Monday, 26 August 2019

24 Years, Market Convos and Camp

Every summer I find myself anticipating something.  I never know at first what it is and then I remember.....September is coming!  That may make no sense as I LOVE SUMMER SOOO MUCH and I am ABSOLUTELY NOT wishing summer were over.  What I am anticipating is my one night away for our anniversary.  Because we don't get away very much it makes the one night just that much more fun and special which explains why I anticipate it for so many months!

This year we decided to go away a little earlier as our anniversary often falls on one of the most expensive weekends of the year - Labour Day.  Everyone is trying to get in one last vacation of summer so the prices go way up.  In order to avoid the extra cost we will go away tonight, early on in the week when prices are at their lowest.  Every year it is an expense that makes my stomach turn in a way, but we feel it is so worth it and we've always had food on the table even in spite of the cost.  My husband sees it as a requirement thank goodness.

I have to say, this past weekend at the farmer's market had to be my best day ever.  Not because I sold so many microgreens, no - that is not taking off at this point, though I do have my regular customers, so great! - but because of the people I get to interact with.  I am having so much fun meeting all these new people.  I must have a sign over my head that says, "This woman loves to meet you!" as I have so many amazing conversations.

This past weekend I introduced myself to my new neighbour.  We'd both been at the market the whole summer together, but our booths weren't together until this past weekend.  As we started talking I found out they used to live in the house beside us for years!  They are related to the couple who lives there now.  We were amazed at the coincidence and talked all morning about the history of the property.  I learned so much!

Then I was chatting with the other neighbour on the other side of me and just politely asked if they had a peach farm as that was what they were selling.  Seemed kind of obvious, but I just wondered if that was their main business.  The guy looked at me and said something like, "Oh no.  I'm an optometrist in town.  This is just one of the many side businesses we do."  Suddenly I knew who he was.  His clinic was where our whole family goes for our glasses and eye appointments!  He also owns the local coffee shop and youth center.  AND he runs the peach farm ON THE SIDE!!!  And horses!  I loved this guy.  I had finally found someone who we could completely relate to.  He had two of his boys with him and they were so nice.  One of the older boys, maybe 22, immediately went over to talk to my 9 year old and in a few minutes they were fast friends.  I love it when people treat my kids like they are human beings.

He could easily go home after a long day at the clinic and justify a long nap, but he goes home and pick peaches, or prunes trees, or mows between them.  Kind of sounded like my husband!  It made me feel like we aren't the only crazy ones with multiple things going on.  Turns out he also homeschooled his kids to highschool and it looks like he also adopted a special needs boy who was very sweet.  I could have talked to him for hours and wanted to meet his wife so badly!

As we got talking, I also realized we knew each other from our old church.  He had never gone, but I had met his parents and knew many of the people he knew as many family members of his go there still.  Turns out we both go to the same church now!  We just attend different services so we had never connected though they knew my daughter who plays piano and my son who had given his testimony about Africa the week before.  Amazing.  I walked away from all the conversations that morning so full.  I felt more connected to the community I was living in as well as to other believers who are so like-minded.  It was great.  That morning energized me all day.  I felt like I had had ten cups of coffee by the time I came home.  I had so much to talk about with my husband.  I couldn't have described a more perfect day.

Two of my kids came back from camp and I was so happy to see them so charged up as well.  Being with fellow Christian kids seemed to be just what they needed, too.  When you are on your own throughout the year except with the odd interaction here and there, it can get kind of lonely as camp doesn't run all year (if only!).  Hopefully this will reset them for the year ahead and that more kids will come across their path who are also like-minded.  When my oldest daughter came back 5 years ago from camp, it really changed her whole trajectory for life, so I'm hoping this will set the stage for them as well.  I'm grateful to see my younger kids already looking so forward to going.

Now for coffee.....

Wednesday, 21 August 2019

Seeing the Fruit and Homeschool Encouragement....for me

I wish I could follow my kids today.  The older two are off to meet the next two at their worldview camp.  Amazingly, my oldest son is the speaker tonight.  He just read me his talk and it was hard for me to not want to cry as I heard his own testimony of faith.  You never know as a parent if you are doing the right things, making the right decisions, especially when you aren't doing what everyone else is doing.  Yet today, he spoke out about all the different things we did, from homeschooling, to Bible quizzing, to the worldview camps, and he credited those as the major influences in his life that led him to where he is today in his faith.  Wow.  I can only thank the Lord for His grace in our lives as we hoped that would be the case, but had no experience.  I was going to write "no guarantee" except we had God's Word and His promises, but it was all by faith when we first made those decisions.  Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lord.

He was asked to speak tonight about his experience at university and how as a Christian he has made it through so far without losing his faith as the statistics say that most will walk away.  He had so many atheistic and evolutionary experiences in the last two years.  It truly is amazing that he has finished his second year somewhat unscathed.  These worldview camps have played a big role in prepping him and my other kids.  I'm grateful that years ago, some mom and her family, created the first camp as she wanted something like this for her kids, but it didn't exist so she started it up.  Thank you Gisele!  I actually ended up writing the creator of the camp to thank her personally as she didn't have to start up these camps.  She could have kept it all to herself, but she didn't and the impact of her making the decision to share her wisdom and knowledge blessed so many of us.

So, I don't get to go, but I wish I could!  I hate that they can drive now in some ways as I get excluded all the time!  Oh the irony.....I wish they could drive, is what I used to think.  Now, it's I wish they didn't drive???  Oh well...my son is off getting all his final vaccinations today for Africa.  Though we shouldn't be surprised, we are somewhat in shock that all his money came in - above and beyond what he needed.  But isn't that how God often does it?

My next few days will involve the final prep for my homeschool year.  Each year I feel overwhelmed and even full of panic as it doesn't come naturally for me to pick curriculum, to plan, to organize.  I just wish someone would do it for me.  But then I had some moms over that were at the beginning of their homeschool journey and I just need to listen to all the ways I encouraged them.  And I need to keep myself in the Word for the regular encouragement I receive when I read it.

I was reading 1 Thessalonians 1-3 this week and I swear Paul wrote it to a homeschooling mom.  There were multiple verses that jumped out at me.  Here's just a few:

"....remembering before our God and Father your work of faith and labour of love and steadfastness of hope....." - that is homeschooling in a nutshell - a work of faith, labour of love and a job requiring steadfastness of hope as there are days where it seems hopeless!

"....For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you...."  - He chose me to do this.  I know I'm loved by God.  I can do this.

".....also in power and in the Holy Spirit and with full conviction...."  - I cannot do this in my own strength.  It's fully impossible without His help.  And I must remember the "full conviction" I received so many years ago.

"....for you received the word in much affliction...."  - homeschooling can feel like much affliction almost on a daily basis.  Hardest thing I've ever done.  But why am I surprised at the affliction?  It's guaranteed!

"....but just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not to please man, but to please God...." - Oh yeah, I'm not doing this for the approval of man, but for God.  Great reminder.

"...but Satan hindered us...." - Yes, the enemy will try to hinder me.  He tries to hinder any good work that is trying to do something for the Kingdom of God.

"Therefore when we could bear it no longer...." Hmm, even Paul had days like that where he could "bear it no longer".  Even that phrase encouraged me that there are going to be those days ahead this year.

"...that no one be moved by these afflictions.  For you yourselves know that we are destined for this...." - that is my prayer for this year, that I will not be moved by those hard days, or the days of planning, but instead to know I'm destined for this.

"...for fear that somehow the tempter had tempted you....."  Oh yes, that happens a lot.  I sometimes listen to the tempter's voice that says all the lies that I start to believe about myself, my inadequacy, my insecurities, my fears....so many.  But that forms another prayer that I wouldn't be tempted by the tempter.

"For now we live, if you are standing fast in the Lord."  Another great prayer for the year - help me to stand fast in the Lord, not in myself.

"...as we pray most earnestly night and day that we may see you face to face and supply what is lacking in your faith."  Paul prayed night and day.  I should, too.  The people he was praying for needed him in person.  May God give me "in person" encouragement, too, this year, from other moms and other resources.  Those people lacked faith.  So do I.  May God give me what I need when my faith is lacking.

"Now may our God and Father himself, and our Lord Jesus, direct our way to you and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another...."  Perfect.  That's it!  I need God himself to run my school, in person.  He directed Paul's way to those people.  He can direct whatever He wants to me to help me, too.  He can increase my love for my kids and for what I do each day.  He can make my own kids' love abound for me and for each other.  In some ways, I'm off the hook!  It's not my homeschool, it's His.  It's not my job, it's His!  I do my part, He does the rest.  Whew.  The panic I felt before reading that dissipated.  Did Paul the apostle know when he wrote those passages that they would one day encourage a homeschool mom?  I don't think so, but God knew and I'm convinced those passages were there that day just for me.  

Little feet are running around now upstairs.  My quiet prep time is over.  I'll have to send them outside all day.....

Monday, 12 August 2019

One Hard Day....

Yesterday goes down in history as one of the hardest days of our lives.  Our beloved dog, Zena, got hit by a motorcyle and had to be put down.  The motorcyle had shattered her leg in multiple places and the it would have required bone reconstruction costing thousands and thousands of dollars not to mention the many trips to a clinic.  The next best option was amputation, but that was also very expensive and would have limited her life so terribly.  She could never have had puppies again.  We don't even know the extent of her internal injuries.

The worst part was the lack of empathy from the driver who was screaming at my son calling him "an unfit dog owner".  We take full responsibility that she got out of the house and happens to love chasing bikers.  She got away on us and though we chased her at full throttle, we couldn't catch up.  The bikers had a chance to stop at the stop sign and let us retrieve her, but they wouldn't stop.  They were all ready yelling at us and the dog.  After they hit her, the yelling started while my son had to scoop her up off the street into his arms, bloodied and battered.  The lack of compassion was terrible even though my son apologized.  They did not, however, apologize, and took off leaving us with a wounded dog.

Once again, another medical emergency and my son was a star.  He handled it so well, even though she was his baby.  He paid for her and he owned her.  He lovingly rushed her off to the emergency vet clinic with my daughter and they were there when the awful decision to euthanize was made.  They sobbed through the whole ordeal as did we at home. 

Never was a dog so loved.  Never was a dog so human.  She had habits that were so unusual.  She would "hug" you each time she saw you.  She wanted to get as close as she possibly could to you.  If you stopped petting her, she would nudge your hand to keep going.  She would drive us crazy as well, by all the barking at cyclists, bikers and walkers and she certainly destroyed many parts of our house with her nails on window sills and doors, but of course, now we would give anything to have her back - to hear one more bark.

She gave my son two great litters of puppies and helped him through school.  It is uncertain how he will pay for his next year now as she was a big part of paying for that!  She had her own instagram fan page by all of my kids where they regularly accepted submissions from each other!  Even today they are still crying about her.

How and why do these things happen?  We don't know.  We don't understand.  We just try to thank God for her and for the joy she brought to our family for the short 3 years we had her.  She is truly irreplaceable.  There won't be another dog like her who loved us so much, more even than we loved her, if that's possible.  We had predicted this was how she would die....at the wheel of a biker, but of course, we never thought it would actually happen.

All of us had an awful sleep last night and still have headaches today.  Waking up this morning was hard.  She wasn't there to greet me.  But she rarely got up when I did.  If dogs can sleep in, she did.  She wouldn't wake up until the kids did.  She has left her mark everywhere in the house.  All sorts of reminders of her.  No more waiting for us at the door when we pull in.  No more sweet face wherever we go in the house. 

Yet we are so grateful it wasn't a child or even the driver of the bike or his rider.  It could have been worse.  We know that and are so thankful for what we were spared from.

What is God preparing my son for when he heads to Africa?  I'm sure God will  use even this experience.  I asked him how he remains so calm when there is such a hurt animal in his lap.  He said he just thinks to himself how much she needs his help and how he must remain calm in order to help best.  That will help him in a medical emergency for sure.  Where was I the whole time?  Hiding.  Again.  I can't handle the gore.  I can't handle the sadness or seeing something or someone in pain.  I wanted my last image of her (thinking she was coming back that night) to be a happy one.  I will not be a doctor one day.  Hiding isn't a good characteristic of a doctor.

Today we are doing hay.  It is good in a way, keeps our minds busy, off Zena.  So many kind notes, texts, all about Zena.  So many people understand that a dog is truly like a member of the family.  I never understood that until now.  One of the kids' friends is over helping.  I honestly think he's here just for moral support.  It's so touching to see how the kids are being supported by others' kind messages.  It is what is helping them through.  None of them wanted to go to work today.  They were too afraid of breaking down in front of their co-workers and being asked too many questions, but it is good to reflect and to talk about her.

Dogs.  Strange companions and friends.  Created by God for our enjoyment.  Now, we mourn, but we recognize she was a dog, not a human so we're so glad we were spared that loss.  It has been a great experience for our kids to go through because it shows they have hearts, they love, they choose to make close connections and relationships.  That's why it hurts so much.  One of my children said, "I have no more tears to cry" as she just lost a cat a few weeks ago.  But this is life - life and death.  It somehow makes it more full and meaningful, so even though we lost our sweet dog, I'm grateful for how long we had her and what we can learn even in her death.

Thursday, 8 August 2019

The Lemonade Stand

I'm going to call my new book The Lemonade Stand.  I cannot believe how many interesting people I have met through this little business my kids have set up at the end of our driveway.  Not only is it extremely successful (they made probably over a hundred dollars in the last few weeks), but it is making friendships as well.

There was the lady we met who was born and raised in the same town as my dad...what a bizarre coincidence!

Then there was this older couple who stopped last week and turns out his grandfather was once the treasurer for the mission my son is going with to Africa!  We couldn't believe it when we found that out.  I immediately invited them to my son's fundraiser and unbelievably, they came!  What a great time!  They ended up meeting my parents and having a great chat!

On Sunday, another lady stopped as she was somewhat lost and looking for a road nearby.  She was a lovely Christian lady who just needed to chat.  She ended up giving me her whole family's history as well as the history of the area.  She wanted to be best friends when she left and get all connected on social media.  She must have hung out for 15 minutes or more....Hilarious!

On another occasion another older man stopped and I ran over to see who it was.  He wondered why I came over, maybe because I didn't trust my kids to do the proper lemonade math?  I said, "No, I just love meeting the people they sell lemonade to!"  We got into a conversation about where he lived and who he was and within a few seconds he was all choked up.  His wife had died a couple years earlier and he said he drives back and forth all the time to go visit his daughter who lives nearby.  He could barely talk he was getting so emotional.  I was so touched to see how he must have missed her so much.  He told me a story about how the town had asked him if the Bruce Trail could go behind his house.  I assumed he said yes so that he could see people.  He said, "No, it's because of the interaction."  He's just like me.  He loves to interact with people, not just "see" them.  It's a way to deal with his loneliness.  He drove away almost immediately because he couldn't talk more.....so sad!

Another time, a couple drove by and stopped and bought some drinks.  We got to talking and it turns out they drive by all the time, too.  The husband said, "I love seeing your kids playing outside.  It warms my heart."  You never know when you are being watched!!!  They got out of their car and we kept talking.  Turns out they homeschooled all their kids, too, and are also Christians.  Now that their kids are mostly grown they enjoy their drives in the country and we happen to be on their route!  By the time they left we had shook hands and introduced ourselves formally...new friends!

One guy drove by in a huge contractor truck.  He didn't even get a drink.  He just gave the kids $40 for no good reason!  If he only knew that went right into the Africa fund.  He contributed probably just because God told him to!  It made no sense!  We couldn't believe it and like that he was gone.  We figure he was a contractor angel!  My kids' mouths were open as they ran over, "HE JUST GAVE US $40!!!!"  Wow.  Why?!  What made him do that?!

One time, a young family pulled over, all riding bikes together.  I had noticed them earlier as the mom drove a tandem bike with her down syndrome daughter on the back.  I had thought to myself, "How adorable!"  When they pulled in, the husband suddenly said to me, "Did you go to Lorne Park?"  Uh yeah.....that was my high school.  Then he introduced himself....we had hung out years ago when I was in my final years of school.  I immediately recognized him and we had a great laugh.  Now we were all grown up with kids, wives and husbands.  We introduced our families and had a great chat.  It is so funny.  Of all the people, all the places.  I couldn't believe it.

We have "regular" customers now.  When we aren't open we hear the cyclists lament, "You're closed?!"  We'll have to hire full time staff eventually.  So funny.

Now, when someone pulls up, I honestly feel it is because God has told them to stop.  They often comment, "We just felt like we had to turn around and come back!"  One of the older couples told me after they left our stand that they just looked at each other and said, "What just happened?!"  The experience seems to be surreal even to those who come.

When we counted how much we had made between the lemonade stand and the kitten money, it came to around $600!!!!  What an amazing blessing for my kids to see how God is using such small things to make such a difference in my son's fundraising.

My son who's been fundraising all summer is now nearly fully there....just a little left to go.  Though there have been times of discouragement, for the most part it has been an amazing time of seeing God work.  He continues to use the "little by little" way which seems to be the most powerful.  People always apologize if they aren't giving large numbers.  I always stop them.  It is the little gifts that I believe are making the difference.  My kids sell lemonade for 50 cents for a small cup...how does that add up so quickly?!  God has truly multiplied their money and more often than not, people are often giving beyond what the kids charge.....so amazing.

So, The Lemonade Stand....will it be a best-seller?!  Probably not!  All I know is that I love this little business that happens at the end of our driveway.  It has become one of my favourite things about this summer.  I have met so many amazing people, neighbours and new friends and I have seen miracles happen and connections made that would never normally happen.  I have seen money raised that I never expected.  All we do is sit there and then watch and wait.....

Thursday, 1 August 2019

End of Goat Camp, Unusual Swim Test and New Boots

Goat camp ends today and what a funny week it was.  I was very open to being the one who did all the milking.  I had been told by all my kids that they were NOT doing it, but ironically, I ended up having to fight to milk the goats as they were often the ones fighting over who would get to milk them.

My 9 and 12 year old boys became "expert goat milkers".  I couldn't believe how fast they were at it by the end of the week.  I had big plans for the goat milk so it was super frustrating when the goats would accidentally put one of their goat legs in the milk.  After that it went to the animals, which made them super happy.

I did end up making goat cheese, but got some wrong information and it didn't turn out perfectly as I had hoped.  I think I managed to salvage it, but I could really use another week's worth of milk to get it ideal! 

When you make goat cheese you are left with tons of leftover whey.  With that you can make ricotta, it's amazing!  So I got all "homesteady" and made ricotta cheese, too.  There is still tons of leftover whey and that can still be stored for 6 months in the fridge.  That can be used in tons of things from drinking it for all the good bacteria to using it for fermenting vegetables.  I will hopefully do that this week coming up.

This week was also a very unusual swim test for my 20 year old son.  Gone are the cute little days when you have to do a lap of front stroke across the pool and then tread water for a minute in the deep end.  This week he had to swim to the bottom of the beluga whale pool, 30 ft. deep, in 10 degree water (in a wet suit, but it still took his breath away he said).  Then he had to swim the length of the pool, while holding his breath the whole time.  That doesn't sound so bad except that this test took place WITH ALL THE BELUGA WHALES SURROUNDING HIM THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!  Beluga whales are not known to attack humans, though they have the teeth to do so, but it was still a little disconcerting for me to think about what he was doing that day.  Fortunately he did some research on how to swim deeply so that you don't pop your eardrums, so he knew how to do that.  He had never done it in such cold water before.  He is apparently the first one to ever pass the test on the first time.  Impressive.  He said swimming beside the belugas was pretty wild as you don't really know how big they are until you are right beside them!  You don't say!  I have no interest in learning that first hand!

If I had known he'd be doing that kind of a swim test years ago, I would never have been nervous about the little tests he took when he was six.  What a difference a few years make.

Yesterday he was hosting a bonfire for a few friends from work.  As a nice supportive family we tried to tidy up the property during the day so it would look decent for his friends.  I was the main weed whacker as I can't seem to get the kids to do it to the level that I want.  I walked around wearing brand new-to-me rubber chicken-printed boots.  That's a story in itself.

For weeks I had been wishing I had a pair of boots that weren't my kids' boots!  That may sound strange, but I couldn't bring myself to buy any.  When it seems like every dollar counts, I was ok to keep wearing my kids' boots.  I would look at the thrift stores, but never saw what I wanted or needed.  It was no big deal.  I would be fine.  Meanwhile, I either wore, like I said, my kid's footwear or my worn out birkenstocks.  Not ideal.

One day I showed up at my sister's to visit with her, my mom and the cousins.  My mom came in holding a bag, which I assumed was a gift for one of the kids.  She said, "No, it's for you!"  Inside was a brand new pair of boots, bright yellow with chickens all over them - super cute.  She said her friend had bought them and never used them and she wondered if I could (or maybe if my mom knew of someone who could use them, not sure).  All I know is that I had never mentioned this seemingly insignificant request to anyone.  But suddenly there I was with a pair of boots, probably exactly what I would have needed or wanted.  These kinds of stories happen to us regularly and often with shoes involved!  Someone will show up with exactly what we are needing in our size.  I know, I know....coincidence.  But not to me.  As always, I find it a personal reminder just to me, to no one else, that God cares about me and even what I wear on my feet.   Yesterday as I walked around in my new boots, I felt blessed.  God had given me a new pair of boots!  I hadn't told anyone, but someone out there thought, "Hmmmmm.....I'm not using these.  Someone could use them.  Who?"  And my name, not anyone else's name, came into their mind and they ended up on my feet.  I love that.