Thursday 9 November 2023

Trials Begin

Why are we shocked when things don't go as planned. Not even two days even there's a complication.  We had a permit for the pond from 2017 which is such a cool thing as we didn't know we would need it in 2023 when we first applied for it.  So we went ahead and started digging.  We were still waiting on Site Plan Approval for the buildings, but we figured we had the pond permit so we went for it.  We received some comments back on the on our application yesterday and one of the comments was from the fire department saying things that needed to be changed and no digging can start before those changes are made.  Oh dear.  At first, I felt a twinge of fear and then, I admit, doubt about my husband's choices crept in, which is a classic Satan move.  But then as we talked we really didn't panic too badly.  RM is masterfully dealing with the architect and the junior designer and is helping keep her in line as she keeps stepping out of line.  I'm not exactly sure what the attack was, but I think the bottom line for me is always fear and for RM it's epic physical pain from the workload he's carrying as he processed grapes till midnight the night before, received the grapes all day and then project managed the pond starting as well as managing the stained glass all at the same time.  Is he living his best life?  Yes, but it's taking a toll on him for sure.

How I pray that one day he'll be able to relax and not be in so much pain all the time.  I wish I knew if that was even a possibility.

How I thank God for my kids and how they come alongside him in his workload.  So grateful for them.  I've been reading in 1 John how if we abide in Him the He will teach us everything.  I surely need help teaching everything.  I'm quite overwhelmed by school, the amount of prep work and all the additional things on the side that I want to do in the church.  I'm asked daily if I will ever send them to school.  I don't know!  I sure  hope by abiding that I will know.  I'm in a bit of a desert wasteland, that's all I know

My heart condemns me all day long about so many things I'm insecure about from the order in my home, to my education choices, to the reno, involvement in church, etc., etc., 1 John speaks of how He can reassure our hearts and that He is greater than he who is in the world.  How I need that reassurance.

We'll be at Brock today for our son's university fair.  My prayer is once again that the Lord will guide.  So much uncertainty about next fall as well.  Praying, praying, praying

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