We were at a funeral this past week for the father of one of my friend's. I made sure my oldest son was there as well as this man had become a mentor to him in his beekeeping. This older man was a master beekeeper and had taught my son all that he could in the few short years we knew him. He had also given him the skill of making candles from the bees' wax. One year he (my son) took over candle making at a children's camp for this older gentlemen, the week his wife passed away, and even that now seems like such a privilege my son was given.
You never know the time you have with someone could suddenly be cut short. So we are grateful to have known him. We discovered what a true servant this man was and how he had touched so many people through all the areas he served without ever seeking attention. He had a Ph.D., but most people never knew that they should be calling him "Doctor". Instead, most people could find him serving coffee at church or eating one of the pies he made for fundraisers or even eating his homemade bread. Truly a humble man, so glad we had the chance to meet him.
We are now kicking it into high gear for a family reunion event that we are hosting in less than a couple of weeks. I've vowed to keep my mouth shut and try not to nag my husband about all the things I wish we could have done in time for the day. Ha, I even had one of my daughters pray for me that I would be quiet and stop "reminding" him of my never-ending list. As opposed to this man I just wrote about, I am not quite as humble. Not getting all the things done on my list, however, will humble me. Instead of seeing a completely renovated house, they will see a house with no flooring, no trim, no walls, no paint. Instead of a perfectly landscaped house, they will instead be navigating awkward stairs (or no stairs in some cases) and uneven terrain. But, I've truly tried to let it go. The whole point of a family reunion is to spend time with family, to reconnect, to meet new family members that we've never ever known. My own kids don't even know who these people are! I can still hope for a miracle, but if no miracle comes, I will be fine with the house as is. I know one day it will be a little more completed! Maybe it will never even be completely done! That is fine, too.
One of the things that keeps us from finishing everything is that we do it all ourselves. That, of course, saves us a ton of money, but it also puts a lot of pressure on my husband who is not around much anymore. And, there is this new distraction out my kitchen window, called "The Vineyard". He's kind of preoccupied with it because if he loses the plants in this early stage it will be a huge loss, so I get it (the plants are actually doing great thanks to the big rain we got last week!). But, even if we had him home full-time, there just isn't the extra money, in addition to the time, to fix everything up. One area I had really hoped to spruce up was the front entry way. I'm not even really sure what I had hoped to do there, but I knew it was where most of us would be hanging out eating (it'll be a pig roast/bbq).
On the day I had asked my daughter to pray, I felt like I had truly finally released my "list". That's when it hit me, I suddenly got all inspired and got my two boys to come with me into the barn. I found 3 old barrels and had them roll them out to me one at a time. They weren't in the best of shape, but I kind of liked the vintage/barn/dirty look! Then, just like when I decorated my other patio on the side of my house, I started to look around and more and more things jumped out at me. I started to arrange them at the front of the house and placed the barrels on either side of the cement patio and added more and more objects surrounding the barrels that I picked out of the barn like bushel baskets for fruit, wine crates, fruit presses, and barrel rings that had fallen off the barrels. Suddenly, I had a nice little arrangement at the front of the house that spruced it up and made it quaint and once again, for free. I kind of laughed at myself. I walked out all the kids one at a time and made them look at it and told them to tell me how great it looked. They did! Is it coincidence that it all came together on that day? I suppose. It could be. I'd like to think I was "Holy Spirit Inspired" and that it was a gift to me, a reminder that releasing my desires is always followed by blessing. Another person might not have seen that as a blessing, but to me it was huge! It made me love my little entryway!
But back to my big list and all the other things I wanted done in time for the reunion. I had been getting quite upset that my stuff wasn't getting done. Last week I read in Luke 12 about the "Rich Fool". Jesus had warned the crowd, "Take care and be on your guard against all covetousness, for ONE'S LIFE DOES NOT CONSIST IN THE ABUNDANCE OF HIS POSSESSIONS."
Then Jesus told the story of the rich man who literally renovated his property to fit more stuff. He thought to himself if he just renovated than he would be happy (my paraphrase!) Ironically, he lived on a farm and had crops just like we do! But God said to him (and this is where is stings), "Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be? So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God." Ouch.
Lots of phrases jumped out at me when I read that passage. First of all "take care". I really have to be care-FULL. Careful about my motivations. Why do I want more stuff? Why do I want my list truly done? For me? I think it is ok to be good stewards of our things and get things in order around the house, but I have to keep my heart in check. I also have to be "on guard". The enemy is always trying to woo me into believing "if I just have this or get that or finish this then I will be happy". It is a form of covetousness for sure, because my ideas probably came from some magazine or driving by someone's house. I don't even know half the time where my crazy thoughts come from! "ALL COVETOUSNESS". Hmmmm....all covetousness....I asked the kids what they thought that meant and my daughter said, "It's when you're jealous of what someone else has." Yup, that's pretty much it. I just want what I don't have and I saw someone else have what I want. So pathetic!!!
"One's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." What does my life consist of then? The souls around me, not my stuff. I'm supposed to be "rich toward God", not towards my temporal goods. I couldn't believe the wording, "and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?" The things I have prepared.....It was almost like the Bible said, "And the things you want prepared for the reunion, whose will they be? Will they matter? In the big picture? Really?" No.
Does this mean I don't want to prepare anymore or that I should just sit around and let my place fall apart? No. Does it mean I can't enjoy my new little entryway look? No, I still love it. Can I still get more done? Yes, I'm still going to prepare. I'm still going to make it look as good as I can within reason, but I am going to "be careful" and "be on guard" that I don't ignore the souls around me in the name of getting my place ready. I'm going to be more intentional about identifying the lies that come into my head that always lead to discontentment. It's always a heart issue isn't it? Everything is. So that was when I had the kids pray for me. I confessed out loud, all these things to the kids. That was when I had my daughter pray about not being a nagging wife. I told them what my struggle was. They don't seem to notice or mind the messy undone house. It actually helps me keep things in perspective. I need their eyes.
I don't want to be called "fool".
Monday 30 July 2018
Friday 20 July 2018
Vines, Homeless Kids, and College
My husband is up early on his day off. Where is he? Watering the vines. But we are excited. The tiny little sticks that had no leaves on them are now growing little buds. It's hard to imagine that a little bud can get you so excited, but it does.
We have some neat mentors in this whole process, one of whom is our neighbour who grows around 30 acres across and down the road. She's a single mom/farmer who somehow does this all on her own. I admire her so much. She has taken a liking to us and shakes her head everytime we do something new and crazy. How can some city folk take on a huge project like a new vineyard? Yet we do, so instead of balking at our craziness, she offers her assistance. We actually caught her in the vineyard the other night checking out our soil and plants to see how they were doing, very funny.
But we've had some naysayers, too. One of our pruners heard my husband talk about the vineyard he was planning on planting. He immediately discouraged him. "Don't do it. Stick with your day job. Farming is hard work." My husband's response was, "I know it is hard work, but I still want to try." I'm very proud that he pushed back all the negativity and went ahead. This has made him come alive again as his day job is just that, his day job. We are so grateful for the work and the income, but it is not an easy environment to work in. His skill levels are not challenged the way he would like and that can leave him bored and prone to depression. But then he comes home and jumps on a tractor and voila - new person! So, I'm so grateful for the farm. He absolutely loves it. He said to me recently if he could go back and pick a different career he would have been a farmer. Wow.
The other thing he loves about farming in this day and age is that it's all precision farming. The vines were put in with a gps. Each vine has gps coordinates making them exactly parallel to the road. Being an engineer and studying this precision farming at the college, he loved it and appreciated it more than even maybe the old school farmers. Not the farming my great-grandparents did, yet it makes me appreciate what they did without all the high-tech gear.
So we had a funny change in our home yet again - two more homeless kids. My oldest son, 19, kicked out the two little boys out of his room. That was it. Enough was enough. There they were just like they were the last time, a couple of years ago, when my oldest daughter said the same thing, "Enough is enough. I need my own space." So, for the second time in a row, they had to pack all their belongings and move into the hallway with a pillow in one hand, a blanket in the other, and all their worldly possessions (i.e. bird nests, rock collections, fossils, etc.) on their backs. What was I to do with them? Last time we had them sleep on either side of our bed for a few months on the floor. But that was when they were little, now they were big. Wasn't an option.
My oldest son had been mentioning this for a while. But I just couldn't think of anything. I couldn't just build an addition. I couldn't put them in the hall. But I knew he truly needed the study space. I could see that his mental health was at stake as he was truly feeling overwhelmed by all their stuff, the noise, the fact he had no place to put all his textbooks. He had been a real champ at sharing a room with these little guys for so long. How many 19 year old young men say that they share a room with a 6 and 8 year old brother? I actually think it has created a special bond with the boys. But I could see he was starting to struggle as he has been planning all his courses for next year, needing a quiet place to go to, talking to academic advisors, etc. So when he came to me, I was weeding my (pathetic) garden (that's another story). But this time, I didn't dismiss him, I prayed. I stood on my hoe, closed my eyes and said, "Lord, what can I do? What do you want me to do? Is there a way to help my overwhelmed son? Is there a way to give him his own space and still give my little boys a place to sleep and play?" And then, suddenly, it came to me. The loft. I can move them all to the loft. My other son, 17, is up there with my 11 year old. But if I move the 17 year old into the 19 year old's room, I can then move the two little boys up to the loft with the 11 year old. They are small enough for all 3 boys to fit up there. The only reason we hadn't done that before was because they were too young to navigate the stairs in the middle of the night. I was always so afraid they would fall down the spiral staircase to their death! But they aren't babies anymore, they are 6 and 8!
I told the 19 year old and he loved it. He got the 17 year old and within minutes they had dismantled the whole bunkbed that had been taking up all the space. He spent the rest of the day cleaning the room and getting rid of all the boys stuff (into the hallway!) and just like that they were homeless.
I then approached the homeless children and told them my idea of moving them to the loft. They loved it! They took their belongings in 2 whole trips and moved in within minutes. The 11 year old was not as excited to sleep with these little rascals. He now sleeps on a couch! We just don't have enough beds or space! But who cares, it's working for now. I'm working my hardest on getting my older ones to eventually move out, so it is a short-term solution. The 17 year old also still sleeps on a different couch because we don't have a single bed for him yet, but again, short term and he doesn't mind. So my house is one funny place.
Last night my 6 year old told me, "You are ALMOST the best mom in the world!" "Almost?!" I said with raised eyebrows. "Ok, no, you are the BEST mom in the world!" What had I done to deserve the "Almost Best Mom" award? I took them fishing. I cannot believe that I did not know there was a fishing lake 20 minutes from my house. I only found out last night at 6:30 pm from a gas station attendant while we were getting gas and worms. I asked him if he knew of any good fishing places near here and he told me of a conservation area nearby. We had been planning on going somewhere else. This place was closer and way bigger (though it required a small fee). My kids nearly lost their minds with excitement. I actually did, too! It was so beautiful and so quiet, no one around, but tons of little fish. They caught somewhere close to 15 fish! They had to release them all, but it didn't matter, they had so much fun. So that is why I'm the "Almost Best Mom". I felt like it was a gift from God to find out about this place. Now, I'm thinking season's pass.....
One other funny change. Our 17 and 14 year old son and daughter still have some school to finish from this past year. They quit school a little early in May to go work at a greenhouse. They made good money, but didn't get all their school work done. We tried to work in the evening, but this didn't always happen. Then the greenhouse stopped needing them so much, so we took advantage of this slow time. I, again, was praying how to best guide them, how to best get them to get their work done, how to do everything best! This time, the genius idea came to my husband. He decided he would take them to work at the college! Perfect! They could work together in the library and literally be there working the same amount of time he was at work. That way there would be no problem getting their work done. At first they weren't too excited, but after we explained the logic of concentrated time, no distractions by these younger 4 running around, they bought into it and started to amazingly get excited. It's been only 2 days, but they are getting more done than they ever did here. That's another huge benefit of working at the college. When he was taken away from the home full-time a couple of years ago, I was so sad. He had less time with the kids, less time monitoring their lives, less time to disciple them. We started to see the impact, but now, we're seeing the college as such a blessing with these older ones. If he can't be at home with the kids, take the kids with him! "There's more than one way to skin a cat," he said. He gets to meet with them for breakfast, coffee, breaks, lunch.....he drives with them the 30 minutes, talking the whole way there and back about what they plan on accomplishing and then talks with them to whole way home to see what they got done. I love it. Another HUGE answer to prayer for me.
Today we water vines, pick up 250 bales of hay, pick up a new tractor (well, new to us) to go between the vines (our other one was too big) and maybe even go fishing again....always trying to be the "Almost Best Mom" ever.......
We have some neat mentors in this whole process, one of whom is our neighbour who grows around 30 acres across and down the road. She's a single mom/farmer who somehow does this all on her own. I admire her so much. She has taken a liking to us and shakes her head everytime we do something new and crazy. How can some city folk take on a huge project like a new vineyard? Yet we do, so instead of balking at our craziness, she offers her assistance. We actually caught her in the vineyard the other night checking out our soil and plants to see how they were doing, very funny.
But we've had some naysayers, too. One of our pruners heard my husband talk about the vineyard he was planning on planting. He immediately discouraged him. "Don't do it. Stick with your day job. Farming is hard work." My husband's response was, "I know it is hard work, but I still want to try." I'm very proud that he pushed back all the negativity and went ahead. This has made him come alive again as his day job is just that, his day job. We are so grateful for the work and the income, but it is not an easy environment to work in. His skill levels are not challenged the way he would like and that can leave him bored and prone to depression. But then he comes home and jumps on a tractor and voila - new person! So, I'm so grateful for the farm. He absolutely loves it. He said to me recently if he could go back and pick a different career he would have been a farmer. Wow.
The other thing he loves about farming in this day and age is that it's all precision farming. The vines were put in with a gps. Each vine has gps coordinates making them exactly parallel to the road. Being an engineer and studying this precision farming at the college, he loved it and appreciated it more than even maybe the old school farmers. Not the farming my great-grandparents did, yet it makes me appreciate what they did without all the high-tech gear.
So we had a funny change in our home yet again - two more homeless kids. My oldest son, 19, kicked out the two little boys out of his room. That was it. Enough was enough. There they were just like they were the last time, a couple of years ago, when my oldest daughter said the same thing, "Enough is enough. I need my own space." So, for the second time in a row, they had to pack all their belongings and move into the hallway with a pillow in one hand, a blanket in the other, and all their worldly possessions (i.e. bird nests, rock collections, fossils, etc.) on their backs. What was I to do with them? Last time we had them sleep on either side of our bed for a few months on the floor. But that was when they were little, now they were big. Wasn't an option.
My oldest son had been mentioning this for a while. But I just couldn't think of anything. I couldn't just build an addition. I couldn't put them in the hall. But I knew he truly needed the study space. I could see that his mental health was at stake as he was truly feeling overwhelmed by all their stuff, the noise, the fact he had no place to put all his textbooks. He had been a real champ at sharing a room with these little guys for so long. How many 19 year old young men say that they share a room with a 6 and 8 year old brother? I actually think it has created a special bond with the boys. But I could see he was starting to struggle as he has been planning all his courses for next year, needing a quiet place to go to, talking to academic advisors, etc. So when he came to me, I was weeding my (pathetic) garden (that's another story). But this time, I didn't dismiss him, I prayed. I stood on my hoe, closed my eyes and said, "Lord, what can I do? What do you want me to do? Is there a way to help my overwhelmed son? Is there a way to give him his own space and still give my little boys a place to sleep and play?" And then, suddenly, it came to me. The loft. I can move them all to the loft. My other son, 17, is up there with my 11 year old. But if I move the 17 year old into the 19 year old's room, I can then move the two little boys up to the loft with the 11 year old. They are small enough for all 3 boys to fit up there. The only reason we hadn't done that before was because they were too young to navigate the stairs in the middle of the night. I was always so afraid they would fall down the spiral staircase to their death! But they aren't babies anymore, they are 6 and 8!
I told the 19 year old and he loved it. He got the 17 year old and within minutes they had dismantled the whole bunkbed that had been taking up all the space. He spent the rest of the day cleaning the room and getting rid of all the boys stuff (into the hallway!) and just like that they were homeless.
I then approached the homeless children and told them my idea of moving them to the loft. They loved it! They took their belongings in 2 whole trips and moved in within minutes. The 11 year old was not as excited to sleep with these little rascals. He now sleeps on a couch! We just don't have enough beds or space! But who cares, it's working for now. I'm working my hardest on getting my older ones to eventually move out, so it is a short-term solution. The 17 year old also still sleeps on a different couch because we don't have a single bed for him yet, but again, short term and he doesn't mind. So my house is one funny place.
Last night my 6 year old told me, "You are ALMOST the best mom in the world!" "Almost?!" I said with raised eyebrows. "Ok, no, you are the BEST mom in the world!" What had I done to deserve the "Almost Best Mom" award? I took them fishing. I cannot believe that I did not know there was a fishing lake 20 minutes from my house. I only found out last night at 6:30 pm from a gas station attendant while we were getting gas and worms. I asked him if he knew of any good fishing places near here and he told me of a conservation area nearby. We had been planning on going somewhere else. This place was closer and way bigger (though it required a small fee). My kids nearly lost their minds with excitement. I actually did, too! It was so beautiful and so quiet, no one around, but tons of little fish. They caught somewhere close to 15 fish! They had to release them all, but it didn't matter, they had so much fun. So that is why I'm the "Almost Best Mom". I felt like it was a gift from God to find out about this place. Now, I'm thinking season's pass.....
One other funny change. Our 17 and 14 year old son and daughter still have some school to finish from this past year. They quit school a little early in May to go work at a greenhouse. They made good money, but didn't get all their school work done. We tried to work in the evening, but this didn't always happen. Then the greenhouse stopped needing them so much, so we took advantage of this slow time. I, again, was praying how to best guide them, how to best get them to get their work done, how to do everything best! This time, the genius idea came to my husband. He decided he would take them to work at the college! Perfect! They could work together in the library and literally be there working the same amount of time he was at work. That way there would be no problem getting their work done. At first they weren't too excited, but after we explained the logic of concentrated time, no distractions by these younger 4 running around, they bought into it and started to amazingly get excited. It's been only 2 days, but they are getting more done than they ever did here. That's another huge benefit of working at the college. When he was taken away from the home full-time a couple of years ago, I was so sad. He had less time with the kids, less time monitoring their lives, less time to disciple them. We started to see the impact, but now, we're seeing the college as such a blessing with these older ones. If he can't be at home with the kids, take the kids with him! "There's more than one way to skin a cat," he said. He gets to meet with them for breakfast, coffee, breaks, lunch.....he drives with them the 30 minutes, talking the whole way there and back about what they plan on accomplishing and then talks with them to whole way home to see what they got done. I love it. Another HUGE answer to prayer for me.
Today we water vines, pick up 250 bales of hay, pick up a new tractor (well, new to us) to go between the vines (our other one was too big) and maybe even go fishing again....always trying to be the "Almost Best Mom" ever.......
Monday 16 July 2018
Not Your Typical Vacation
Who has time to sit down and write anymore?! Not me. My mornings begin just as the sun is coming up. This is not by choice. I actually wouldn't mind sleeping in a bit, but the puppies, who are now 3 months old, tell me, through their yipping and yapping, it's time to wake up. I am the only one with ears to hear them apparently. Everyone else sleeps through it all. This starts the chickens clucking and then the older dog starts his wake up noises. It's enough to drive a person crazy. But, because I am the only one unable to sleep through it all, I have to get up. I am praying all these dogs will sell soon!
We will be animal-less soon, we think. We still have one cow, who will be leaving soon for the freezer. Next, it's the chickens. We love our chickens, but the eggs they lay are being eaten by the dreaded rats. We're going to get rid of the chickens we think for a bit, get rid of the rat population, and then re-start maybe next spring. We have one litter of kittens right now, leaving in a few weeks, and then hopefully the puppies any day. After that, we're going to take an animal breather and focus on all the other things going on at the farm.
This past week was my husband's week off. But, it was hardly a week off. He started by heading out to meet my nearly 17 year old in Alberta. He was there checking out a flight school as my son's career path has taken a complete switch-o-change-o and he's thinking "pilot" now. It was a neat opportunity as it was the very school my mom and uncle attended when they were in boarding school/high school. It now offers a missionary aviation program and that was what he was there to see. During the flight camp he got to fly 5 times (with an instructor) and I think it is safe to say, he loved it. Now, to decide if it is the school for him. It is very pricey so we are not ruling out any options yet.
Upon returning, the weather was hot and dry and that makes for perfect haying weather. So even though he would have liked to just relax, he jumped on a tractor and baled over 600 bales this past week in the killer heat. In the middle of all that he found time to get 5 acres and nearly 6000 vines planted in our field. Not your average vacation.
Fortunately we didn't have to plant the vines ourselves. He hired that out, but we had to do all the watering of each individual plant. That was a lot of work. These first few days after getting them in are like the first few days of a newborn's life - super critical. If they don't get the water they need, they won't make it. So my husband would drive the tractor that was pulling a tank of water. Then two of my kids would each hold a nozzle/hose and water each plant one by one. This was very time consuming as they had to keep going back and forth to fill up the tank.
But it makes us very excited as we've been planning this for a long time and it is hard to believe it's actually happening. It ups the value of our land instantly. It's definitely an investment for the future, both for ourselves and our children. Each year now we plan on putting in a few more acres, ultimately replacing most of the hay fields. It certainly doesn't look like a vineyard yet, but each year they will grow higher and higher and by the 3rd year, we should be producing grapes. Even though it seems like such a long time to wait for the benefits of planting a vineyard, we figure either way the time is going to pass, so we may as well invest our time and do something with our land. We see how quickly time goes.
It was another great project to have our kids involved in. Last night I told the kids how every plant they water isn't their dad's plant, but THEIR plants. They are helping us for sure, but I wanted them to know they are not just helping my husband and I in our retirement, but they are helping their own retirement. I certainly wasn't thinking about retirement at their age. Yet, it will creep up on them, too, one day.
We'll see if I get to write more this summer or if it will remain tricky....for now...I write when I can.
We will be animal-less soon, we think. We still have one cow, who will be leaving soon for the freezer. Next, it's the chickens. We love our chickens, but the eggs they lay are being eaten by the dreaded rats. We're going to get rid of the chickens we think for a bit, get rid of the rat population, and then re-start maybe next spring. We have one litter of kittens right now, leaving in a few weeks, and then hopefully the puppies any day. After that, we're going to take an animal breather and focus on all the other things going on at the farm.
This past week was my husband's week off. But, it was hardly a week off. He started by heading out to meet my nearly 17 year old in Alberta. He was there checking out a flight school as my son's career path has taken a complete switch-o-change-o and he's thinking "pilot" now. It was a neat opportunity as it was the very school my mom and uncle attended when they were in boarding school/high school. It now offers a missionary aviation program and that was what he was there to see. During the flight camp he got to fly 5 times (with an instructor) and I think it is safe to say, he loved it. Now, to decide if it is the school for him. It is very pricey so we are not ruling out any options yet.
Upon returning, the weather was hot and dry and that makes for perfect haying weather. So even though he would have liked to just relax, he jumped on a tractor and baled over 600 bales this past week in the killer heat. In the middle of all that he found time to get 5 acres and nearly 6000 vines planted in our field. Not your average vacation.
Fortunately we didn't have to plant the vines ourselves. He hired that out, but we had to do all the watering of each individual plant. That was a lot of work. These first few days after getting them in are like the first few days of a newborn's life - super critical. If they don't get the water they need, they won't make it. So my husband would drive the tractor that was pulling a tank of water. Then two of my kids would each hold a nozzle/hose and water each plant one by one. This was very time consuming as they had to keep going back and forth to fill up the tank.
But it makes us very excited as we've been planning this for a long time and it is hard to believe it's actually happening. It ups the value of our land instantly. It's definitely an investment for the future, both for ourselves and our children. Each year now we plan on putting in a few more acres, ultimately replacing most of the hay fields. It certainly doesn't look like a vineyard yet, but each year they will grow higher and higher and by the 3rd year, we should be producing grapes. Even though it seems like such a long time to wait for the benefits of planting a vineyard, we figure either way the time is going to pass, so we may as well invest our time and do something with our land. We see how quickly time goes.
It was another great project to have our kids involved in. Last night I told the kids how every plant they water isn't their dad's plant, but THEIR plants. They are helping us for sure, but I wanted them to know they are not just helping my husband and I in our retirement, but they are helping their own retirement. I certainly wasn't thinking about retirement at their age. Yet, it will creep up on them, too, one day.
We'll see if I get to write more this summer or if it will remain tricky....for now...I write when I can.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)