My Shepherd All My Life Long To This Day

I don't think I've ever taken a break from writing this long ever.  Not because I didn't have a ton to write about that's for sure.  No, there's just been too much going on.  The garden has definitely taken over a lot of my time, but that's not all.  The vines, which are supposed to just grow on their own, quite simply, don't.  So we have all found ourselves in the vines way more than we anticipated.  We often look at ourselves and say, "Why did we do this again?"  Oh, and hay.  Yes, lots of hay.  Around 3000 bales that someone magically has to pick up.  I never was on any hay team before, until last year.  Now, they all just expect me to help!  I didn't sign up for that.  I now have shoulder muscles, that's new.

I think the main reason I'm more involved and have definitely become a farmer is because my youngest ones aren't so young anymore.  The youngest is 8 and there is just something about that age that makes them big.  I'm actually not in the house a lot of the day anymore and they just operate on their own.  They can make their own food, clean their own messes, find their own ways to entertain themselves, etc.  and I just stop in throughout the day to check in on them to make sure all is good and that they are alive and well.  They will help when they can either in the garden or the vines, but a lot of the time the work isn't really kid-friendly.

One of the things that makes me SUPER happy is how they have learned to keep themselves occupied.  I remember as a kid watching a little cartoon here and there, but for the most part I stayed and played outside ALL DAY.  I was really hating how kids couldn't seem to do that anymore, but this summer has definitely been the summer of being outside all day.  A couple days ago my son said, "Today my goal is to be outside the whole day and only go in to go to the bathroom."  I loved that!  And I'm sure he succeeded.  We put the TV away back in February or even before that and the only way to watch something is if we pull out a laptop which has become quite rare this summer.  Having such a warm summer has definitely helped.

Every summer I pray for a pool.  Every summer I try to will someone to drop one off at our house.  It never happens.  But, even without a pool, it's been fine.  We have a few friends who invite us over and we have gotten really creative with the sprinkler.  I know pools are great, but they are also a lot of work and expense and I think this has been the test for all of us to be content, so I'm kind of glad God hasn't answered that prayer.

All the older kids are back at work and are gone a lot of the time, so the amazing always-together-family-time came to an end, but it was ok.  We really enjoyed having them around, but they do need money, so we get that.  The two oldest are still in the final throes of the two biggest exams of their lives.  My daughter will be playing for her practical piano exam in these next two weeks.  At the same time my son will be writing his medical exam in August.  The intense piano playing and the intense studying is amazing to watch.  We always have to be quiet around the house whenever she is recording her pieces and whenever he is studying.  How I pray they will be successful in light of their diligence. 

I've learned so much by watching their approaches.  I've noticed they are both taking a similar approach and I have a feeling I will be adjusting my whole approach to homeschooling differently based on how they are both preparing themselves.  It's amazing.  My daughter's teacher has her record all 7 pieces of her music in a row, taking about 45 minutes.  She then can critique each piece, pausing it whenever she notices a mistake.  She records this at least once a day.  I would have just played and played all pieces and then the day of the exam sat and recorded.  By preparing the entire recording every single day when she actually has to send in the recorded exam (there's no in-person exam thanks to covid), she will be so ready because she's done it so many times that she won't even flinch.  Same with my son, I would have studied and studied every day and then hoped I was ready and then written the exam.  He, on the other hand, takes a practice MCAT every single week - that is a 7 HOUR EXAM!!!!  Who does that?!  As the exam gets closer he'll take one every other day or something crazy like that.  But, by doing this, he'll be so mentally prepared for the length of the exam and he'll be so used to taking them, that he'll be ready and will do much better.  He's already seen his score improve dramatically each week.  I'm learning so much by watching them. 

I'm about to go weed in the garden.  It's going to be hot, so better to go out now.  I don't know what today will hold.  So many days go by blending one day into another.  Some days seem like just regular days, then others have a little more going on, even drama.  Yesterday was one of those more dramatic days....we had a terrible situation with one of our mama cats.  The poor thing had delivered two kittens and then her labour just stopped.  There were clearly more kittens inside, but she must have had complications that we didn't know about.  How we prayed she would be able to have them, but she was too weak.  We found her dying in the basement, leaving behind two orphaned kitties.  Thankfully, the nearby shelter took them in and they were placed with another nursing cat mom.  We also had two bee stings yesterday which added to the drama.  I have learned this summer a phrase that I now say all the time, "There's more going on here".....These harder days can be stressful and I find myself wondering why they happen.  But then I remember the spiritual element of life.  I remember there is a spiritual realm.  I remember there is a force out there that longs to see me stressed.  (My son got shingles from stress this summer which then gave my other son chicken pox.....not fun!)  As soon as I recognize that "there is more going on here", it helps diffuse the situation.  It helps me remember to fight back with prayer, gratefulness and worship.

As we reflected on our very tough day yesterday, we tried to see how God had been in our day even though we had all felt so sad for our kitty.  It was actually an answer to prayer that she passed so peacefully.  I had called around to all the vets and tried to get a price on c-sections, x-rays, euthanizing her, etc...it was anywhere from $500-1700.  That was WAY out of the ballpark.  I thanked God that she passed on her own and quickly.  I thanked God that the shelter took the kitties for just $50.  I thanked God that the boys got stung, but nothing too serious.  Reflecting that way helped us all so much see, yes, God was there, even in all the distress.  I don't love drama, so I'm hoping it'll be a calmer day today, with just a few weeds instead of dying cats.  I could barely handle that.

If I could write a theme for this summer it would be "Great is thy faithfulness" - God has been truly faithful.  I've been going through Genesis for a while now and yesterday my favourite verse was in Genesis 48:15, "....the God who has been my shepherd all my life long to this day......"  I've seen that all summer, every day, in all our situations we've gone through....God has been my shepherd all my life long to this day.