A couple days ago I had multiple opportunities to pray as I cleaned up around the house. My heart felt a certain heaviness that was almost palpable, a heaviness for just about everything I was praying for. Again, I just went through all the things I was praying for and then at the end I said, "Just help me to see You somehow today - show me your miracles. Help me to see You are working!"
The first miracle was one that is so obvious, but it really struck me the more I thought about it.... the miracle of birth. My friend delivered her 8th baby yesterday, the first one at home. It almost didn't happen though and this is where the miracle came in. This is also why I love midwives so much. The labour had gone on for two nights and the mom was losing strength to finish and push the baby out. She had dilated almost to 10 cm but the contractions weren't coming. The midwife knew she needed just a little bit of oxytocin, but the problem was she was a vbac and the doctor at the hospital wouldn't give that to a vbac. Knowing this, the midwife consulted with another midwife and she reminded her, "If you go now she'll be going in an ambulance." And, I think everyone knew it would end in a C-section. A genius idea came to the midwives - just give her a little saline solution to rehydrate her and some honey! It worked! She dilated to 10 cm, she got enough strength back to push the baby out with virtually no contractions and voilà! A baby! When I saw her at home a few hours later, I said to her, "You know you just got 2 months of your life given back to you!" If she had had the C she would have been incapacitated for almost 2 months. It's hard to imagine, but it's true. I was so happy for her that it turned out to be just a regular birth at home where she didn't need to move or do anything afterwards - definitely a miracle.
That was just at 9 am! There was more to come! The day wasn't over yet! After dinner sometime, I got this awesome text with a picture of a finger and a shiny diamond ring - it was Jen, she was officially engaged! Those two had been secretly planning their wedding for weeks, but couldn't say anything until they got the ring.... but they wanted to make sure they had the hall booked and the date they wanted which, amazingly they got, even though they'll be married in such a short time - June 20! Having something to look forward to each year is awesome! I thought it was just going to be my 20th anniversary which is big enough I suppose, but a wedding? That's even more fun!
The planning is beginning and, fortunately for all my daughters, they will be a big part of the planning. She's having them all involved in some way including the little prayer warriors - the 6 and 11 year olds - so sweet..... the flower girl and the junior bridesmaid. She's taking a risk, but she's having Jonas (I've already written his name, so why not call him his name..... ) be the ringbearer! I warned her, he might take the rings, run down the hall and either throw them down a grate or out a window, but he's so darn cute that she's willing to take the risk! I would, too. He's already praying each day about his big job - "When do I do this? Is it before or after my birthday?" Very cute.
I marvel at God's answer to prayer in both Jen and Roger's lives and found myself just praising God all day as I walked around the house thinking about what had happened in such a short time.
How can anyone doubt the goodness of God when such amazing miracles like birth and weddings are going on all around me? Unfortunately my humanity is surprisingly weak. My faith is growing undoubtedly, but the attacks don't stop. As I've written before most of the attacks that are happening to us right now were going on in almost the exact same way at the exact same time last year. I'm sure RM walked in last year and said what he said to me yesterday, "Just got the corporate tax email." I'm sure it was for the same amount and everything. I'm sure we both worried if we'd be able to pay it. I'm sure it came on probably the worst day to get it last year, too. Yesterday, when he got the email from his accountant it came after a series of blows that happened in the morning alone - machines not working properly, animal crises, problems on a job-site, kids screaming, mommy pulling her hair out..... is there ever a good time to get an email telling you that you owe a large sum of money?
But I reminded RM of how our life is simply repeating itself year after year and how last year we somehow were able to pay the bill. Last year, we probably had an animal crisis, too. Last year we had problems on the job-site. Our kids still run and scream, but they won't forever and quite frankly, screaming is a good sign that they are alive and not sick in a hospital. I'm sure parents of sick children wish their children could run and scream. Last year, whatever we struggled with we got through by God's grace which means this year we will also make it, by God's grace only.
It's helpful to look back, to reflect. If I didn't, I think I would be stuck in today and I would panic. When I wasn't feeling so great during all the "blows" yesterday I remembered the old way I would have handled it. I would have stayed in a stressed state for who knows how long. I would have only gotten out of the state when things seemed resolved. Yesterday when RM saw me entering into that state he said, "Look, I'm telling you what's going on, but you know things will work out. They always do. You don't need to panic. I just need you to listen to me." And that was my "back to reality" moment where I grabbed my thoughts, quickly took them captive, stopped where the stress wanted to take me and just accepted the fact that God was in control despite all appearances. Just like that, my day went on. We went before the Lord in prayer as a couple and then later as a family.
Nothing had particularly changed in our lives. The bill still needed attention. But eventually the work crisis subsided, the machine started working again, the animals got taken care of and all was right with the world once again.
Even before all had settled down, I'd read with the kids from Nehemiah that morning. It was so good to see how Nehemiah handled stress. When he first found out that the walls of Jerusalem were broken down, he immediately fasted and prayed. He confessed and repented his part. Ok, good, check, I'm doing that. When he went before the king as cup bearer and appeared sad, the king asked him what was wrong. He explained why. Then the king asked him, "What are you requesting?" This is my favourite part - He didn't answer at first. Instead, it says, "So I prayed to the God of heaven." My translation? "So he shot up a quick prayer before he answered him." Why would he do that? He needed wisdom, fast. He needed to know how to answer the king, what to say. I do that all day long - quick prayers to the God of heaven. I often need to know how to respond to the kids or to my husband or to a friend.
It goes on to explain how he explained what he needed to fix the walls of Jerusalem. The section ends with another wonderful verse, "And the king granted what I asked for the good hand of my God was upon me." I said to the kids, "God will give us what we need to fix our situations because His good hand is upon us." I've thought about that so many times - His good hand is upon me. He will give me the resources I need to "fix my walls".
After inspecting the walls he goes back to the people who were "to do the work". He gives them the grim news, "You see the trouble we are in, how Jerusalem lies in ruins with the gates burned. Come let us build the wall of Jerusalem , that we may no longer suffer derision. And I told them of the hand of God that had been upon me for good..." (2:17, 18). It's not just us! Nehemiah admitted that he was in trouble, too! He describes being "in ruins" and how the gates were burned down to the ground. It must have seemed so hopeless, but just like Jacob commends his sons to stop looking at one another, Nehemiah also tries to inspire them, reminding them of God's good hand.
It must have been a pretty good pep talk because the people responded, "Let us rise up and build." And here again is another fantastic verse, "So they strengthened their hands for the good work." Clearly, what they were about to do was going to take supernatural strength and it would be grunt work, no doubt, but it was going to be "good work".
That is one of the things the missionary going to Zambia said on Sunday night. At the new university they are starting they would be teaching the Africans how to work, to not be afraid of work - it is what man was created to do. Building the wall would be a "good work". Nehemiah didn't want these people to be afraid to work either.
Here's what the enemy does though - he sends discouragement almost immediately. Three bad guys came along and as soon as they heard what was going on, "they jeered at us and despised us and said, 'What is this thing that you are doing? Are you rebelling against the king?'" Nehemiah doesn't lose it on them or panic. It seems to me he responds very matter-of-factly, "The God of heaven will make us prosper, and we his servants will arise and build, but you have no portion or right or claim to Jerusalem." Love it. That's what I told the kids we must say back against the discouragement that is sent from the pit of hell itself, "You have no portion or right or claim to me or to what God is doing in our life." What a great response to discouragement or any attacks Satan may send our way which he is quite relentless at doing! He clearly hates us, hates what our family is about, hates our attempts at killing debt. But we will "rise and build". We will keep doing all we can do.
I'm still not sure that God is going to prosper me how I want to be prospered, i.e., being debt-free in my lifetime, but that doesn't mean I won't be prosperous. I see myself being prosperous just by the very fact I'm able to be at home, I have my kids around me, I'm in a home, there is food in the fridge. I always have to remember the definition of prosper is more a state of mind and heart than of my bank account.
Every single day we are challenged it seems in some way. For Nehemiah, it was Sanballat, Tobiah and Geshem. For me, it takes different forms or names. How Nehemiah ever came to be in the Bible is fascinating, but I'm so grateful this book is in there. I take such great encouragement from it. The Bible models a situation and how to handle it so clearly. Why do we struggle with what to do when a problem comes along? It's laid out in Scripture how to respond, what to say, what to do.....
Who will be my Sanballat, Tobiah or my Geshem today? The lesson I take from this portion of Scripture is clear: Satan has no portion, no right, no claim.
Amen to that.
ReplyDeleteScram Satan.....