The First Tests

You had to know this post was coming -

Remember, it hadn't seemed so bad????  Well, it seemed like it wasn't going to be so bad, trusting God to help us to stay disciplined, but we knew better.  I had warned the kids the day we decided to do this that we would get tests and probably right away.  I was right.

I get invited to homeschool field trips fairly regularly and if they are close to me and of interest, almost regardless of cost, I sign up.  And so I did, as soon as the Chocolate Factory field trip came across my screen, though it was quite costly, I didn't even think about it.  Earlier on in the month, before we made the vows, I also signed us up to hear the latest homeschool phenomenon who is being compared to Celine Dion.  She was coming to a local church near us and the tickets were quite reasonable, but not when you added up how many of us would be going.  Now I had decisions to make and I didn't like that.  These weren't supposed to be tests for me, but for the kids. 

As for the chocolate factory, I thought, ok, I'll back out of that, but I won't tell the kids I've done that, as I hadn't told them about the trip yet anyway, so less pain.  As for the singer, I thought I would get the kids' opinions and see what their reactions would be.

Each morning, in our homeschool, we start the day with prayer and often I will bring a passage of scripture that the Lord has used to speak to me.  This time it was the passage in Malachi 3:9, 10, "You are under a curse - the whole nation of you - because you are robbing me.  Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house.  Test me in this, "says the Lord, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it."   Apparently, this is the only passage in scripture where God says you can test him and it is in the area specifically related to finances.  I explained this to them.  They were listening intently.

That's when I brought in the kicker - what should we do about field trips?  No response.  Then I asked specifically about the singer.  At this point, a sleepy #4 had just entered the room and was just getting in on the conversation.  I asked the oldest girl, who loves music and was very much looking forward to seeing this girl sing, what she thought.  Should we go?  No, she shook her head.  As I looked across the room and asked Miss Sleepy, there were already tears in her eyes - no, she said quietly, through her tears.  It ripped my heart out, but I was so proud to see they were getting it.

Then, somewhat without intending to, I brought up the chocolate factory field trip - another HUGE favourite for my oldest daughter, and told her I had taken us of the list.  This one hurt even more! 

When a friend of mine heard this story she asked me, "What?  No field trips?  How can you do that?!"  "Don't you see?" I told her, "This is the problem!  We've never said no!  We've always said yes which is how we find ourselves in this predicament in the first place!!!!" 

Another friend reminded me of what Dave Ramsey calls "blow money".  This is where you set aside a very small amount of cash to spend on the odd thing here or there, such as a coffee out or perhaps even a little resaurant treat, or whatever it is you think you must have while you are on the journey of paying down debt.  The idea being that you won't lose your mind if you have that little out once in awhile.  When I mentioned that to RM, he laughed - uh, no - we spent that blow money ages ago!

For the first time, and I think I really mean first, in our lives, we were actually practising (get ready for this, it's kind of a rude word).....self-denial.  There I said it.  Out loud.  I do not think that word is even used anymore, nor understood, or even practised.  Why?  Because it means you can't have something when you want it!  WHAT????!!!  Impossible.  Oh yes.  It means delaying gratification.  WHAT??!!  You mean to say, I can't have something right away?  But what if I really want it?  No.  This is just too much to take in, isn't it? 

Well, it was for me to until I realized the damage it causes to give in, to not practise restraint, especially if you are using the bank's money - it slowly, kind of like plaque on teeth (sorry, gross example, but true) builds up and guess what - it causes a cavity or damage that you don't see, but one day you feel pain and sometimes, at this point, the damage can be irreversible - a house can get taken away, bankruptcy can be filed - it's ugly.  If you only brush occasionally and never floss, spending not too much, but little self-denial, then you'll get warning signs that something is wrong - pain here and there, signs of stress slowly showing itself in your life.  However, if you pay attention to the daily brushings, to take the analogy a bit further, and maybe even be so disciplined to floss (imagine!), then you'll never have to see that dentist and you'll be left with a set of teeth you own, your very own teeth! 

Galatians has much to say on this.  Galatians 6:7, "Do not be deceived:  God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.  The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sow to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life."  So you see, sowing to please my sinful nature can ultimately lead to destruction, financial and spiritual.  It just isn't worth it to me anymore.  I will not give in! - too much is at stake, my husband's hard-earned money, my children's souls and any future spending habits they pick up from me....this is what keeps me going and staying on track.

Now the truth is, we do hope and pray that one day we will be out of debt, so, before you feel too sorry for us and think we are denying our children fun field trips, I did tell them that once we are out of debt, there are a few field trips we will do right away!  Going to the chocolate factory will definitely be one of them, probably the first!  As well, the first cd we'll buy or the first concert we'll go to will be that homeschool singer's!  But knowing how God works, the singer will probably coincidentally be singing in our town the week we get out of debt and the chocolate factory will have some huge chocolate sale that same week.

So, the tests are coming, fast and furious - they are child-size and adult-size, but we are taking them one by one and the Lord is getting the victory.  Praise God!