I'm starting to see the patterns now that we've been at this for over a year and a half. Last year at tax time, I sure the exact same thing happened. My husband has been locked in his office often working late into the night to get his taxes done and out of the way so he can focus on his other projects. Then, the next morning, he usually gives me a financial snapshot of what is going on. Though, some progress had been made, it seemed to me we were in the same boat as we were when we started. I, who write on fighting discouragement, etc. fell yet again. It was only looking back a little later that I realized, "Hey, I bet this happened the exact same time in the exact same way last year! I'm an idiot! How did I not see that coming?!" But it happened. Lesson #6? STAND GUARD FOR THE ENEMY WHO PROWLS AROUND LIKE A LION SEEKING TO DESTROY.
What made me realize this was talking to my other friend on the Lent journey. She had talked to what I shall call a "toxic" friend. She shared with her that she is going to fight for her marriage and even try to win him back. This toxic friend gave her such a tongue-lashing on why she would basically be a fool for doing so. I might add this friend is now divorced. I told my other friend, "It didn't work so well for her, did it? She wants to bring you down with her! She wants you to be as miserable as she is! Run away from her! Don't listen to her!" As I spoke with her, I realized that both she and I had had very similar experiences, similar attacks, but perfectly suited to us - both our areas of vulnerability were hit - square on. We were able to encourage one another, reload our artillery and the next time, we'd be ready. Lesson #7? Do not stop encouraging one another......
The same day of my personal attack, my husband got his. It's almost laughable, but it's also SUPER ANNOYING!!! We had just received the insurance cheque last week and were quite happy to be done with all that awful paperwork and inconvenience and then yesterday, he found himself in a parking lot, just minding his own business, when all of a sudden, you guessed it, he got clocked on his tail bumper by one very aggressive female driver trying to take his parking spot that he was backing out of. She was so determined to take the spot from a patient driver #1, who had been giving RM lots of space, signal light on, etc., and had been there way before this other driver #2, that she scooted in, driving around my husband, who was still in the process of backing up. She turned so quickly in her aggressiveness that not only did she hit the back of my husband's truck, but also the front of patient driver #1's van who never had a chance of getting in. She got the spot, but at what cost? My husband tells me he never knew women could swear so much as both drivers got out and had quite the yelling match apparently. The nervy driver #1 came up to RM and said, "I was just trying to get my spot!" He looked at her and, with a very stern voice that was barely under control, said, "I don't want to hear anything from you. Give me your insurance papers." I think he wanted to bop her one, but, thank goodness he didn't. He came home just shaking his head.
On top of all this, there will be no cheque as we had hoped this week and possibly not for two more weeks. The accounting people up in this (mysterious blackhole) office claim the process didn't get started soon enough (not our fault) and so they're (not) sorry, but there's nothing (don't believe it) that they can do. This leaves us in a very, uh, interesting position, but it's not like we haven't been here before!
On the bright side, my books arrived in time for the seminar, whew! I thought I would be out of luck in that area, so I'm grateful for that. And, on another positive note, I'd been really praying about what to do for my nephew whose birthday is tomorrow. I know this is pride, but I hate looking cheap and poor! I wanted to give him something that he would like and I didn't want to give him junk. We have a deal with other friends, that we basically only make stuff or give second hand stuff, but with sisters, I don't know, it just seems harder to do that. So I prayed and I even prayed with the kids! Then, out of the blue yesterday (talk about last minute as we're seeing him today!) I got an email from the drug store telling me I had enough points to get an itunes card for free! That's it! This boy loves stuff like that! It wasn't a large amount, but hey, that's where we're at! So, today I'll pick up my "free-not-second-hand-awesome-gift" and I feel it came directly from heaven. Lesson #8? God is in the miracle business and He hears our prayers.
At least humour hasn't left our home. The funny things keep happening in our life and I can literally say it is 24/7. The other night, my older son woke up, sat up in bed, started playing cards with his imaginary sister, dealt out cards, asked her to play and then just sat there waiting for her to join in. Of course she didn't, she was in her bed! He kept waiting, calling her name, and then finally he realized, "I'm 'sleep playing'". So funny. The same night, my other son, the 4 year old, got up, took some steps and then just stopped. I heard this and should have jumped out of bed, but thought, "No, he'll get up and go all the way to the bathroom." Then, I heard him go downstairs. It was only 10 pm, so he was clearly sleep walking, too. What is it with my kids?! So I jumped out at this point and told him to go back to bed. As I put him in his bed, I stepped in a giant puddle.....of pee. He had gotten out of bed and had literally stood in the same spot and just let it go right then and there. Yuck. I made sure he went pee last night before tucking him in.
So, that's been our week - what an up and down series of days! I'm grateful to be at the end of it all, but I know there's got to be more around the corner.....I need to be committed to standing on guard against the enemy first and foremost as he won't be content to leave me alone so easily. I need to make sure I continue to believe God is sovereign despite all appearances. I need to look for His miracles even when things aren't looking so good. I need to spend time with people who are an encouragement to me, which is pretty much everyone in my life. Watch out for toxicity! And may the humour never leave!
Friday 27 February 2015
Wednesday 25 February 2015
Give Me This Day, My Daily Bread
Manna for today. That is all He has promised us. Our daily bread. I know this, but I guess yesterday I was a little like the Israelites that wanted the manna for that day and a little extra in store for the days coming up where I didn't think manna would be coming. It must have been a faith walk for them, in a way, too, as yes, the manna would fall each day, but what if it didn't one day? It wouldn't hurt to have a little in storage, would it? But then that manna would go mouldy. They weren't trusting God for the next day.
Yesterday we had enough "manna" to pay for some books we had ordered for the seminar I was giving this weekend. We had not taken into account the massive difference in the American dollar and the exchange rate made it one whopping bill. We had to pay, the books had been shipped! But RM knew, that is definitely going to leave us short for the end of the month. He said, "I'm paying this by faith." I was good with that as I didn't want to have a bad account with a Christian company! I was actually happier to not know how we would pay something else than have a bad account with a brother.
Nevertheless, not knowing what we'll do for the rest of the month which just happens to be over in a matter of days, didn't leave me feeling very good. The hay is almost all gone, so that source of income is disappearing fast, if not gone. The other work my husband has won't pay for months. The money we are due came, but was spoken for immediately. The other money due is not coming for who knows what reason. I tried the "fake it till you make it" type faith where you just tell yourself, "All will work out", but I still felt I needed an extra prayer warrior. My parents are our greatest support and I knew they were already praying knowing the cheque we are waiting on hadn't come in from a major contract so I sent an extra email to my friend who is on the Lent journey with me as well as Stephanie, my bffc.
Both friends emailed immediately sharing great encouragement with me (why do we do things alone when we have the body of Christ?) as well as great answers to prayer in my friend's life who is committed to making things work in her marriage. Stephanie included a wonderful verse that I thought about the rest of the day,
Yesterday we had enough "manna" to pay for some books we had ordered for the seminar I was giving this weekend. We had not taken into account the massive difference in the American dollar and the exchange rate made it one whopping bill. We had to pay, the books had been shipped! But RM knew, that is definitely going to leave us short for the end of the month. He said, "I'm paying this by faith." I was good with that as I didn't want to have a bad account with a Christian company! I was actually happier to not know how we would pay something else than have a bad account with a brother.
Nevertheless, not knowing what we'll do for the rest of the month which just happens to be over in a matter of days, didn't leave me feeling very good. The hay is almost all gone, so that source of income is disappearing fast, if not gone. The other work my husband has won't pay for months. The money we are due came, but was spoken for immediately. The other money due is not coming for who knows what reason. I tried the "fake it till you make it" type faith where you just tell yourself, "All will work out", but I still felt I needed an extra prayer warrior. My parents are our greatest support and I knew they were already praying knowing the cheque we are waiting on hadn't come in from a major contract so I sent an extra email to my friend who is on the Lent journey with me as well as Stephanie, my bffc.
Both friends emailed immediately sharing great encouragement with me (why do we do things alone when we have the body of Christ?) as well as great answers to prayer in my friend's life who is committed to making things work in her marriage. Stephanie included a wonderful verse that I thought about the rest of the day,
2 Kings 25:30
And his allowance was a continual allowance given him of the king, a daily rate for every day, all the days of his life.
Do you see those phrases that talk about God's provision? "A continual allowance" (manna, provision, daily bread?), "given him by the king (could that be God in my situation?), "a daily rate" (just enough), "for every day" (not missing a day), "all the days of his life" (God knows our needs every single day of my life). That is what is happening over here. We are getting what we need for every day, no more. What would a life of faith be without needing to exercise that faith? If I knew for sure when we would get that cheque, I never would have sent out an email asking for prayer. I never would have prayed the way I've been praying. It keeps me on my knees for sure, this day to day existence! Thank you, Stephanie, for the great reminder! He's given me what I need for today. I can't help but remember the rest of the verse in Matthew that says, "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself." Well, tomorrow is now today, but I'm still not allowed to worry about today. Lesson #5? He gives us our daily bread.
So this Friday my husband is planning on heading up to pick up the cheque, as he has planned to do many times which coincidentally is the 2nd last day of the month, talking about going right down to the wire! He's also heading up there to fix a quick problem with the system they've installed. This should work in his favour as he's told the people there, "No cheque, no fix." Ok, perhaps not quite in those words, but that's what he's tried to communicate and I think they understand the cheque better be ready.
I thought about not writing any of this down as it reveals our financial situation to some degree. Pride keeps me from sharing sometimes what is truly going on over here, but then I thought, no, the whole reason I started this blog in the first place is to keep a written record of how God works in our life, how He provides. May He get all the glory as my story gets unfolded before my very eyes....on a daily basis.
Monday 23 February 2015
The Grocery Test, Truck Angels, New Creations
The weekend is over and brought many fun opportunities for food, fellowship and fun with church and other friends we know. It brought unique answers to prayer, too.
All last week I really needed to go grocery shopping. I kept being told to put it off if I could as we were still waiting for moenty to show up, but inevitably the kids would open the fridge and say, "Uh, Mooooom....there's NOTHING to eat! When are you going to go grocery shopping???" "Soon!" I would shout back. But then I had to come up with something for them to eat! The creative juices seemed to flow last week and meal after meal, snack after snack, I came up with something and we got through the whole week without shopping. By Friday, though, I knew I really needed to go shopping. Thankfully, on the last day of the week, one of the cheques we were owed came in - the insurance cheque from the accident! Great timing! Then, more hay money! Off we went to the grocery store to celebrate!
What is the lesson learned there? Lesson #3? He is Jehovah-Jireh, God who provides. Just like the story in my little daughter's reader that I had just read with her last week, God provided the ram for Abraham, stuck in the bushes, just at the last moment before he was about to kill his son Isaac. The grade one reader worded it like this, "God wanted to know if Abraham loved God more or his son more." That was why he was given the test. Abraham passed the test with flying colours, though it was no easy test. And then God provided. I kind of feel like God was giving me a test last week, too - the "No Grocery Test". How would I respond? Right now we are dealing with two of our children in this exact area. We are watching their responses to almost everything we say and almost inevitably they respond negatively or argumentatively. It seems to be their pattern and now it is our job to break it. I suppose I could have pouted with God or towards my husband. I found it to be a great way to use up stuff in my cupboard that I needed to go through and finally clear out. I lean towards being a positive person anyway, but that doesn't mean it was easy. I still get those anxious thoughts if I let them enter in. I knew hay money was coming, but it was mostly spoken for. I didn't know the insurance money was coming. God provided "ram" after "ram" all week. I was able to make healthy, tasty meals and no one starved. Thank you Lord!
Saturday was a very snowy day - not a good day to be out driving and delivery hay. I hoped RM and the boys would be ok. During this time of prayer and fasting, I've been taking every moment I get on my own where there is just myself in a room doing whatever task to just pray. I go through a list in my mind of what I'm praying for and just lift each concern up to the Lord. I was at the sink cleaning, and praying, when I looked outside and saw what looked like my husband and the boys walking down the street towards the house - no truck, no hay trailer to be seen. I knew immediately what had happened. They were stuck in a snowbank at the end of the road. It had already happened to my daughter this winter. It's a tight, slippery corner and with the weather and the weight of the trailer, he probably couldn't make the turn. I knew there was nothing I could do, so I just started to pray. Within seconds of me praying, I saw another truck drive up and stop to talk to my husband. He rolled down the window I found out later, and asked if he could help pull them out, "I have a chain," he said. No one else was out on the roads that day, it was so bad. I hadn't seen any other traffic the whole time I was at the window. Within minutes, he had pulled my family out of the snowbank and off they went for load #2 of hay. I couldn't believe it. I don't carry a chain in my van, do you? God's amazing provision once again, but this time with a truck angel. I guess I needed to see that He cares about all our needs. What was really neat was that it happened right before my very eyes! He could have gotten stuck out of my sight, but it was right where I could see him. I actually watched the miracle unfold before me. He must have known I needed to see Him answer my prayers "live"! Very cool!
Meanwhile, this whole time, I've been in communication with my friend who is also fasting for herself and her family. She's experiencing God in little and big ways already. Hearing from her as each day goes by has been another tangible way to hear from God as I get to experience how He can simultaneously care for me and my family as well as her family. Sometimes I think I am the only one who exists on this planet, that is how well God takes care of me, but He is running the whole earth!
Sunday was the first time our whole family had been able to be at church together as a family for a long time it seemed. We've had viruses or bad weather that have allowed only some of us to be at church this winter. It was good to hear the Word of God, to sing, to pray, to hear other's requests. We heard testimonies of good friends, as they were becoming members, so they shared what God had done in their lives to bring them to himself. I have known these people for 15 years and saw the struggles they went through before becoming true disciples of Christ. It was such an encouragement to hear their story and to have them share it in front of all of us. It was a great reminder of how God is in the business of transforming lives. They are not the same couple I knew 15 years ago. God took this family through a journey that has had lots of ups and downs. But He grabbed hold of them, pruned them and then said, "You are a new creation." Now, the fruit in their lives, their marriage, their children, is amazing! They are now expecting their 8th (though they had previously decided to stop at 3, then the husband had a "reversal" and it worked, really well!) My husband is now in business with this other husband and we are expecting great things to come out of this partnership/friendship. We're both committed to praying together during this period of Lent, for much of the same things. We plan on trying to meet, if not weekly as couples, then at least in our own homes as husband and wife, on our knees before the Lord. This has to be Lesson #4 - God is in the business of transformation. I'm looking to see how He will fulfill this in all the areas we are specifically praying.
So there you have it! Lots of lessons being learned, many blessings in the process. One of my favourite moments this weekend had to be when Jen and Roger made their first "public appearance" at our church potluck. "The Big Reveal", people were calling it! It was sooooooo adorable. I saw Roger and said in the sweetest voice I could, "Hiiii Roooger!" I was teasing him as he was clearly dopey, in love, with Jen on the other side of the room, just as loopy! He said to me, "I'm SOOO happy to be here! As a couple!!!!!" It was so sweet. I just loved it. They make such a great couple, everyone can see it and have never seen Roger like this in his life. Jen, people don't know as well, but I'm guessing it's the same with her. God is so good! Bringing together unlikely people, blessing them beyond measure. It was the icing on the cake for me this weekend. We are anxiously waiting for more news from this sweet couple.......
All last week I really needed to go grocery shopping. I kept being told to put it off if I could as we were still waiting for moenty to show up, but inevitably the kids would open the fridge and say, "Uh, Mooooom....there's NOTHING to eat! When are you going to go grocery shopping???" "Soon!" I would shout back. But then I had to come up with something for them to eat! The creative juices seemed to flow last week and meal after meal, snack after snack, I came up with something and we got through the whole week without shopping. By Friday, though, I knew I really needed to go shopping. Thankfully, on the last day of the week, one of the cheques we were owed came in - the insurance cheque from the accident! Great timing! Then, more hay money! Off we went to the grocery store to celebrate!
What is the lesson learned there? Lesson #3? He is Jehovah-Jireh, God who provides. Just like the story in my little daughter's reader that I had just read with her last week, God provided the ram for Abraham, stuck in the bushes, just at the last moment before he was about to kill his son Isaac. The grade one reader worded it like this, "God wanted to know if Abraham loved God more or his son more." That was why he was given the test. Abraham passed the test with flying colours, though it was no easy test. And then God provided. I kind of feel like God was giving me a test last week, too - the "No Grocery Test". How would I respond? Right now we are dealing with two of our children in this exact area. We are watching their responses to almost everything we say and almost inevitably they respond negatively or argumentatively. It seems to be their pattern and now it is our job to break it. I suppose I could have pouted with God or towards my husband. I found it to be a great way to use up stuff in my cupboard that I needed to go through and finally clear out. I lean towards being a positive person anyway, but that doesn't mean it was easy. I still get those anxious thoughts if I let them enter in. I knew hay money was coming, but it was mostly spoken for. I didn't know the insurance money was coming. God provided "ram" after "ram" all week. I was able to make healthy, tasty meals and no one starved. Thank you Lord!
Saturday was a very snowy day - not a good day to be out driving and delivery hay. I hoped RM and the boys would be ok. During this time of prayer and fasting, I've been taking every moment I get on my own where there is just myself in a room doing whatever task to just pray. I go through a list in my mind of what I'm praying for and just lift each concern up to the Lord. I was at the sink cleaning, and praying, when I looked outside and saw what looked like my husband and the boys walking down the street towards the house - no truck, no hay trailer to be seen. I knew immediately what had happened. They were stuck in a snowbank at the end of the road. It had already happened to my daughter this winter. It's a tight, slippery corner and with the weather and the weight of the trailer, he probably couldn't make the turn. I knew there was nothing I could do, so I just started to pray. Within seconds of me praying, I saw another truck drive up and stop to talk to my husband. He rolled down the window I found out later, and asked if he could help pull them out, "I have a chain," he said. No one else was out on the roads that day, it was so bad. I hadn't seen any other traffic the whole time I was at the window. Within minutes, he had pulled my family out of the snowbank and off they went for load #2 of hay. I couldn't believe it. I don't carry a chain in my van, do you? God's amazing provision once again, but this time with a truck angel. I guess I needed to see that He cares about all our needs. What was really neat was that it happened right before my very eyes! He could have gotten stuck out of my sight, but it was right where I could see him. I actually watched the miracle unfold before me. He must have known I needed to see Him answer my prayers "live"! Very cool!
Meanwhile, this whole time, I've been in communication with my friend who is also fasting for herself and her family. She's experiencing God in little and big ways already. Hearing from her as each day goes by has been another tangible way to hear from God as I get to experience how He can simultaneously care for me and my family as well as her family. Sometimes I think I am the only one who exists on this planet, that is how well God takes care of me, but He is running the whole earth!
Sunday was the first time our whole family had been able to be at church together as a family for a long time it seemed. We've had viruses or bad weather that have allowed only some of us to be at church this winter. It was good to hear the Word of God, to sing, to pray, to hear other's requests. We heard testimonies of good friends, as they were becoming members, so they shared what God had done in their lives to bring them to himself. I have known these people for 15 years and saw the struggles they went through before becoming true disciples of Christ. It was such an encouragement to hear their story and to have them share it in front of all of us. It was a great reminder of how God is in the business of transforming lives. They are not the same couple I knew 15 years ago. God took this family through a journey that has had lots of ups and downs. But He grabbed hold of them, pruned them and then said, "You are a new creation." Now, the fruit in their lives, their marriage, their children, is amazing! They are now expecting their 8th (though they had previously decided to stop at 3, then the husband had a "reversal" and it worked, really well!) My husband is now in business with this other husband and we are expecting great things to come out of this partnership/friendship. We're both committed to praying together during this period of Lent, for much of the same things. We plan on trying to meet, if not weekly as couples, then at least in our own homes as husband and wife, on our knees before the Lord. This has to be Lesson #4 - God is in the business of transformation. I'm looking to see how He will fulfill this in all the areas we are specifically praying.
So there you have it! Lots of lessons being learned, many blessings in the process. One of my favourite moments this weekend had to be when Jen and Roger made their first "public appearance" at our church potluck. "The Big Reveal", people were calling it! It was sooooooo adorable. I saw Roger and said in the sweetest voice I could, "Hiiii Roooger!" I was teasing him as he was clearly dopey, in love, with Jen on the other side of the room, just as loopy! He said to me, "I'm SOOO happy to be here! As a couple!!!!!" It was so sweet. I just loved it. They make such a great couple, everyone can see it and have never seen Roger like this in his life. Jen, people don't know as well, but I'm guessing it's the same with her. God is so good! Bringing together unlikely people, blessing them beyond measure. It was the icing on the cake for me this weekend. We are anxiously waiting for more news from this sweet couple.......
Friday 20 February 2015
Give Me Hopeless - Lessons from Lent
We thought last year was cold. I cannot believe how cold it is this year and how many days in a row it's been ridiculously cold. Lost a cow to it already...hopefully no more!
Three days into Lent - I've been encouraged by a renewed sense of urgency to pray for so many things again. I half-wish that I could sit and write out all my prayers as I am praying while running around the house or folding laundry or doing dishes, as that is when I pray the most, but it is hard to write and fold or wash at the same time.
I have spoken with so many who are taking this challenge on as well. I'm encouraged even by my children as a few took it on without my even suggesting it. I wanted to make sure that they weren't doing it just to be different or as merely a challenge, but that there would be some spiritual goal as well and I was happy to hear they all had spiritual reasons behind the type of fast they had chosen.
No cheques came though leaving it tight once again. I actually find that not stressful yet more of a challenge to my faith, wondering what God will do. Last night we got a call that confirmed all our hay would be taken which is great. At one point my husband thought we might get stuck with it, so money will come today that way.
I'm running potentially two more seminars on "Chores". It's been a challenge to know when and how to order books for it though. When it starts to impact other people, I have to admit, the anxious thoughts do try to creep in.
Our house is shrinking, I think. We are running out of space for children to sleep! Technically there is definitely enough space mattress-wise, but not an actual bed per kid. As each child grows bigger, the ones who actually share a bed are starting to elbow the other one in the middle of the night! They claim they aren't getting good sleeps, etc. I try to make them remember the pioneers or even the children who sleep on mats in Africa, and they know they have nothing to complain about, yet if they could choose, they would like their own beds. So I said to them last night, "It is another thing to pray about." So we prayed, "Lord, you know we need more space for sleeping children. Could you do something so they don't have to squish each other at night?"
Once my oldest daughter moves into the loft room above the piano, then we'll be good, but that requires some money to renovate to make it safe (a rail and a set of stairs). That'll free up a bed for one of my daughters. Then we'll probably need to buy bunkbeds for the little boys as they are still in either a crib or a toddler bed which won't last for much longer! The joys of growing up.
As a way of a recall, on day 1 of the fast, I was half-expecting God to reach down and speak to me in a real voice to encourage me or do a major miracle to kick it off, but it was kind of just a regular day. What made it fun was that we were at a friend's house who lives nearby on one of the most beautiful properties I've ever seen. They have just over 2 acres surrounded by forest - it is stunning. Her husband built the coolest sledding hill for the younger kids going down this hill where he cut a path in the forest, so it is safe - no way to hit a tree yet still enjoy the beauty. I was standing at the top of the hill where there was snow everywhere, gorgeous scenery, laughing children and all I could say was, "You need to charge people to come here! This is amazing!" I was just taking in the incredible vistas, the sounds, the beauty of it all and I couldn't believe what came out of her mouth, "I'm so glad to hear you say that. I forget. My children forget. I've suffered from discontentment all week." WHAT????!!!! I couldn't believe it. It's been upon reflecting that I realize God was speaking to me the first lesson of Lent - the dangers of discontentment.
This friend of mine lives near another family who is extremely well-off and has all they have 4x over. Bigger house, bigger property, better sledding hill, better behaved kids (in her mind!), relatives nearby to help out whenever she needs them (my friend has no one nearby)....she said when her kids come back from their house they'll say things like, "Must be nice to be so rich or live in a mansion like that...." She wants to yell out at them, "YOU ARE RICH!!!! LOOK AROUND YOU!!!! DON'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU HAVE????" She felt her kids had forgotten how good they have it, but then their comments started to make her feel discontent! She started to see all this other mom had and it started to really irk her, too! We're all so weak in this area, aren't we?
We talked for a long time about it. I will keep praying for freedom in my life, specifically financial freedom, as I really do believe I am praying in God's will for that, but I must keep myself in check that I don't start to make that an idol. I must be very aware of discontment in my own life. God must stay as my number one priority. I must stay content in my situation especially if it never changes which it doesn't appear to be! I am being shown favour everyday by the very fact I am alive! The debt must not make me forget that I am still being shown favour despite the fact there are still rocks in my path. The rocks are part of the favour, as I'm learning.
The next day, again, no lightning bolts from heaven, just a regular day. But then I got a phone call from a different friend who is taking Lent on for the first time in the name of her marriage and her finances. She has never done anything like this in her life and she called me to tell me two great things that had happened to her on day 1. I was so grateful that she had received encouragement as she needed it more than I did. God had spoken to her through her daughter. This daughter at one point had basically encouraged her to leave her husband, stop the pain, and get on with her life. But yesterday, she did an about-face. She told her mom, "Don't give up. Don't leave him. You'll regret it. Give him another chance." I'm sure those weren't her exact words, but that was the idea. This blew my friend out of the water and she was so happy to hear it that she called me to tell me. I told her that encouragement came directly from God. She also received an encouragement financially which made her feel that God was already listening to her cries for change in her financial situation.
She encouraged me by her phone call. I hadn't gotten a "sign from God" the way I hoped, but then I realized I did! God uses people to encourage us to stay on His path. He actually had spoken to me through her. By seeing her answers to prayer I was encouraged to keep praying both for her needs and mine. I was so glad she had taken the time to call me and let me know otherwise I wouldn't have been aware of how God was already working. I've, too, have been an encouragement to her, at least that's what she told me. Most of the people in her life would have told her to give up. She hadn't heard the message of hope for a long time. So lesson #2? The body of Christ is critical, It is the hands and feet of Christ himself, coming down with flesh on to encourage us in our walk with Him. We're looking for the lightning bolts or the wild miracles that can only be explained supernaturally when the whole time He is using just regular Spirit-filled people....IF....we open our eyes to this. We can miss it if we aren't careful and then think to ourselves, "Where is God? Why isn't He answering my prayers?" But He is.
So, I am encouraged even though I've had two "regular" days, they have been full of answered prayers already.
I will keep praying. I will keep looking with my eyes wide open for God in everything I do just because of these last two days of "regular". My friend asked me what I was fasting and I told her the things I was giving up. She said, "Wow, you are so disciplined!" I quickly told her, "No, I'm not disciplined at all. I'm just that desperate for change." That struck her later, she told me in the phone call. She had heard all the things I've said to her before, but she was never motivated to do anything about her situation, her marriage, etc. When she thought about it, she realized perhaps it was because she wasn't desperate enough. Then I came along and gave her the challenges that I did. This time, it stuck. Why? Because now she is desperate! I actually love that. I love hopelessness! That is the material that God works with best! If we aren't hopeless enough, than we rely on our own strength, not God. Give me hopeless. Give me desperation. Being in that situation is sadly sometimes what it takes.
Day 3 might just be a regular day, too, but is it really ever "regular" when God is involved? Can't I find something supernatural now that I have the eyes for it? I bet I will.
Three days into Lent - I've been encouraged by a renewed sense of urgency to pray for so many things again. I half-wish that I could sit and write out all my prayers as I am praying while running around the house or folding laundry or doing dishes, as that is when I pray the most, but it is hard to write and fold or wash at the same time.
I have spoken with so many who are taking this challenge on as well. I'm encouraged even by my children as a few took it on without my even suggesting it. I wanted to make sure that they weren't doing it just to be different or as merely a challenge, but that there would be some spiritual goal as well and I was happy to hear they all had spiritual reasons behind the type of fast they had chosen.
No cheques came though leaving it tight once again. I actually find that not stressful yet more of a challenge to my faith, wondering what God will do. Last night we got a call that confirmed all our hay would be taken which is great. At one point my husband thought we might get stuck with it, so money will come today that way.
I'm running potentially two more seminars on "Chores". It's been a challenge to know when and how to order books for it though. When it starts to impact other people, I have to admit, the anxious thoughts do try to creep in.
Our house is shrinking, I think. We are running out of space for children to sleep! Technically there is definitely enough space mattress-wise, but not an actual bed per kid. As each child grows bigger, the ones who actually share a bed are starting to elbow the other one in the middle of the night! They claim they aren't getting good sleeps, etc. I try to make them remember the pioneers or even the children who sleep on mats in Africa, and they know they have nothing to complain about, yet if they could choose, they would like their own beds. So I said to them last night, "It is another thing to pray about." So we prayed, "Lord, you know we need more space for sleeping children. Could you do something so they don't have to squish each other at night?"
Once my oldest daughter moves into the loft room above the piano, then we'll be good, but that requires some money to renovate to make it safe (a rail and a set of stairs). That'll free up a bed for one of my daughters. Then we'll probably need to buy bunkbeds for the little boys as they are still in either a crib or a toddler bed which won't last for much longer! The joys of growing up.
As a way of a recall, on day 1 of the fast, I was half-expecting God to reach down and speak to me in a real voice to encourage me or do a major miracle to kick it off, but it was kind of just a regular day. What made it fun was that we were at a friend's house who lives nearby on one of the most beautiful properties I've ever seen. They have just over 2 acres surrounded by forest - it is stunning. Her husband built the coolest sledding hill for the younger kids going down this hill where he cut a path in the forest, so it is safe - no way to hit a tree yet still enjoy the beauty. I was standing at the top of the hill where there was snow everywhere, gorgeous scenery, laughing children and all I could say was, "You need to charge people to come here! This is amazing!" I was just taking in the incredible vistas, the sounds, the beauty of it all and I couldn't believe what came out of her mouth, "I'm so glad to hear you say that. I forget. My children forget. I've suffered from discontentment all week." WHAT????!!!! I couldn't believe it. It's been upon reflecting that I realize God was speaking to me the first lesson of Lent - the dangers of discontentment.
This friend of mine lives near another family who is extremely well-off and has all they have 4x over. Bigger house, bigger property, better sledding hill, better behaved kids (in her mind!), relatives nearby to help out whenever she needs them (my friend has no one nearby)....she said when her kids come back from their house they'll say things like, "Must be nice to be so rich or live in a mansion like that...." She wants to yell out at them, "YOU ARE RICH!!!! LOOK AROUND YOU!!!! DON'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU HAVE????" She felt her kids had forgotten how good they have it, but then their comments started to make her feel discontent! She started to see all this other mom had and it started to really irk her, too! We're all so weak in this area, aren't we?
We talked for a long time about it. I will keep praying for freedom in my life, specifically financial freedom, as I really do believe I am praying in God's will for that, but I must keep myself in check that I don't start to make that an idol. I must be very aware of discontment in my own life. God must stay as my number one priority. I must stay content in my situation especially if it never changes which it doesn't appear to be! I am being shown favour everyday by the very fact I am alive! The debt must not make me forget that I am still being shown favour despite the fact there are still rocks in my path. The rocks are part of the favour, as I'm learning.
The next day, again, no lightning bolts from heaven, just a regular day. But then I got a phone call from a different friend who is taking Lent on for the first time in the name of her marriage and her finances. She has never done anything like this in her life and she called me to tell me two great things that had happened to her on day 1. I was so grateful that she had received encouragement as she needed it more than I did. God had spoken to her through her daughter. This daughter at one point had basically encouraged her to leave her husband, stop the pain, and get on with her life. But yesterday, she did an about-face. She told her mom, "Don't give up. Don't leave him. You'll regret it. Give him another chance." I'm sure those weren't her exact words, but that was the idea. This blew my friend out of the water and she was so happy to hear it that she called me to tell me. I told her that encouragement came directly from God. She also received an encouragement financially which made her feel that God was already listening to her cries for change in her financial situation.
She encouraged me by her phone call. I hadn't gotten a "sign from God" the way I hoped, but then I realized I did! God uses people to encourage us to stay on His path. He actually had spoken to me through her. By seeing her answers to prayer I was encouraged to keep praying both for her needs and mine. I was so glad she had taken the time to call me and let me know otherwise I wouldn't have been aware of how God was already working. I've, too, have been an encouragement to her, at least that's what she told me. Most of the people in her life would have told her to give up. She hadn't heard the message of hope for a long time. So lesson #2? The body of Christ is critical, It is the hands and feet of Christ himself, coming down with flesh on to encourage us in our walk with Him. We're looking for the lightning bolts or the wild miracles that can only be explained supernaturally when the whole time He is using just regular Spirit-filled people....IF....we open our eyes to this. We can miss it if we aren't careful and then think to ourselves, "Where is God? Why isn't He answering my prayers?" But He is.
So, I am encouraged even though I've had two "regular" days, they have been full of answered prayers already.
I will keep praying. I will keep looking with my eyes wide open for God in everything I do just because of these last two days of "regular". My friend asked me what I was fasting and I told her the things I was giving up. She said, "Wow, you are so disciplined!" I quickly told her, "No, I'm not disciplined at all. I'm just that desperate for change." That struck her later, she told me in the phone call. She had heard all the things I've said to her before, but she was never motivated to do anything about her situation, her marriage, etc. When she thought about it, she realized perhaps it was because she wasn't desperate enough. Then I came along and gave her the challenges that I did. This time, it stuck. Why? Because now she is desperate! I actually love that. I love hopelessness! That is the material that God works with best! If we aren't hopeless enough, than we rely on our own strength, not God. Give me hopeless. Give me desperation. Being in that situation is sadly sometimes what it takes.
Day 3 might just be a regular day, too, but is it really ever "regular" when God is involved? Can't I find something supernatural now that I have the eyes for it? I bet I will.
Wednesday 18 February 2015
Favour Redefined
Well, I said I would chronicle the highs and the lows. We had a bit of an unexpected blow yesterday, quite out of the blue. The contract that we were getting was suddenly just taken away. The quote had been asked for, accepted...we were just awaiting the paperwork. But the boss-guy said no, too expensive, just like that. He basically wanted the work done, for free. My husband said there was just no way he could have done it for less without losing his shirt. He's tired of working for free!
It's interesting when these things happen...it's inevitably when we are about to sit down as a family for our morning prayer/Bible time. RM isn't usually there for that as he's, generally speaking, already "at work" in his office in the shop, so it's usually just the kids and me. This time he was on the road and gave me a call to let me know what had happened.
I always take those calls as calls to prayer. We all sat down and I told the kids what had happened. They knew we were really counting on that contract. It would have bought the garage doors we needed. In our minds it was already spent! But I told them, "What do you think our choices are here? We can either panic and think, 'Oh no! God doesn't know what He's doing!' or we can thank Him, choose faith and wait to see what He's up to, how He'll provide in a different way at a different time." They agreed and the following prayers were amazing as they thanked God for how He was working even though the contract had been taken away.
RM came home and jokingly told me I read the Bible too much, especially the parts about "But if not"! In this case it meant, "We know you will provide what we need, like the garage doors, but if not, we'll trust that you know better and that maybe we don't need them right now!" He had known that yes, the garage doors, were a necessity, but at the same time, the ones that are in there now, as bad as they are at keeping snow, cold, and wind out, still are there at least and that he could get by if necessary. This time the "but if not" part of the verse actually happened! Poor Renaissance Man.
It didn't take long though for him to see the free time that had opened up for him. He still does have work, quite a bit actually. This gives him the ability to focus on what he still has to finish. Plus the farming season is just around the corner, so he'll be able to prep for that as well without getting too side-tracked. I really think losing the contract was a blessing in disguise.
Good things happened, too, though yesterday. We did make a hay delivery that paid really well and covered a whole lot of expenses we had. One of my friends asked me, "So does your husband do more engineering work now or farming?" It was an interesting question as I started to realize it really is about half and half now. His day yesterday was spent doing mostly engineering work in the morning and then he came home, put on his work overalls, grabbed the boys, went out and filled the trailer with hay and then off to make the hay delivery. He loves it though as it is keeping him active, even in the dead of winter with minus minus temperatures!
I had been reading in Genesis yesterday and usually when I read about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, I always think "favour" - they were badly behaved sometimes and yet God showed them favour, but then when I read yesterday about how Jacob was being chased down by his father-in-law, Laban, he basically chewed out Laban and described to him how his past twenty years had gone. It seems he had a slow burn going on as he retells his time with Laban, I started to wonder if I understood what favour really meant.
"These twenty years I have been with you. Your ewes and your females goats have not miscarried, and I have not eaten the rams of your flocks. What was torn by wild beasts I did not bring to you. I bore the loss of it myself. From my hand you required it, whether stolen by day or stolen by night. There I was: by day the heat consumed me, and the cold by night, and my sleep fled from my eyes. These twenty years I have been in your house. I served you fourteen years for your two daughters, and six years for your locks, and you have changed my wages ten times. If the God of my father, the God of Abraham and the Fear of Isaac, had not been on my side, surely now you would have sent me away empty-handed. God saw my affliction and the labour of my hands and rebuked you last night." (Gen. 31:38-42)
But what really struck me was Jacob's twenty years and how he looked back on it - didn't sound like it was a walk in the park after all - he lost animals to wild beasts and had to take the loss himself. He had to work in extreme heat and extreme cold. He was often sleepless. He had to work like a dog just to be married to Laban's daughters. He suffered from inconsistent pay constantly and an inconsistent, unfair boss. Jacob, himself, describes this time as his "affliction" and how it was "labour", i.e., work! Yet, he was favoured? That didn't sound like favour!
Hmmmm....reading that section reminded me a lot like the past twenty years of our life, too! We'll be celebrating our twentieth anniversary, so I read this section with great interest as Jacob recalled his twenty year period with Laban. I've been recalling our past twenty years, too. I could have written a very similar series of verses! We've had losses, worked in difficult situations, extreme heat and cold is actually a normal part of our life and sleepless nights happen around here quite regularly. Inconsistent pay? - for sure. Affliction? Yup. But Jacob saw it as favour. He said God had been on his side!
Perhaps I don't understand what favour really is! Perhaps favour doesn't just mean getting what you want when you want it or having a life of ease with no problems. Favour, in Jacob's case, and even in our case, simply means God was there through everything, even in the trials. He still had to work hard. Yes, God blessed his work, but he still suffered losses. It seems he even "lost contracts", so to speak, or at least he worked for a difficult man in very trying circumstances.
In our twenty years, I remember trials, but I know "If the God of my father...had not been on my side..." we never would have made it. Describing and remembering the trials is actually a recounting of God's favour! Trials=favour! Strange, but true. It's in the looking back, specifically at the trials, that I see Him most in my life. Don't get me wrong, there were many many times where we experienced God in just plain and simple times of blessing - where all went well with the world, too. Those were rich times of God's mercy and I see how He was there in the good times, too, of course.
The bottom line? Jacob was shown favour all during that time of twenty years even though his description of it didn't seem very favoured. I, too, have been shown favour these past twenty years, specifically in the low times. I have a new perspective on what favour looks like! It includes trials and lots of them. Perhaps that is not what the dictionary would say favour is, but I don't live by the dictionary's standard.....
Favour has just been redefined.....
It's interesting when these things happen...it's inevitably when we are about to sit down as a family for our morning prayer/Bible time. RM isn't usually there for that as he's, generally speaking, already "at work" in his office in the shop, so it's usually just the kids and me. This time he was on the road and gave me a call to let me know what had happened.
I always take those calls as calls to prayer. We all sat down and I told the kids what had happened. They knew we were really counting on that contract. It would have bought the garage doors we needed. In our minds it was already spent! But I told them, "What do you think our choices are here? We can either panic and think, 'Oh no! God doesn't know what He's doing!' or we can thank Him, choose faith and wait to see what He's up to, how He'll provide in a different way at a different time." They agreed and the following prayers were amazing as they thanked God for how He was working even though the contract had been taken away.
RM came home and jokingly told me I read the Bible too much, especially the parts about "But if not"! In this case it meant, "We know you will provide what we need, like the garage doors, but if not, we'll trust that you know better and that maybe we don't need them right now!" He had known that yes, the garage doors, were a necessity, but at the same time, the ones that are in there now, as bad as they are at keeping snow, cold, and wind out, still are there at least and that he could get by if necessary. This time the "but if not" part of the verse actually happened! Poor Renaissance Man.
It didn't take long though for him to see the free time that had opened up for him. He still does have work, quite a bit actually. This gives him the ability to focus on what he still has to finish. Plus the farming season is just around the corner, so he'll be able to prep for that as well without getting too side-tracked. I really think losing the contract was a blessing in disguise.
Good things happened, too, though yesterday. We did make a hay delivery that paid really well and covered a whole lot of expenses we had. One of my friends asked me, "So does your husband do more engineering work now or farming?" It was an interesting question as I started to realize it really is about half and half now. His day yesterday was spent doing mostly engineering work in the morning and then he came home, put on his work overalls, grabbed the boys, went out and filled the trailer with hay and then off to make the hay delivery. He loves it though as it is keeping him active, even in the dead of winter with minus minus temperatures!
I had been reading in Genesis yesterday and usually when I read about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, I always think "favour" - they were badly behaved sometimes and yet God showed them favour, but then when I read yesterday about how Jacob was being chased down by his father-in-law, Laban, he basically chewed out Laban and described to him how his past twenty years had gone. It seems he had a slow burn going on as he retells his time with Laban, I started to wonder if I understood what favour really meant.
"These twenty years I have been with you. Your ewes and your females goats have not miscarried, and I have not eaten the rams of your flocks. What was torn by wild beasts I did not bring to you. I bore the loss of it myself. From my hand you required it, whether stolen by day or stolen by night. There I was: by day the heat consumed me, and the cold by night, and my sleep fled from my eyes. These twenty years I have been in your house. I served you fourteen years for your two daughters, and six years for your locks, and you have changed my wages ten times. If the God of my father, the God of Abraham and the Fear of Isaac, had not been on my side, surely now you would have sent me away empty-handed. God saw my affliction and the labour of my hands and rebuked you last night." (Gen. 31:38-42)
But what really struck me was Jacob's twenty years and how he looked back on it - didn't sound like it was a walk in the park after all - he lost animals to wild beasts and had to take the loss himself. He had to work in extreme heat and extreme cold. He was often sleepless. He had to work like a dog just to be married to Laban's daughters. He suffered from inconsistent pay constantly and an inconsistent, unfair boss. Jacob, himself, describes this time as his "affliction" and how it was "labour", i.e., work! Yet, he was favoured? That didn't sound like favour!
Hmmmm....reading that section reminded me a lot like the past twenty years of our life, too! We'll be celebrating our twentieth anniversary, so I read this section with great interest as Jacob recalled his twenty year period with Laban. I've been recalling our past twenty years, too. I could have written a very similar series of verses! We've had losses, worked in difficult situations, extreme heat and cold is actually a normal part of our life and sleepless nights happen around here quite regularly. Inconsistent pay? - for sure. Affliction? Yup. But Jacob saw it as favour. He said God had been on his side!
Perhaps I don't understand what favour really is! Perhaps favour doesn't just mean getting what you want when you want it or having a life of ease with no problems. Favour, in Jacob's case, and even in our case, simply means God was there through everything, even in the trials. He still had to work hard. Yes, God blessed his work, but he still suffered losses. It seems he even "lost contracts", so to speak, or at least he worked for a difficult man in very trying circumstances.
In our twenty years, I remember trials, but I know "If the God of my father...had not been on my side..." we never would have made it. Describing and remembering the trials is actually a recounting of God's favour! Trials=favour! Strange, but true. It's in the looking back, specifically at the trials, that I see Him most in my life. Don't get me wrong, there were many many times where we experienced God in just plain and simple times of blessing - where all went well with the world, too. Those were rich times of God's mercy and I see how He was there in the good times, too, of course.
The bottom line? Jacob was shown favour all during that time of twenty years even though his description of it didn't seem very favoured. I, too, have been shown favour these past twenty years, specifically in the low times. I have a new perspective on what favour looks like! It includes trials and lots of them. Perhaps that is not what the dictionary would say favour is, but I don't live by the dictionary's standard.....
Favour has just been redefined.....
Tuesday 17 February 2015
The Lent Challenge
Today we will be taken out of hot water once again by a hay delivery! We had had two hay cancellations last week which would have had us "relaxed" over the weekend, i.e., we wouldn't have been as stressed about all the automatic payments that were about to come out....but with those cancellations, we had an option: be stressed over the weekend, or not. We chose to not be. And, sure enough, RM got calls about more hay deliveries which will cover all the automatics. Then, the cheque should arrive and we will be good!
I used to see that as a stressful experience, but now it is just a natural part of our faith walk. Always waiting on the Lord to see how He will come through. We are struck by the phrase I mentioned last week and say it all the time now, "But if not".....God doesn't have to get us out of hot water, but it has been our experience that He is so faithful, so gracious, so merciful and has proved Himself to be all those things all the time, so we do believe He will take care of us, "but if not", we will continue to see even the hot water as a way that God is pruning us.
God knows how quick we are to forget Him, so He keeps giving us gentle ways to remind us, "Hello! I'm the one who is your Provider!"
Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent (if I'm correct!) - the next period of days (I think it adds up to a little more than 40 days because of not including Sundays?) is usually the time of preparation before Easter where typically you can choose to give something up as a way of focusing your thoughts towards Christ and what He has done for us. That's what I think it is anyway! I'm sure there is a more Roman Catholic take on it that is based more on tradition, but if I choose to give something up, then it will be because of a focus on Christ.
This year, I've continued to have many conversations with friends about fasting and the power of prayer. Are you allowed to enjoy fasting? I don't mean enjoy with pleasure, because fasting is not fun, but I love to see God work - in my life, other's lives who have never fasted before, etc. That's what I mean by enjoy.
Recently, I was talking with another friend who did not like the idea of fasting and she admitted it. She wondered, in fact, if she could add something, not necessarily take away (are you reading this, good friend? Here's my plan!) I told her ideally it would be to give something up. I think you could only add something, like eating healthy, if it meant giving up, say, sugar. But, in the name of supporting my friend, who is longing for breakthrough in her life, I told her, "Name the date and I'll do it with you."
Then, I remembered Ash Wednesday - what better day to start, ending Easter Sunday - the symbol of the greatest breakthrough of all time! So that's what I'll be emailing her today. I will start on Ash Wednesday and end at Easter. My husband is game, too. He and I will do this together as we are continuing to pray for direction and leading in many areas of our life not just financial, though, that is a main focus for us. I will be praying for her as well and basically anything else God puts on my heart specifically during that time. I'm excited about it and yet, I know, it will be longer than I think!
I used to see that as a stressful experience, but now it is just a natural part of our faith walk. Always waiting on the Lord to see how He will come through. We are struck by the phrase I mentioned last week and say it all the time now, "But if not".....God doesn't have to get us out of hot water, but it has been our experience that He is so faithful, so gracious, so merciful and has proved Himself to be all those things all the time, so we do believe He will take care of us, "but if not", we will continue to see even the hot water as a way that God is pruning us.
God knows how quick we are to forget Him, so He keeps giving us gentle ways to remind us, "Hello! I'm the one who is your Provider!"
Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent (if I'm correct!) - the next period of days (I think it adds up to a little more than 40 days because of not including Sundays?) is usually the time of preparation before Easter where typically you can choose to give something up as a way of focusing your thoughts towards Christ and what He has done for us. That's what I think it is anyway! I'm sure there is a more Roman Catholic take on it that is based more on tradition, but if I choose to give something up, then it will be because of a focus on Christ.
This year, I've continued to have many conversations with friends about fasting and the power of prayer. Are you allowed to enjoy fasting? I don't mean enjoy with pleasure, because fasting is not fun, but I love to see God work - in my life, other's lives who have never fasted before, etc. That's what I mean by enjoy.
Recently, I was talking with another friend who did not like the idea of fasting and she admitted it. She wondered, in fact, if she could add something, not necessarily take away (are you reading this, good friend? Here's my plan!) I told her ideally it would be to give something up. I think you could only add something, like eating healthy, if it meant giving up, say, sugar. But, in the name of supporting my friend, who is longing for breakthrough in her life, I told her, "Name the date and I'll do it with you."
Then, I remembered Ash Wednesday - what better day to start, ending Easter Sunday - the symbol of the greatest breakthrough of all time! So that's what I'll be emailing her today. I will start on Ash Wednesday and end at Easter. My husband is game, too. He and I will do this together as we are continuing to pray for direction and leading in many areas of our life not just financial, though, that is a main focus for us. I will be praying for her as well and basically anything else God puts on my heart specifically during that time. I'm excited about it and yet, I know, it will be longer than I think!
Friday 13 February 2015
There's a Fourth Guy
It's been another tougher week financially as we wait payment, as usual! The insurance company sent a cheque to the car dealership in town as we are still working out all that from the time my husband got hit on the highway. This car dealership is the most crooked place we've ever dealt with. They tried to take a cut of what was ours for doing absolutely nothing. We picked up the cheque and a significant amount of money was missing, for no reason whatsoever. Everytime my husband deals with this company they find a way to "take a cut" above and beyond what is reasonable. It'll be the last time we deal with them for sure.
We also had a couple hay cancellations which is fine, we know we'll sell it, but we were counting on the money at that time! Always depending, always waiting on the Lord.
As I read in Genesis about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, I see how God favoured these men and I'm always in shock at how and why! All of them lied at some point in their lives. Jacob, in particular, was the master deceiver, cheating his brother out of his birthright and blessing. Loved by his mother more and not standing up to her plan of deception, he had to leave town to avoid being killed. Yet somehow God still chose to bless these men! Crazy! Inexplicable! "They don't deserve it!" I want to cry out. But then, of course, I see myself and I realize I don't deserve God's blessing either and yet He pours out His blessing on me, all the time.
In fact, this is my point - we still look back on our lives and always wish we had made better financial decisions. We wish we'd had a different philosophy on debt right from the get-go. But for whatever reason, we just didn't see it the way we wish we had and here we are, in a position we never want our children to be in, so we beg God to help us....just like those men from the Bible, we know we don't deserve God's favour. Oh boy, do we know it. We are no different from them at all! We simply ask God for His blessing, His favour, that He does not have to give us, yet we know, in His mercy, He can.
Then, I read the stories very differently. I actually cling to the fact that they were so bad! I read their stories with much more hope. I'm so grateful that God allowed their humanity to be left plain and clear in the Bible, even the very words from their lying mouths are recorded. But God still met them, in dreams, in visions, with angelic visitors. He prospered them in all they did. He even prospered the people that lived near them like Laban who also certainly didn't deserve it.
Satan still tries to leave me discouraged though. But I think back to when I first started writing and I remember many more days of discouragement. He kind of left me alone for awhile as he realized I was on to him and there wasn't much point, but then why leave me alone forever, so he tried again this week.
It was classic - I think it was Tuesday morning, first thing. RM went out to his office and there was a payment on the credit card that was from CollegePlus, but instead of giving us a heads up, they made it an "automatic" payment that he hadn't authorized. This was easy to clear up and it eventually was, but not at first. One thing to make my husband upset is to take money automatically without his authorization!
It's easy to see how it is an attack afterwards, but at the time, you are just stuck in the middle of it all and you can't see it right away. I immediately started to feel an awful feeling in my stomach. I started to doubt the college decision as it was costing so much money. I started to feel we'd made the wrong decision, how would we pay, what were we going to do. Then he got a phone bill that showed a charge that was waaaaay over our limit on the cell (meaning the kids were using it when they weren't allowed!), He wasn't too happy about that either! Then I started feeling awful about that! I felt like things like this shouldn't happen when we're trying to be careful with our money - it was the "We're such bad people!" feeling. "We'll never get out of debt if all we have are constant expenses that we shouldn't have in the first place!!!" kind of feeling.
I had made breakfast. I handed my husband his plate and then I just went and sat by myself on the couch. I ate mechanically as I was so sick in my stomach. I could almost feel the knots being made. I just sat there trying so hard to calm myself down as I knew panic wouldn't help me or anyone. Then a thought came into my head and it just wouldn't go away, "Nothing can separate you from the love of God." Over and over I heard the phrase. Then my husband came into the family room and one look at me made him say, "What's wrong?" I guess it was all over my face. I told him how stressed I was feeling and he immediately said, "Don't be. We'll work it out." Then he went outside to sort things out.
I got up and decided I had to keep going on as well as I could. In other times, I've started to get snippy with the kids if I'm stressed and I've taken my stress out on them. This time, I determined not to and we just got on with our day. I didn't want to pass on stress to them that they didn't need to feel. As I walked around, I kept thinking about the phrase, "Nothing can separate you from the love of God." So I just thanked him as I walked around cleaning up, constantly praying, constantly walking around literally by faith. I decided I would just trust despite how things looked.
Moments later, RM turned up. He came right up to me and said, "We got the contract." Just like that. He had only left minutes earlier. He'd gone to his office and the phone had rang. He ended up talking to someone who had asked for a quote weeks earlier, but it hadn't been accepted yet. That morning they'd called to say they wanted to go ahead with it. This is the one that pays first!!! Not 30 days after the work is done!!!!! I literally sighed with relief. Praise God was all I could think of. He had done it again. I just had to exercise my faith in Him, trusting Him despite all appearances, that He truly was in control.
We are now studying Daniel in church. That is the theme of that book. God is in control despite all appearances. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego said it best,
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego answered and said to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If this be so, nour God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king.418 But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.”
My favourite part of that verse is the "But if not" phrase. See, even if God hadn't blessed us that day with the contract I would have been ok. I had decided to not worship Nebuchandnezzar's idol, which in my case had been the idol of fear Satan had set up for me. It wasn't easy at first as I sure wanted to crumble that day and give in to fear, but as I thought about what that looked like, I knew it would have ruined me and my family, so I decided, by faith, that God could save me, "but if not", even if God didn't "save me" from the fiery furnace I was in that day, God was still in control despite all appearances.
Then the miracle happened. King Nebuchadnezzar noticed something funny....
Then King Nebuchadnezzar was tastonished and rose up uin haste. He declared to his vcounselors, “Did we not cast three men wbound into the fire?” They answered and said to the king, “True, O king.” 25 He answered and said, “But I see four men unbound, xwalking in the midst of the fire, and they yare not hurt; and the appearance of the fourth is like za son of the gods.”
God showed up. He was in the furnace with the boys. Isn't that great? God was with me in my little fiery trial, too. He was speaking to me in my mind, "Nothing...nothing...not a bill, not an automatic payment, not an upset husband.....nothing can separate you from the love of God." He showed up! He spoke to me! Then, almost to confirm His love, He gave us the contract minutes later. He could have waited for a different day, or even a different hour that same day, but He was gracious to me and gave me a sign of His love for me right away. I was so grateful. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego must have been so relieved to have the fourth guy show up, too! Nice to have a little support in the furnace!
So, a victory, for God, for me - Satan tried but didn't succeed. The furnace has felt soooo hot this week. I have been certain at moments during this week that we are going to get burnt to a crisp and it has been close, I'm telling you, but there has been a fourth guy walking around with us and for some reason we are still alive. He has been "walking in the midst of the fire" with us and we "are not hurt".
Isaiah 43 confirms it:
But now, this is what the Lord says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
So, even if I'm in deep waters, which I am, or walking through a fire, which I am, I am not going to be swept under or set ablaze. There's a fourth guy.
We also had a couple hay cancellations which is fine, we know we'll sell it, but we were counting on the money at that time! Always depending, always waiting on the Lord.
As I read in Genesis about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, I see how God favoured these men and I'm always in shock at how and why! All of them lied at some point in their lives. Jacob, in particular, was the master deceiver, cheating his brother out of his birthright and blessing. Loved by his mother more and not standing up to her plan of deception, he had to leave town to avoid being killed. Yet somehow God still chose to bless these men! Crazy! Inexplicable! "They don't deserve it!" I want to cry out. But then, of course, I see myself and I realize I don't deserve God's blessing either and yet He pours out His blessing on me, all the time.
In fact, this is my point - we still look back on our lives and always wish we had made better financial decisions. We wish we'd had a different philosophy on debt right from the get-go. But for whatever reason, we just didn't see it the way we wish we had and here we are, in a position we never want our children to be in, so we beg God to help us....just like those men from the Bible, we know we don't deserve God's favour. Oh boy, do we know it. We are no different from them at all! We simply ask God for His blessing, His favour, that He does not have to give us, yet we know, in His mercy, He can.
Then, I read the stories very differently. I actually cling to the fact that they were so bad! I read their stories with much more hope. I'm so grateful that God allowed their humanity to be left plain and clear in the Bible, even the very words from their lying mouths are recorded. But God still met them, in dreams, in visions, with angelic visitors. He prospered them in all they did. He even prospered the people that lived near them like Laban who also certainly didn't deserve it.
Satan still tries to leave me discouraged though. But I think back to when I first started writing and I remember many more days of discouragement. He kind of left me alone for awhile as he realized I was on to him and there wasn't much point, but then why leave me alone forever, so he tried again this week.
It was classic - I think it was Tuesday morning, first thing. RM went out to his office and there was a payment on the credit card that was from CollegePlus, but instead of giving us a heads up, they made it an "automatic" payment that he hadn't authorized. This was easy to clear up and it eventually was, but not at first. One thing to make my husband upset is to take money automatically without his authorization!
It's easy to see how it is an attack afterwards, but at the time, you are just stuck in the middle of it all and you can't see it right away. I immediately started to feel an awful feeling in my stomach. I started to doubt the college decision as it was costing so much money. I started to feel we'd made the wrong decision, how would we pay, what were we going to do. Then he got a phone bill that showed a charge that was waaaaay over our limit on the cell (meaning the kids were using it when they weren't allowed!), He wasn't too happy about that either! Then I started feeling awful about that! I felt like things like this shouldn't happen when we're trying to be careful with our money - it was the "We're such bad people!" feeling. "We'll never get out of debt if all we have are constant expenses that we shouldn't have in the first place!!!" kind of feeling.
I had made breakfast. I handed my husband his plate and then I just went and sat by myself on the couch. I ate mechanically as I was so sick in my stomach. I could almost feel the knots being made. I just sat there trying so hard to calm myself down as I knew panic wouldn't help me or anyone. Then a thought came into my head and it just wouldn't go away, "Nothing can separate you from the love of God." Over and over I heard the phrase. Then my husband came into the family room and one look at me made him say, "What's wrong?" I guess it was all over my face. I told him how stressed I was feeling and he immediately said, "Don't be. We'll work it out." Then he went outside to sort things out.
I got up and decided I had to keep going on as well as I could. In other times, I've started to get snippy with the kids if I'm stressed and I've taken my stress out on them. This time, I determined not to and we just got on with our day. I didn't want to pass on stress to them that they didn't need to feel. As I walked around, I kept thinking about the phrase, "Nothing can separate you from the love of God." So I just thanked him as I walked around cleaning up, constantly praying, constantly walking around literally by faith. I decided I would just trust despite how things looked.
Moments later, RM turned up. He came right up to me and said, "We got the contract." Just like that. He had only left minutes earlier. He'd gone to his office and the phone had rang. He ended up talking to someone who had asked for a quote weeks earlier, but it hadn't been accepted yet. That morning they'd called to say they wanted to go ahead with it. This is the one that pays first!!! Not 30 days after the work is done!!!!! I literally sighed with relief. Praise God was all I could think of. He had done it again. I just had to exercise my faith in Him, trusting Him despite all appearances, that He truly was in control.
We are now studying Daniel in church. That is the theme of that book. God is in control despite all appearances. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego said it best,
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego answered and said to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If this be so, nour God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king.418 But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.”
My favourite part of that verse is the "But if not" phrase. See, even if God hadn't blessed us that day with the contract I would have been ok. I had decided to not worship Nebuchandnezzar's idol, which in my case had been the idol of fear Satan had set up for me. It wasn't easy at first as I sure wanted to crumble that day and give in to fear, but as I thought about what that looked like, I knew it would have ruined me and my family, so I decided, by faith, that God could save me, "but if not", even if God didn't "save me" from the fiery furnace I was in that day, God was still in control despite all appearances.
Then the miracle happened. King Nebuchadnezzar noticed something funny....
Then King Nebuchadnezzar was tastonished and rose up uin haste. He declared to his vcounselors, “Did we not cast three men wbound into the fire?” They answered and said to the king, “True, O king.” 25 He answered and said, “But I see four men unbound, xwalking in the midst of the fire, and they yare not hurt; and the appearance of the fourth is like za son of the gods.”
God showed up. He was in the furnace with the boys. Isn't that great? God was with me in my little fiery trial, too. He was speaking to me in my mind, "Nothing...nothing...not a bill, not an automatic payment, not an upset husband.....nothing can separate you from the love of God." He showed up! He spoke to me! Then, almost to confirm His love, He gave us the contract minutes later. He could have waited for a different day, or even a different hour that same day, but He was gracious to me and gave me a sign of His love for me right away. I was so grateful. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego must have been so relieved to have the fourth guy show up, too! Nice to have a little support in the furnace!
So, a victory, for God, for me - Satan tried but didn't succeed. The furnace has felt soooo hot this week. I have been certain at moments during this week that we are going to get burnt to a crisp and it has been close, I'm telling you, but there has been a fourth guy walking around with us and for some reason we are still alive. He has been "walking in the midst of the fire" with us and we "are not hurt".
Isaiah 43 confirms it:
But now, this is what the Lord says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
So, even if I'm in deep waters, which I am, or walking through a fire, which I am, I am not going to be swept under or set ablaze. There's a fourth guy.
Tuesday 10 February 2015
Day of What???? Passing the Homeschool Teacher Test and Sweet Rest
Already lots of words I haven't heard for a long time are starting to float around the house - big words! Post-modernism, trascendentalism, naturalism, theism....and my daughter who is now studying all this in her worldview course actually understands it all and is loving it. I am quite enjoying it, too, as she is making me read over worksheets or listen to assignments. It's good to refresh my memory, too.
But last week, I nearly fell out of my chair (that seems to happen to me alot). She told me an amazing fact she had learned about Russia and it was just too crazy to believe, I even had to google it to make sure! If you haven't heard about this you wouldn't have believed it either.
Apparently, well, actually, we probably all know this, but apparently Russia is blaming its suffering economy on the fact that it's population is declining, due to lack of children being born. The truth is, many, many children are being conceived, but never born. The abortion rate in Russia, i.e., the number of children being killed is higher than the amount of children born. That is too awful to imagine.
Russia decided to do something about this, so they created a holiday, are you ready for this? The Day of Conception. I'm not joking. They give people the day off work and they are told they must go home and.....conceive! And conceive they do, no doubt their theory worked! But did it? No. Most of the babies conceived that day never see the light of day. Russia doesn't understand they didn't get to the root of the problem. Their worldview tells them children are a burden and must be gotten rid of. They have a statistical number like 1.2 or 1.4 children per family to prove this. It is so sad!
It is great for my daughter to learn this. Around here she is surrounded by homeschoolers who, generally speaking, have large families. This year alone, I had 4 friends either expecting their 8th or their 9th babies - that is quite normal for my daughter to see and she loves it! She certainly knows the world doesn't love children, but to see it so clearly in Russia was really eye-opening to her.
This is the great part of learning alongside my daughter, even in her college courses. We get to talk about everything. I learned many things I would have loved to discuss with others when I was going to school as I was a newly committed Christian at that time. So it's been fun to have her at the kitchen table. You can almost see the wheels turning in her mind as new ideas get exposed to her. It's the ultimate test of a homeschooling mom, "Did I prepare her well enough? Can she communicate well, both written and spoken? Will she now be able to live out her faith in the world?"
I certainly had her (and the other kids, too) do special assignments along the way where she had to do "research" of some kind or I had her write about the history we'd be reading about, but when they were all little, the only thing I had them truly write about was their lives. I have the sweetest little "books" they wrote when they were younger and it was only about their days, the field trips, or the bumped heads. Those were their stories, almost exclusively, not some silly made-up idea that didn't make sense to them. If I had them write about their day the day before, they could go on and on. I would start with them dictating to me until they were 6 or 7, but by 8 they were full on writing and they wanted to! They wanted to record their lives! I love their little perspectives looking back. This is the interesting thing though, it taught them to write, to describe things really well and to be honest, I never ever bought a single writing program and each one of my children is an amazing writer, just because they wrote about their lives.
I read what my daughter had to articulate yesterday about all the worldviews she'd been studying and I have to say, I felt a little proud of myself - she was so clear and worded things so well! Taking these courses has been as much a test of my teaching as well as her learning. It seems we are both passing! Ok, I realize I can't take all the credit, but I was her teacher for most of her life!!!! Maybe she really did learn a few things when she was under my tutelage. It was a great feeling, very satisfying and so fulfilling! I wondered, "When did that happen?" How does it go from being a story about your day to writing about worldview and writing about it well? However it happened, I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful I was there the whole time, alongside her. People always told me (and now I do the same) that it would go so fast. I had no idea how fast it would go.
The funny thing was I had my 11 year old in tears last night as she went to bed. Why? Because I told her that today she had to try to learn about decimals by herself. What???? "No! You have to teach me!" "Yes, of course, I will, but first you must try to learn yourself." She did not like this and was panicking, thus the tears. I told her the whole idea of homeschooling is that you must learn to become self-taught which is why the oldest is doing so well in her courses, she is teaching herself to learn. I am no longer teaching her. I explained that I must be more focused on the younger ones now and that they need me more as they don't even all know how to read. She does and she needs to take up a little less time with me and start teaching herself more and more. This was quite disturbing to her. I reminded her, "I'm not kicking you out of the house! I'm not leaving you! I just want you to try to read the instructions first!" Finally, she understood - whew! There is always so much drama with that one! But it's a fact - I cannot and will not "homeschool" all of them everyday at the same time! I would lose my mind. The idea is to get them started and then push them out of the way into their own rooms to study on their own. The older 3 get that and are doing great. She's next - it's called "learning to fly" by kicking them out of the nest, in the safety of our own kitchen. Now, I just have to pray that decimals won't be what does her in and that somehow she'll see they aren't actually that hard to understand!
Every day holds so much around here! Last Friday, I put the 2 year old down for a nap, then the 2 older boys went skating at a rink for an hour. Then, my 3 girls went to Grandma's for a tea party. Then my husband took the 2 busy boys (4 and 8 years old) on an errand for the morning.....I was left completely alone....just me and the cats. At first, I couldn't believe how quiet it was. I was loving it! Then, I ran around the house getting it clean, to the level I wish it could look all day everyday. Then, I made an amazing soup (broccoli/chicken noodle). Then, after I finished all that, no one was back yet, so unbelievably, I didn't know what to do! So I picked up the computer and read the news! I never have time to do that in the middle of the day! Shortly after, one by one, people started to show up and my "break" was over. I did enjoy the peace and quiet for awhile, I have to admit. I always say to my husband, "If everyone could just be out of the house for a couple hours every week, I could keep this place spotless!" But it's not true. It always gets messed up right away no matter what...Ah well, it was loud again within a few minutes, but it was great. Everyone had so much to tell me from their different little trips. When my four year old came home, he entered in, slammed the door and then announced, "I'M HOME!!!" as if I didn't know! It was great.
More ahead today....decimals, new readers, laundry (loads of it), screaming toddlers (it's his new thing). I'm just like the kids....I write my life down now just like they do. Now I can see why they have learned to write, it's fun and easy! I'm sure I will look back on this one day, too, and laugh at what seemed like such a struggle at the time. Thank goodness for those little breaks once in awhile!
But last week, I nearly fell out of my chair (that seems to happen to me alot). She told me an amazing fact she had learned about Russia and it was just too crazy to believe, I even had to google it to make sure! If you haven't heard about this you wouldn't have believed it either.
Apparently, well, actually, we probably all know this, but apparently Russia is blaming its suffering economy on the fact that it's population is declining, due to lack of children being born. The truth is, many, many children are being conceived, but never born. The abortion rate in Russia, i.e., the number of children being killed is higher than the amount of children born. That is too awful to imagine.
Russia decided to do something about this, so they created a holiday, are you ready for this? The Day of Conception. I'm not joking. They give people the day off work and they are told they must go home and.....conceive! And conceive they do, no doubt their theory worked! But did it? No. Most of the babies conceived that day never see the light of day. Russia doesn't understand they didn't get to the root of the problem. Their worldview tells them children are a burden and must be gotten rid of. They have a statistical number like 1.2 or 1.4 children per family to prove this. It is so sad!
It is great for my daughter to learn this. Around here she is surrounded by homeschoolers who, generally speaking, have large families. This year alone, I had 4 friends either expecting their 8th or their 9th babies - that is quite normal for my daughter to see and she loves it! She certainly knows the world doesn't love children, but to see it so clearly in Russia was really eye-opening to her.
This is the great part of learning alongside my daughter, even in her college courses. We get to talk about everything. I learned many things I would have loved to discuss with others when I was going to school as I was a newly committed Christian at that time. So it's been fun to have her at the kitchen table. You can almost see the wheels turning in her mind as new ideas get exposed to her. It's the ultimate test of a homeschooling mom, "Did I prepare her well enough? Can she communicate well, both written and spoken? Will she now be able to live out her faith in the world?"
I certainly had her (and the other kids, too) do special assignments along the way where she had to do "research" of some kind or I had her write about the history we'd be reading about, but when they were all little, the only thing I had them truly write about was their lives. I have the sweetest little "books" they wrote when they were younger and it was only about their days, the field trips, or the bumped heads. Those were their stories, almost exclusively, not some silly made-up idea that didn't make sense to them. If I had them write about their day the day before, they could go on and on. I would start with them dictating to me until they were 6 or 7, but by 8 they were full on writing and they wanted to! They wanted to record their lives! I love their little perspectives looking back. This is the interesting thing though, it taught them to write, to describe things really well and to be honest, I never ever bought a single writing program and each one of my children is an amazing writer, just because they wrote about their lives.
I read what my daughter had to articulate yesterday about all the worldviews she'd been studying and I have to say, I felt a little proud of myself - she was so clear and worded things so well! Taking these courses has been as much a test of my teaching as well as her learning. It seems we are both passing! Ok, I realize I can't take all the credit, but I was her teacher for most of her life!!!! Maybe she really did learn a few things when she was under my tutelage. It was a great feeling, very satisfying and so fulfilling! I wondered, "When did that happen?" How does it go from being a story about your day to writing about worldview and writing about it well? However it happened, I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful I was there the whole time, alongside her. People always told me (and now I do the same) that it would go so fast. I had no idea how fast it would go.
The funny thing was I had my 11 year old in tears last night as she went to bed. Why? Because I told her that today she had to try to learn about decimals by herself. What???? "No! You have to teach me!" "Yes, of course, I will, but first you must try to learn yourself." She did not like this and was panicking, thus the tears. I told her the whole idea of homeschooling is that you must learn to become self-taught which is why the oldest is doing so well in her courses, she is teaching herself to learn. I am no longer teaching her. I explained that I must be more focused on the younger ones now and that they need me more as they don't even all know how to read. She does and she needs to take up a little less time with me and start teaching herself more and more. This was quite disturbing to her. I reminded her, "I'm not kicking you out of the house! I'm not leaving you! I just want you to try to read the instructions first!" Finally, she understood - whew! There is always so much drama with that one! But it's a fact - I cannot and will not "homeschool" all of them everyday at the same time! I would lose my mind. The idea is to get them started and then push them out of the way into their own rooms to study on their own. The older 3 get that and are doing great. She's next - it's called "learning to fly" by kicking them out of the nest, in the safety of our own kitchen. Now, I just have to pray that decimals won't be what does her in and that somehow she'll see they aren't actually that hard to understand!
Every day holds so much around here! Last Friday, I put the 2 year old down for a nap, then the 2 older boys went skating at a rink for an hour. Then, my 3 girls went to Grandma's for a tea party. Then my husband took the 2 busy boys (4 and 8 years old) on an errand for the morning.....I was left completely alone....just me and the cats. At first, I couldn't believe how quiet it was. I was loving it! Then, I ran around the house getting it clean, to the level I wish it could look all day everyday. Then, I made an amazing soup (broccoli/chicken noodle). Then, after I finished all that, no one was back yet, so unbelievably, I didn't know what to do! So I picked up the computer and read the news! I never have time to do that in the middle of the day! Shortly after, one by one, people started to show up and my "break" was over. I did enjoy the peace and quiet for awhile, I have to admit. I always say to my husband, "If everyone could just be out of the house for a couple hours every week, I could keep this place spotless!" But it's not true. It always gets messed up right away no matter what...Ah well, it was loud again within a few minutes, but it was great. Everyone had so much to tell me from their different little trips. When my four year old came home, he entered in, slammed the door and then announced, "I'M HOME!!!" as if I didn't know! It was great.
More ahead today....decimals, new readers, laundry (loads of it), screaming toddlers (it's his new thing). I'm just like the kids....I write my life down now just like they do. Now I can see why they have learned to write, it's fun and easy! I'm sure I will look back on this one day, too, and laugh at what seemed like such a struggle at the time. Thank goodness for those little breaks once in awhile!
Monday 9 February 2015
He Wants to Bottle His Life!
One of the dangerous things about blogs is that they can potentially show only the highlights of life and perhaps not give a true representation of what it is really like over here. But once in awhile, the side it shows is really how it is! Take Saturday for instance....
My husband sat down when the day was over and said to me, "I wish I could just bottle my life and sell it....." He had had a fantastic day! It sure wasn't a typical Saturday, compared to how we used to spend our Saturdays.
It started with us standing in the kitchen around 8:30 am or so looking outside at the all the snow falling, watching how slow the cars drove by. I noticed one car, driving particularly slowly and even mentioned it, "Look at how slow that car is going. Wow, it's going so slow it looks like it might actually stop and turn around. No wait, it's pulling in our driveway. Someone's here!" It was our neighbour, hadn't recognized the car. I think we get watched waaaay more than we realize. "Did you know your horse was out, the blondie?" "No! Thanks! How did she do that?!" Off she went, leaving us to deal with a loose horse.
Fortunately this horse is very docile, unlike the bad minis we have, and she didn't even run away when RM approached her. We had the fence turned off and she figured that out. In fact, she may have had that figured out for awhile as there had been evidence of her doing this before, but we wrote it off in our minds thinking, "Couldn't be...." Sure enough, later on that day, we actually watched how she did it - caught her red-hoofed! She lifts the top wire with her nose, then she steps carefully out with one hoof after another and ducks under the fence. RM saw her out later on that day and as she caught his eye, she literally looked nervous knowing she was in trouble and that's when he saw how she got back in! Funny horse. Needless to say, the fence is back on. That was just in the first hour of waking up, no coffee even yet!
Shortly after that, I stuffed some breakfast in him and the older boys and off they went to load a trailer full of hay, 50 bales to a customer about 15 minutes away. This is part of the reason he loves living here - it gets him outside and active. He gets to work hard alongside his boys. When he worked in Toronto at a desk, he suffered. I think his health would have seriously deteriorated if he had stayed there. Even though he does have arthritis in a toe joint or two, getting out there, being active has helped him so much.
He left the boys with me thinking he'd be able to handle the actual delivery on his own, but it ended up being quite the experience. After he got back, he walked in and with a loud voice said, "Would anyone like to know how my day has been??!!!! Someone needs to ask me how my day was???!!!" "Uh, yes, Daddy, how was your day?" "Thank you for asking. Let me tell you about it!" He was red and sweaty and clearly things hadn't gone as smoothly as he hoped. Horse people, it turns out, aren't very helpful when it comes to delivery hay. They expect it delivered right into their barn, even if they could help lift it, they don't. And if you get your truck and trailer stuck, they tend to stand around and watch. That's what happened. Finally some grandpa who lived there helped him out with a tractor, but he would have been stuck there all day if he hadn't done most of it himself. It was quite the ordeal. But get this, he loved it. He said he loves going to see other people's farms and how they organize them, the lay out, etc. Even pushing his trailer around surprised himself as his strength has definitely improved since we moved here. I do admire a lot more muscles around here......
The day was only half over. At 2 pm we were expecting a family to come over to train us on how to prune the grapes. We've made the crazy decision to not rent out the grapes to our neighbour this year. He pays us diddly-squat (great word) and it won't hurt us in the slightest even if we do nothing with them. But the grapes need pruning and trust me, we have no idea what we're doing. It just so happens we have a friend who had a grape farm when he was growing up and when we asked his wife if he could train us, she was certain he would love to show us what to do. So his whole family came over and, with all the pruners, off they went - in the snow! All the pruning has to be done in either the fall or the dead of winter before the buds come. We're already getting a little close to March, so snow couldn't deter us. This will be one of the ventures we take on this summer at the farmer's markets, selling grapes, or possibly a u-pick or even selling to a grape buyer. We'll see. It'll take one person a full day to prune one row and we have 23 rows, so we're easily looking at the next month before it's done with all the kids helping. Should be interesting!
The men and older kids were out there for several hours learning how to do this. So many Biblical thoughts ran through my mind all day as they are pruning the plant so that it will produce more fruit. They cut back so far it looks like it couldn't possibly ever come back, but it does. God's pruning, as we all know, is just like that - it hurts so much yet it always produces fruit, doesn't it?
After a long while in the cold, they came back in looking for dinner. We all ate and then visited until late into the night. Our friends didn't know RM and my daughter still had music practice ahead of them! Once they left, he picked up his guitar and "S" went to the piano and they quickly did a short practice (as they were leading worship together the next day) before he flopped back on the couch and that's when he said he wanted to bottle his life! My dad called in the middle of all this and probably thought he'd find us getting ready for bed. I heard my husband say to him, "You have no idea all the balls I've been juggling today."
It was one busy day. But he loved every active minute of it. Of course the challenges of life still exist and I'll still make sure to write about those things, too, but I'm noticing that even the challenges can be positives (like being stuck in the snow - he found out he was no weakling!). It really is up to me to keep my outlook forever turned heavenwards. Then, the challenges we have during the day are immediately seen for what they are meant to develop in us - perseverance, endurance, patience...all that fruit we wish could come without the pruning! Perhaps we won't be able to bottle his life. We don't have to. Each one of us has this same fulfilling life right where we are.
My husband sat down when the day was over and said to me, "I wish I could just bottle my life and sell it....." He had had a fantastic day! It sure wasn't a typical Saturday, compared to how we used to spend our Saturdays.
It started with us standing in the kitchen around 8:30 am or so looking outside at the all the snow falling, watching how slow the cars drove by. I noticed one car, driving particularly slowly and even mentioned it, "Look at how slow that car is going. Wow, it's going so slow it looks like it might actually stop and turn around. No wait, it's pulling in our driveway. Someone's here!" It was our neighbour, hadn't recognized the car. I think we get watched waaaay more than we realize. "Did you know your horse was out, the blondie?" "No! Thanks! How did she do that?!" Off she went, leaving us to deal with a loose horse.
Fortunately this horse is very docile, unlike the bad minis we have, and she didn't even run away when RM approached her. We had the fence turned off and she figured that out. In fact, she may have had that figured out for awhile as there had been evidence of her doing this before, but we wrote it off in our minds thinking, "Couldn't be...." Sure enough, later on that day, we actually watched how she did it - caught her red-hoofed! She lifts the top wire with her nose, then she steps carefully out with one hoof after another and ducks under the fence. RM saw her out later on that day and as she caught his eye, she literally looked nervous knowing she was in trouble and that's when he saw how she got back in! Funny horse. Needless to say, the fence is back on. That was just in the first hour of waking up, no coffee even yet!
Shortly after that, I stuffed some breakfast in him and the older boys and off they went to load a trailer full of hay, 50 bales to a customer about 15 minutes away. This is part of the reason he loves living here - it gets him outside and active. He gets to work hard alongside his boys. When he worked in Toronto at a desk, he suffered. I think his health would have seriously deteriorated if he had stayed there. Even though he does have arthritis in a toe joint or two, getting out there, being active has helped him so much.
He left the boys with me thinking he'd be able to handle the actual delivery on his own, but it ended up being quite the experience. After he got back, he walked in and with a loud voice said, "Would anyone like to know how my day has been??!!!! Someone needs to ask me how my day was???!!!" "Uh, yes, Daddy, how was your day?" "Thank you for asking. Let me tell you about it!" He was red and sweaty and clearly things hadn't gone as smoothly as he hoped. Horse people, it turns out, aren't very helpful when it comes to delivery hay. They expect it delivered right into their barn, even if they could help lift it, they don't. And if you get your truck and trailer stuck, they tend to stand around and watch. That's what happened. Finally some grandpa who lived there helped him out with a tractor, but he would have been stuck there all day if he hadn't done most of it himself. It was quite the ordeal. But get this, he loved it. He said he loves going to see other people's farms and how they organize them, the lay out, etc. Even pushing his trailer around surprised himself as his strength has definitely improved since we moved here. I do admire a lot more muscles around here......
The day was only half over. At 2 pm we were expecting a family to come over to train us on how to prune the grapes. We've made the crazy decision to not rent out the grapes to our neighbour this year. He pays us diddly-squat (great word) and it won't hurt us in the slightest even if we do nothing with them. But the grapes need pruning and trust me, we have no idea what we're doing. It just so happens we have a friend who had a grape farm when he was growing up and when we asked his wife if he could train us, she was certain he would love to show us what to do. So his whole family came over and, with all the pruners, off they went - in the snow! All the pruning has to be done in either the fall or the dead of winter before the buds come. We're already getting a little close to March, so snow couldn't deter us. This will be one of the ventures we take on this summer at the farmer's markets, selling grapes, or possibly a u-pick or even selling to a grape buyer. We'll see. It'll take one person a full day to prune one row and we have 23 rows, so we're easily looking at the next month before it's done with all the kids helping. Should be interesting!
The men and older kids were out there for several hours learning how to do this. So many Biblical thoughts ran through my mind all day as they are pruning the plant so that it will produce more fruit. They cut back so far it looks like it couldn't possibly ever come back, but it does. God's pruning, as we all know, is just like that - it hurts so much yet it always produces fruit, doesn't it?
After a long while in the cold, they came back in looking for dinner. We all ate and then visited until late into the night. Our friends didn't know RM and my daughter still had music practice ahead of them! Once they left, he picked up his guitar and "S" went to the piano and they quickly did a short practice (as they were leading worship together the next day) before he flopped back on the couch and that's when he said he wanted to bottle his life! My dad called in the middle of all this and probably thought he'd find us getting ready for bed. I heard my husband say to him, "You have no idea all the balls I've been juggling today."
It was one busy day. But he loved every active minute of it. Of course the challenges of life still exist and I'll still make sure to write about those things, too, but I'm noticing that even the challenges can be positives (like being stuck in the snow - he found out he was no weakling!). It really is up to me to keep my outlook forever turned heavenwards. Then, the challenges we have during the day are immediately seen for what they are meant to develop in us - perseverance, endurance, patience...all that fruit we wish could come without the pruning! Perhaps we won't be able to bottle his life. We don't have to. Each one of us has this same fulfilling life right where we are.
Friday 6 February 2015
One-liners....
Here are a few things you would have heard if you'd been a fly on the wall in our house this week:
To my 6 year old girl, after being asked to do a chore she didn't like to do, "Please don't growl, it's not very feminine.
During family worship, from my 4 year old (of course), while praying, "Dear Lord, please help me not to be like "B" (our two year old). Will everyone be quiet! I'm trying to pray!!! And Lord, please help Mom to stop laughing so hard." Seriously, he said all that in one breath....
"J, (speaking once again to the 4 year old), if you keep doing that, I'm going to explode!" "Ok, go ahead!" Clearly, he wanted to see me explode!
That's only a few of the great quotes of the week.
These kids keep me on my toes and on my knees!
To my 6 year old girl, after being asked to do a chore she didn't like to do, "Please don't growl, it's not very feminine.
During family worship, from my 4 year old (of course), while praying, "Dear Lord, please help me not to be like "B" (our two year old). Will everyone be quiet! I'm trying to pray!!! And Lord, please help Mom to stop laughing so hard." Seriously, he said all that in one breath....
"J, (speaking once again to the 4 year old), if you keep doing that, I'm going to explode!" "Ok, go ahead!" Clearly, he wanted to see me explode!
That's only a few of the great quotes of the week.
These kids keep me on my toes and on my knees!
Wednesday 4 February 2015
Cats and Kittens, a Blessing from Above?
Our spazzy kitten is missing this morning. This kitten keeps us entertained, no joke, for hours. He is the son of the other two cats we own, so we have a happy family of 3 cats, all related. The male cat is the one who was stolen, neutered, vaccinated and then, ha, returned to us, to stay. He's a huge cat. The mother cat is a tiny little thing and, surprise, surprise, is pregnant again. I envy this cat - she takes the baby weight off fast and is very fertile, clearly. The kitten is tiny like his mom and was literally the runt of the litter. He tries to beat up his dad all the time and I'm telling you, there is no funnier thing in the world to watch.
Since his dad got neutered, sorry to say, he's lost all his manliness and fights like a....neutered cat. Before, he could have taken on a lion and won. Now he gets beat up by this little son of his and we all sit around and laugh our heads off.
First, we help the fight get started by putting them in the same room. It doesn't take too long after that. The little rascal will jump on his dad's head. The dad is so tolerant of this and will lie there for the first few minutes just taking it, but eventually, enough is enough and he suddenly turns on his son and the fight has begun.
We shut the baby gate and the other door and they can't escape. Then we just sit back, watch, and howl. It is truly one of the funniest things to watch as this tiny little kitten attacks this massive cat. Jump after jump onto the back of this beast, just to fall off and do it again. Then, we joke, it turns into "all-terrain" fighting where the big cat tries to get away from his annoying son and starts climbing the furniture. The little cat loves this. Then he scampers up the couch and leaps onto the big cat from a higher position. The big cat has the ability to finish the little one off in one fell swoop, but never does. It's almost as if they know this is just for fun and that they have an audience.
We film it, it's that funny. We started talking that it must be like what the Romans used to do, putting these sorry people in the middle of the Coleseum with lions and then considering it entertainment! I guess we aren't much better, oh dear.
This little cat is quite the wimp with the cold weather and absolutely stays inside. The older cats both wander around outside for a few minutes and then come back in eventually. My kids figure the little guy needs "character training". This involves 2 minutes of standing outside and then back in. Yesterday, he was taken out for his training session and then the kids either forgot about him or he found a spot in the barn to hang out, but he spent the whole night outside. Fortunately it wasn't as cold as the rest of the week, so I can only assume he'll show up sometime this morning, but boy, oh boy, our house will not be the same if something happened to him.
How does this possibly tie-in to debt-reduction???? Because these fluffy balls of fur are gifts from God! We absolutely love them and the hilarious personalities they have! We see them as an amazing way that God blesses us, for free, with their circus acts they perform each day (sometimes twice a day!) We laugh and laugh and never tire of their antics. We don't have to leave our house for this - we have a regular performance every day. Even writing about it shows me how important it is to count even these little blessings. The cats add so much to our life - our home is certainly busy and fun without them, but it is even funnier with them!
We're already looking forward to the next set of kittens so much. You want humour? Get 5 kittens in a room, shut all the gates again and watch out for a barrel of laughs as they attack each other and fall all over the place only to get up and do it all again. They never seem to tire of it and yet suddenly, you look over and they are all dead asleep. It's the funniest thing.
So, I can find joy even in cats. Being debt-free would bring us even more joy, but in the meantime, we've got cats!
We've been praying about garage doors for awhile and asking the Lord for a way to pay for them as they are becoming vitally necessary to RM getting his work done in the shop. When my husband went into his shop the day of the snowstorm, he could have sworn it had gone on inside the shop as there was as much snow inside as outside! But then, a couple of neat work-related things have shown us that maybe there is a way God is going to provide the money to pay for these doors after all.
He recently finished a contract where the people he worked for were very pleased with his work. They asked for a quote on some other work and, get this, they said they'll pay him in advance and he can do the work at his leisure! Who ever says that???? In advance? Never.
Then, several years ago when we built the house we had to pay a deposit on the land we bough to get it graded, etc. We were always supposed to get that money back and we fought for it for a long time even considering small claims court as we were getting nowhere with the people we were dealing with. Then yesterday, out of the blue, RM decided to give one more call to the contractor. Somehow he actually got in touch with him and the guy knew exactly what RM was talking about and said he would look into it. It sounded very positive. If that money came back to us along with the other contract, the doors could be paid for. It would sure be interesting if that happened as we thought we needed that money a long time ago. Maybe God had it set aside for us all along, knowing when we would need it most?
When we were at this 60s party the other night it was at a friend's house that had recently moved. Their other house that they had moved from was something else. It was huge, totally renovated with a glam kitchen, perfect landscaping, a pool, etc. They only had two girls living at home and they felt it was time to downsize. With the sale of that home they would be able to completely pay off their mortgage. They did it.
Their new house is on a much bigger property in a very beautiful area, but it is a much smaller home and doesn't have quite the glam, though they've renovated it, too (debt-free, I might add). I asked them about their new philosophy and the husband simply said, "It just makes sense! Why would you do anything on credit?" He was very matter-of-fact. The house is much smaller, but they don't need more space. The husband joked, "I'm not worried anymore if I lose my job. I have no expenses to worry about." In fact, he had lost his job recently and they celebrated by going on a cruise! Who can do that???????? I want to be able to celebrate like that!
We thought going to that party would have just been a little night out, but God uses everything. We ended up leaving that evening with another dose of inspiration to stay on track. And so we will....
Since his dad got neutered, sorry to say, he's lost all his manliness and fights like a....neutered cat. Before, he could have taken on a lion and won. Now he gets beat up by this little son of his and we all sit around and laugh our heads off.
First, we help the fight get started by putting them in the same room. It doesn't take too long after that. The little rascal will jump on his dad's head. The dad is so tolerant of this and will lie there for the first few minutes just taking it, but eventually, enough is enough and he suddenly turns on his son and the fight has begun.
We shut the baby gate and the other door and they can't escape. Then we just sit back, watch, and howl. It is truly one of the funniest things to watch as this tiny little kitten attacks this massive cat. Jump after jump onto the back of this beast, just to fall off and do it again. Then, we joke, it turns into "all-terrain" fighting where the big cat tries to get away from his annoying son and starts climbing the furniture. The little cat loves this. Then he scampers up the couch and leaps onto the big cat from a higher position. The big cat has the ability to finish the little one off in one fell swoop, but never does. It's almost as if they know this is just for fun and that they have an audience.
We film it, it's that funny. We started talking that it must be like what the Romans used to do, putting these sorry people in the middle of the Coleseum with lions and then considering it entertainment! I guess we aren't much better, oh dear.
This little cat is quite the wimp with the cold weather and absolutely stays inside. The older cats both wander around outside for a few minutes and then come back in eventually. My kids figure the little guy needs "character training". This involves 2 minutes of standing outside and then back in. Yesterday, he was taken out for his training session and then the kids either forgot about him or he found a spot in the barn to hang out, but he spent the whole night outside. Fortunately it wasn't as cold as the rest of the week, so I can only assume he'll show up sometime this morning, but boy, oh boy, our house will not be the same if something happened to him.
How does this possibly tie-in to debt-reduction???? Because these fluffy balls of fur are gifts from God! We absolutely love them and the hilarious personalities they have! We see them as an amazing way that God blesses us, for free, with their circus acts they perform each day (sometimes twice a day!) We laugh and laugh and never tire of their antics. We don't have to leave our house for this - we have a regular performance every day. Even writing about it shows me how important it is to count even these little blessings. The cats add so much to our life - our home is certainly busy and fun without them, but it is even funnier with them!
We're already looking forward to the next set of kittens so much. You want humour? Get 5 kittens in a room, shut all the gates again and watch out for a barrel of laughs as they attack each other and fall all over the place only to get up and do it all again. They never seem to tire of it and yet suddenly, you look over and they are all dead asleep. It's the funniest thing.
So, I can find joy even in cats. Being debt-free would bring us even more joy, but in the meantime, we've got cats!
We've been praying about garage doors for awhile and asking the Lord for a way to pay for them as they are becoming vitally necessary to RM getting his work done in the shop. When my husband went into his shop the day of the snowstorm, he could have sworn it had gone on inside the shop as there was as much snow inside as outside! But then, a couple of neat work-related things have shown us that maybe there is a way God is going to provide the money to pay for these doors after all.
He recently finished a contract where the people he worked for were very pleased with his work. They asked for a quote on some other work and, get this, they said they'll pay him in advance and he can do the work at his leisure! Who ever says that???? In advance? Never.
Then, several years ago when we built the house we had to pay a deposit on the land we bough to get it graded, etc. We were always supposed to get that money back and we fought for it for a long time even considering small claims court as we were getting nowhere with the people we were dealing with. Then yesterday, out of the blue, RM decided to give one more call to the contractor. Somehow he actually got in touch with him and the guy knew exactly what RM was talking about and said he would look into it. It sounded very positive. If that money came back to us along with the other contract, the doors could be paid for. It would sure be interesting if that happened as we thought we needed that money a long time ago. Maybe God had it set aside for us all along, knowing when we would need it most?
When we were at this 60s party the other night it was at a friend's house that had recently moved. Their other house that they had moved from was something else. It was huge, totally renovated with a glam kitchen, perfect landscaping, a pool, etc. They only had two girls living at home and they felt it was time to downsize. With the sale of that home they would be able to completely pay off their mortgage. They did it.
Their new house is on a much bigger property in a very beautiful area, but it is a much smaller home and doesn't have quite the glam, though they've renovated it, too (debt-free, I might add). I asked them about their new philosophy and the husband simply said, "It just makes sense! Why would you do anything on credit?" He was very matter-of-fact. The house is much smaller, but they don't need more space. The husband joked, "I'm not worried anymore if I lose my job. I have no expenses to worry about." In fact, he had lost his job recently and they celebrated by going on a cruise! Who can do that???????? I want to be able to celebrate like that!
We thought going to that party would have just been a little night out, but God uses everything. We ended up leaving that evening with another dose of inspiration to stay on track. And so we will....
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