endure to all generations?  When the grass is gone and the new growth appears and the vegetation of the mountains is gathered, the lambs will provide your clothing, and the goats the price of a field.  There will be enough goats' milk for your food, for the food of your household and maintenance for your girls."

We actually have flocks and herds, but most people do not.  So I asked the kids to put that into modern translation and they said things like, "Know where your money is going, know the state of your business."  The Good News Bible says, "wealth is not permanent.  Not even nations last forever."

It seems like there is a condition to this verse.  If you do know the condition of your flocks and you do give attention to your herds  then you will be provided for.  Your "lambs will provide clothing, and the goats the price of a field."  The work you do, be it farming or whatever job you have, will give you what you need.  Not necessarily extravagance, but what you need - clothing, food.  It even mentions that it will give you enough food for your household and for your "girls".  For me, my household has included 12 kids all week, (sometimes 15) 2 adults (sometimes 3).  That's a lot of household!  But we've had enough!  I don't know how it happens, but the food in our fridge stretches, I swear.  I've learned to make really big meals that can last more than one meal.  No one has complained and I'm not actually standing in front of the stove all the time which I also find odd.  Do I have "girls", i.e. cleaning ladies or servants?  Hardly.  But I do have lots of little helpers.  I also have "girls" in the form of washers, dryers, vacuum cleaners, stoves, fridges....things that didn't exist in Bible times which would have been like "girls"!  And the Bible says there will be enough for the "maintenance" of my "girls".  Sure enough, we have them running smoothly (except for the dishwasher, but hopefully that will be up and running soon).

So you can see why doing our taxes isn't drudgery, it's actually a blessing to see how God has provided and taken care of us during the last two years.  All our kids have clothing.  My whole household over the last year where we've housed this large family has been taken care of.  Our house is like a can of sardines.  Right now there are 3 girls asleep on the couch in the family room (it looks like they had a party while I was in bed sleeping).  4 more girls are asleep upstairs.  3 boys in one room, 3 more in another.....it's amazing!

On top of all this, I'm supposed to be heading away.  I have such mixed emotions, leaving my family, spending money that I feel so guilty about (probably all moms feel this way if/when they go away even for an afternoon!), leaving this other family in the lurch, vacationing when I should be here.....how does a mom ever get away without feeling awful?  Yet, it's booked, I'm excited! I'm going and I know it will be great once I'm gone and I know it will be fine while I'm away....but what am I supposed to do with all my emotions?  So I prayed and I prayed.  I needed to pick up a few things for the trip.  I hate spending money, but when your clothes are literally worn out, it was time to pick up a few things.  I didn't want to be a martyr, either....ah, the battle.  I prayed again.....the miracles began.

It began in the car on the ride to the stores.  I turned on the radio and literally caught 5 minutes of a sermon on money.  I actually have this verse underlined in my Bible, "Honour the Lord with your wealth and with the firstfruits of all your produce; then your barns will be filled with plenty, and your vats will be bursting with wine."  (Proverbs 3:9,10)  The preacher said, "This isn't prosperity teaching.  This is simply saying God will provide for you, whatever it is that you need."  He went on to say, "What will that be?  I can't say, but He will give grace to you in whatever form you need it."  I was so encouraged.  Earlier on this week, my mom had encouraged me with those kinds of words in light of the fact we had such a full house.  She said she was always praying for us.  What form of grace was I needing?  I needed grace in my emotions.  Was I allowed to go on this trip?  If so, God needed to show me through His "graces".

First "grace"....the last time we went I was the only turkey with a carry on bag that you actually "carry".  We went through what seemed like miles of airport walking.  Everyone else had their cute little roller suitcases, but not me.  My arm was so sore by the time I got on the airplane.  So I asked my mom if she had an extra one.  I knew I couldn't go out and buy one, those are so expensive!  But then, as I went out yesterday to pick up a few things, a thought came into my head to go to the local thrift store down the street.  Nah, they won't have one, I thought, but then I also wondered why the thought had gone into my head in the first place...hmmmmm....sure enough, I walked in and saw several almost the second I walked in.  These things price out to be as much as $275 new.  My suitcase?  $3.  Yup.  3 bucks.  I walked out of there so happy!!!!  I'll be rolling through the airport with my new "wheelie" suitcase!

Next, I went towards a mall.  I hate malls.  Hate, hate, hate.  So much walking, so much distraction, so much overspending, so much to be tempted by.  I was determined to go to one store only and somehow hoped to find all the things I needed in there.  But as I drove, I went by a Value Village.  I groaned.  Was I supposed to shop there instead?  Fine, fine, fine.  I decided to turn in and give it a chance.  In some ways it is way easier to shop in one store like that than a huge mall.  I quickly went through all the racks, picked a ton of things to try on and picked a few things I liked, quite a few things actually.  I was amazed because they all seemed brand new.  I think that happens a lot in those thrift stores.  I got to the cashier hoping she would say, "Everything is 50% off!"  She didn't.  I showed her my cards from the store, also hoping for some major discount. No luck.  After she added it all up, she turned to me and said, "I'm going to fill out this card for you today and you'll get your entire purchase at 30% off."  That was a huge savings!  For all the things I got, I couldn't believe it.  I thanked her profusely for her kindness to me....and I thanked God, another grace.

Next stop, the mall.  I only needed flip flops and a new pair of sandals.  I was determined to not be distracted by anything else.  Nothing jumped out at me, except for a randam pair of sandals lying on the ground near some other sandals.  No price, no other shoes to compare them to.  They were my exact size.  I took them to the cashier and joked with her, "2 for $7?" as I had one pair of flip flops which were supposed to be 2 for $7, but the other sandals I picked up were leather.  There's no way they would have been that price.  The lowest prices for other leather sandals in the store was $24-$29. I know those are still good prices, but I was looking for a deal!  She couldn't find the price anywhere so they had to look on line - $29.  Ooooooh, I didn't love that price.  She said, "Don't worry.  This will work in your favour.  When we don't find a price in the store and they are from an on-line return, you get them for 90% OFF."  I had to get her to repeat that.  90% off!?  Was she joking?  My two pairs of shoes came to less than $9.  I couldn't believe it.....again, more grace!

Finally, I had to get an alarm clock for my son.  The sales person and I looked and looked at all the clocks.  I was hemming and hawing.  Finally she said, "I can give you a deal."  It wasn't 90% this time, but it was still a nice discount.  She didn't have to do that.  And who does that in a mall?!  You aren't supposed to be able to negotiate prices in a mall!

I walked out of that mall amazed.  I felt God had been with me in each purchase.  He had oddly blessed my time in each store.  I felt a strange sense of peace about the trip after that.  I feel like I can actually look forward to going without the heaviness that had been there.  It all ties in with the previous verses at the beginning of the post.  He had provided for me the clothes I needed, right down to the footwear...nothing extravagant, just what I needed.  

Tuesday 2 May 2017

Parents, Birthdays and Keeping Our Lips on our Face!

This past week both my parents turned another year older.  Both are doing well and in good health, including my Dad who just recently had hip surgery.  I read in Proverbs yesterday, "Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old....Let your father and mother be glad; let her who bore you rejoice."  I realize not everyone can live out these verses very easily if they've had a poor relationship and negative experience as a child.  For me, however, this is quite an easy verse for me to live out.

My parents are easy to listen to and it would be unthinkable to despise them.  I'm about to head away for a few days with my mom, sisters, and sister-in-law to warmer climes and I cannot think of anyone I'd rather spend time with.  When we were choosing a place to live, we absolutely considered, "Where are Mom and Dad?"  We definitely didn't want to be far away from them, but not because of childcare, just because we enjoy them!  We did this trip a couple of years ago, too, and the reason it is all possible is because Dad insists on it.  He knows the value of relationships, always has, and he'll do whatever it takes to make good relationships happen.  This is something he has instilled in me and modeled for our kids.

Birthdays are just a good time to stop and reflect and appreciate those around us.  I'm very grateful to have my parents in our lives.

We also celebrated my littlest's birthday this week. He turned 5.  We dreaded that day so much.  We were so sad that he was out of his little years and into the "big boy" years.  He woke up and we shouted, "Happy Birthday!"  He said, "Now I'm not cute!'  So sad!!!  He even knows it!!!  But, of course he is still super cute and we love him to death.  My oldest boy will be 18 this week, too.  So many birthday celebrations!  Talk about extremes - one no longer cute and one becoming handsome. On top of that we celebrated our "other family", too.  Our friends who are in the midst of a marriage trial come most weekends and we are their party when their kids have birthdays, too, so it feels like there is always a party going on here.  Everyone loves it though!

Meanwhile, I'm still trying to keep sibling arguments at bay and keep some peace in the home with all these extra people around.  Yesterday, still in Proverbs, I read a great verse and I must have used it all day long, "A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating."  We talked for a long time about what a fool does and how he acts in the morning.  Then, we went to start school, but my little boys stayed and played without following (first mistake).  Immediately my 6 year old said to the 5 year old, "That's not cool at all!"  as he watched his brother make his new monster truck make a big jump (i.e. foolish thing to say).  Then, the 5 year old, armed with a new car track, picked it up and whacked his brother in the arm.  Tears and screams followed.  I ran in and said, "What happened?!" The crying 6 year old said, "I told him his jump wasn't cool at all and then he hit me!"  I just stopped and almost laughed out loud.  "Didn't we just read about how the fool's lip walk into a fight?  That is what happened here.  Your lips jumped off your face and ran over to your brother.  You asked for a beating!"  Hmmmmm....how did Proverbs know that was going to be my new verse for the day?! Needless to say, I repeated it countless times, "Keep your lips on your face!"  Love Proverbs!

I rarely get the computer these days now as my son is using it for school first thing in the morning, so I'll have to stop here.....life is full....