We're now in the fourth day without the older children. They're all away at the worldview camp they go to every year, though this is the first time they are all away together. Nothing makes us happier that they are together. They all love it so much, too, and have mentioned already how it makes it so much better to be there at the same time.
Meanwhile, I'm cooking less, cleaning less, doing less laundry, less driving.....less everything! Those older ones demand a lot more than I realized!
And, while I'm on the topic of doing all sorts of work for my older kids, why is no one giving me an award for all the driving I did this summer?!!! Why? I ask you! This past Saturday marked the last day of all my driving to MarineLand. I honestly don't know how I did it except that I was being prayed for all the time. But I have to say, I really ended up loving it. My oldest son is by far one of the funniest people I know, so we had such a great time each day, laughing all the time. I'm sure I gained weight, too, because in addition to the gas he contributed each week, I made him take me out for coffee each time I picked him up. "Give me your money," I would snidely say and he would hand it over knowing he had NO choice. Ha ha ha. That's a great feeling when you have rich kids, spending their money. Loved that.
We marveled on that last drive in and back at what a wonderful summer it had been and how we had been so protected the whole summer. Not one accident. Not one delay. Going into Niagara in the summer is typically a nightmare. If you go too late in the day you will inevitably hit hours of traffic, but we didn't. His shift always started at just the right time to miss it all. I was also in awe of the fact I was kept safe and that the car didn't have a single issue for all the driving I did. Not to mention that we were somehow able to fill up the gas tank time and time again.
It also seemed to help the kids who were left at home to rise up and do more than usual. For the first few days of all the driving I would come back and nothing had been done. I would feel so frustrated. I thought to myself, I better make a list, something they can see so they'll know, not just guess, what they should be doing while I'm gone. So that's what I did. Each morning I would write a monster list of all that should be done such as laundry, dishes, feeding kids/animals, vacuuming, etc. To my amazement, it was usually all done by the time I came home. They had to become responsible kids and they did it!
To top it all off, my son got his performance review and he did great. They'll gladly hire him next summer where he hopes to work with the dolphins - yet another dream job.
RM and I had set some goals for the summer - pretty basic ones - get the puppies sold and clean up the farm by selling some of the broken down vehicles like our van, and get rid of the final bull. The bull was caught and slaughtered a couple of weeks ago. I now have, no joke, 500 lbs of beef in my freezer - 10 huge boxes of beef. That should last me a good long while. Meanwhile the other goals were accomplished last weekend in one fell swoop.
We had listed our old 12 passenger van for a very low price because it wasn't working. Who would buy it, we wondered. Amazingly, some guy who runs his own mechanics shop offered us a decent price - sold, just like that. A tow truck came in and picked it up.
While we were waiting for the tow truck to come, an older couple came to look at the final two puppies. They immediately picked one. While they were picking their puppy, an e-transfer came through for the last puppy! That was when the tow truck came and took the van....all within minutes of each other. Talk about accomplishing the goals in a short time frame. When things like that happen, it feels like God is smiling down on us. Those had been huge prayer requests for us. We were in awe. Now we just have half a million kittens to list.....
I'm sitting here with what feels like a Florida summer breeze off the ocean. It has been the hottest summer ever and we had no air conditioning, but I can honestly say I didn't need it once. I loved the heat so much. We had a constant breeze. I think a lot of people wondered how we did it, but we were thinking, "How did people use air conditioning?" If we went somewhere that had air my kids would say, "It's so cold in here!" I always feel healthier without the air, so I'm so grateful for where we live. I read we're going to have a very cold winter....I won't think about that just yet......I'm hanging on to the warm breezes for a little while longer.......
Wednesday, 29 August 2018
Wednesday, 22 August 2018
Weeds, Camp, Health and Homeschool
I have sore muscles. I'm probably the only person out there who has sore muscles because I'm weeding 6000 plants. Last week, not quite single handedly, my kids and I weeded nearly 3 acres of vines. This week the remaining 2 acres are left to go. Most people hire this kind of thing out, but not us. No. I'm the hired help.
There is something satisfying though about the whole thing. Even my kids don't mind so much. You see the plant covered in weeds and then with a little hoeing the plant is uncovered and it looks up at you and almost seems to thank you for clearing away a path for the roots that had been blocking its way to water. The rows seem to come alive.
I was given multiple options for the kids last week. All sorts of day camps and even evening youth camps, but we just couldn't swing it and get the vineyard weeded as well. Yet no one complained. The only thing I can think of is that we replaced it with meaningful work. Work, yes. No one seems to love work just for the sake of work, but if it is work with a purpose it seems to be more embraced.
The kids know this vineyard is not just for mom and dad. It is their vineyard, too. They know if they help keep it alive, they will benefit one day, too. They seem to have grasped this concept and are willing to contribute, especially the older ones. The 6 and 8 year old get in there, but not perhaps with the same vigor.
But there are blips in the road of course. I went in for what I thought was a routine checkup and now have a D & C ahead of me. Having never even had a cavity and now facing the word "surgery", I'm not particularly happy about this turn of events. But the doctor is erring on the side of safety due to my sister's run-in with cancer awhile ago. From what I've heard it is a straightforward a procedure and I'll be home within hours not noticing a thing. The results of the D & C could be another matter, but that's out of my hands for now. Why borrow worry from tomorrow?
This week my oldest is a leader at the worldview camp she starting attending 4 years ago. Her siblings will all follow suit next week. It has such an impact on her so long ago, I'm excited to see the impact on the other ones now. What I love so much is that her first day there she kept looking for her siblings! She knew they weren't coming until the following week, but she's just so used to seeing them all the time and being with them all the time that she really missed them! That made my heart sing.
These next two weeks will see me up early making schedules and chore packs for the younger ones for September. That is a dangerous thing to do as I did that last year and it was nearly impossible for me to follow through with all the driving I did this past year. However, I will do it again, pretending that life will be "normal" (whatever that is around here). Even if I don't achieve all that I write down, I do it anyway so that there is some kind of goal!
I will go in with my eyes more wide open this year. I think last year I went in thinking if I didn't achieve all that was on my list, I was a failure. This haunted me throughout the year and made me want to send them all away to someone else's homeschool where more work was getting done. I had to give myself many a pep talk that our life was school even if I wasn't getting all the academics done that I had hoped for. The kids were taking in all that was happening and we did more school in some ways than I had done in all my previous years of homeschooling. So every year is different. I just love being with my kids no matter what happens. It is so fun to watch them grow up.
I've become a "suburban mom" again. The kids love splash pads (I don't know why) and so because we don't have a pool I head over to the one in town a couple times a week. It is my goal every time to talk with another mom. I've used the kittens and puppies lately to start conversations, "Do you want kittens? We have lots? No? What about puppies? No? Ah, too bad...." and then we start talking about why I have so many animals to sell or give away. Super funny. They usually find out I have 8 kids, homeschool, live on a farm.....that's when the shaking heads start, but I love it. It leads to really interesting conversations.
Now the week is at the half-way point. I started writing this two days ago and got interrupted. It is funny how time flies. We did get some weeding done, but then the rain hit so that just helps the weeds grow! It's ok. It'll get done. Coffee's done......time to enjoy my giant mug of the day.....
There is something satisfying though about the whole thing. Even my kids don't mind so much. You see the plant covered in weeds and then with a little hoeing the plant is uncovered and it looks up at you and almost seems to thank you for clearing away a path for the roots that had been blocking its way to water. The rows seem to come alive.
I was given multiple options for the kids last week. All sorts of day camps and even evening youth camps, but we just couldn't swing it and get the vineyard weeded as well. Yet no one complained. The only thing I can think of is that we replaced it with meaningful work. Work, yes. No one seems to love work just for the sake of work, but if it is work with a purpose it seems to be more embraced.
The kids know this vineyard is not just for mom and dad. It is their vineyard, too. They know if they help keep it alive, they will benefit one day, too. They seem to have grasped this concept and are willing to contribute, especially the older ones. The 6 and 8 year old get in there, but not perhaps with the same vigor.
But there are blips in the road of course. I went in for what I thought was a routine checkup and now have a D & C ahead of me. Having never even had a cavity and now facing the word "surgery", I'm not particularly happy about this turn of events. But the doctor is erring on the side of safety due to my sister's run-in with cancer awhile ago. From what I've heard it is a straightforward a procedure and I'll be home within hours not noticing a thing. The results of the D & C could be another matter, but that's out of my hands for now. Why borrow worry from tomorrow?
This week my oldest is a leader at the worldview camp she starting attending 4 years ago. Her siblings will all follow suit next week. It has such an impact on her so long ago, I'm excited to see the impact on the other ones now. What I love so much is that her first day there she kept looking for her siblings! She knew they weren't coming until the following week, but she's just so used to seeing them all the time and being with them all the time that she really missed them! That made my heart sing.
These next two weeks will see me up early making schedules and chore packs for the younger ones for September. That is a dangerous thing to do as I did that last year and it was nearly impossible for me to follow through with all the driving I did this past year. However, I will do it again, pretending that life will be "normal" (whatever that is around here). Even if I don't achieve all that I write down, I do it anyway so that there is some kind of goal!
I will go in with my eyes more wide open this year. I think last year I went in thinking if I didn't achieve all that was on my list, I was a failure. This haunted me throughout the year and made me want to send them all away to someone else's homeschool where more work was getting done. I had to give myself many a pep talk that our life was school even if I wasn't getting all the academics done that I had hoped for. The kids were taking in all that was happening and we did more school in some ways than I had done in all my previous years of homeschooling. So every year is different. I just love being with my kids no matter what happens. It is so fun to watch them grow up.
I've become a "suburban mom" again. The kids love splash pads (I don't know why) and so because we don't have a pool I head over to the one in town a couple times a week. It is my goal every time to talk with another mom. I've used the kittens and puppies lately to start conversations, "Do you want kittens? We have lots? No? What about puppies? No? Ah, too bad...." and then we start talking about why I have so many animals to sell or give away. Super funny. They usually find out I have 8 kids, homeschool, live on a farm.....that's when the shaking heads start, but I love it. It leads to really interesting conversations.
Now the week is at the half-way point. I started writing this two days ago and got interrupted. It is funny how time flies. We did get some weeding done, but then the rain hit so that just helps the weeds grow! It's ok. It'll get done. Coffee's done......time to enjoy my giant mug of the day.....
Tuesday, 14 August 2018
People Mean More
The reunion has now come and gone. What a week it was. The big questions are, "Did everything on my list get done?" "Did I win?" The short answers are "no" and "no". Technically my "miracle" I was hoping for didn't happen, however, many more miracles did happen - inside me.
I think I had actually pictured a truck from a TV show showing up with 200 tradespeople, all at the ready, determined to finish everything that needed to be done in less than a week. Uh, that wasn't going to happen, but I was a dreamer. But then that meant I was basically expecting the same of my husband, the work of 200 tradespeople.
Soon after I wrote my mega-list of things I had hoped we could do, I then never looked at it again. I committed it to the Lord knowing if He wanted those things done, they would get done and if not, they weren't that important. That immediately released me of stress and anxiety.
I also had resolved myself to try to do whatever was on his list, no matter how strange or seemingly unimportant. Turns out most of what he wanted done was only stuff he could do, like move machines out of the way, hang up lights, etc., so that meant I was free to work on things indoors and around the house tidying. Whenever I started pushing him or wanted to remind him of what needed to be done, I tried to rein my tongue in. Even my son said to me, "He knows what needs to be done." So I simply surrendered over and over what I wanted to see accomplished and really just tried to enjoy the week that he was around and actually enjoy my life and kids. The phrase that kept coming into my head was "the tyranny of the urgent". That is a phrase from Ann Voskamp describing how we can get ourselves in such a tizzy over what seems "urgent" and then it becomes the "tyranny of the urgent". I've done that before and I didn't want to do it again.
I think my turning point was night one of the reunion. It was just a "meet and greet" as everyone was flying in that night from all over the country. I didn't have to go, but being the ever social being that I am, I wanted to go. That always amazes RM. He had an "out" - my son needed to be picked up from work, so he "sacrificed" and stayed back. I was sooooo glad I went.
Within a few minutes of being there I was put on "driver duty" and was asked to go pick up some of RM's aunts, uncles and cousins who hadn't rented cars and needed to be picked up at a restaurant. RM's 92 year old aunt sat in the front seat with me and those were the most precious few minutes that changed everything for me. She is the spunkiest, most alert, young-looking lady. I can only hope I look and act like she does when I am 92! She asked about all my kids (remembered them!) and wanted to know all that we were up to. I loved being with her. But, it occurred to me, even though she is healthy and doing well today, you don't know if she'll be gone tomorrow.
I left having chatted with all of his cousins, aunts and uncles and went home with a sense of urgency. RM hadn't really planned on being at every event. He was happy to host the one on Saturday at our house, but the rest of the time he hadn't scheduled into his week. I convinced him he had to take time away from all the prep that was left to do and put it aside in the name of being with his 92 year old aunt and his 88 year old uncle. He gladly came the next day and soaked up the time with them. The house could wait. All the preparations could be put on hold. Everything was suddenly put into perspective. Relationships matter. People matter. 92 year old aunts matter. Stuff does not matter. I was so glad he came. And he ended up going to every single event that they offered that weekend!
There is a spiritual heritage in their family and I learned more about it from his 92 year old aunt. She had gotten baptized by the local pastor against her husband's wishes. He was so mad he locked her out of the house! I think he eventually came around, but she sounded like a brave woman. She had 12 children, 10 of whom lived. Each morning she would do her chores and then she would come in, make her coffee and go into the "good" room that was meant just for special occasions. There she would read and pray for an hour. Sounds kind of like Susanna Wesley! She was NOT to be disturbed. "That was where she found her strength," his aunt told me. She also remembered sitting around her mother's feet where she read them Bible stories each day. These are all the things I needed to hear. The godly heritage has been passed down unknowingly even into my children. His aunt continued, "I don't know why I've been given more time. Perhaps it is just to pray." "Yes!" I told her. "That's exactly why!"
Meanwhile his 88 year old uncle was looking for my husband. I wasn't sure why he would want to talk with him, but then he reminded me that RM had helped build houses with him when they were both younger. He wanted to talk to him about that. That's when it occurred to me - I was standing by an uncle that had built into my husband's life and had helped make him the man he is today. He had learned so many skills because of the willingness of these older uncles to allow him to work with them. RM ended up building his parents' house, their cottage, and also worked on his uncle's houses. Those construction skills allowed him to build a house for us and multiple projects over the years. I thanked him so much for being such a great uncle. He was shocked and had no idea the impact he had had on his nephew's life. Another great moment in the weekend.
There were easily over 70 people to spend time with all weekend. My kids kept looking around and saying, "So we're related to EVERYONE here??" "Yup. They are ALL your cousins, aunts and uncles." They couldn't believe it and had the best time making new friends and relationships with everyone.
The day of our event was a pig roast. People were supposed to arrive around 4:30. Right up until the minute before people came we were still doing last minute stuff. We probably spent way more than we should have as we purchased beautiful "Edison" lights for the front of the house, hung between trees, and tiki torches lining the driveway and around the edge of the property, not to mention a boatload of fireworks, but it looked so beautiful and the when the sun went down and everything was lit up, I can only say it looked "magical". My husband and I walked around and just felt so happy all night as we saw everyone enjoying themselves. It was really wonderful. I was sad when everyone left and it was all over. It was just such a nice time. I would really be quite happy to do something like that every weekend!
I still have a list of things we need to finish in our house and perhaps one day they will get done or perhaps not! But I'm so glad we didn't sacrifice the relationships with all his family for the sake of a "perfect" house. I'm so glad we figured out that people mean more than "stuff".
I think I had actually pictured a truck from a TV show showing up with 200 tradespeople, all at the ready, determined to finish everything that needed to be done in less than a week. Uh, that wasn't going to happen, but I was a dreamer. But then that meant I was basically expecting the same of my husband, the work of 200 tradespeople.
Soon after I wrote my mega-list of things I had hoped we could do, I then never looked at it again. I committed it to the Lord knowing if He wanted those things done, they would get done and if not, they weren't that important. That immediately released me of stress and anxiety.
I also had resolved myself to try to do whatever was on his list, no matter how strange or seemingly unimportant. Turns out most of what he wanted done was only stuff he could do, like move machines out of the way, hang up lights, etc., so that meant I was free to work on things indoors and around the house tidying. Whenever I started pushing him or wanted to remind him of what needed to be done, I tried to rein my tongue in. Even my son said to me, "He knows what needs to be done." So I simply surrendered over and over what I wanted to see accomplished and really just tried to enjoy the week that he was around and actually enjoy my life and kids. The phrase that kept coming into my head was "the tyranny of the urgent". That is a phrase from Ann Voskamp describing how we can get ourselves in such a tizzy over what seems "urgent" and then it becomes the "tyranny of the urgent". I've done that before and I didn't want to do it again.
I think my turning point was night one of the reunion. It was just a "meet and greet" as everyone was flying in that night from all over the country. I didn't have to go, but being the ever social being that I am, I wanted to go. That always amazes RM. He had an "out" - my son needed to be picked up from work, so he "sacrificed" and stayed back. I was sooooo glad I went.
Within a few minutes of being there I was put on "driver duty" and was asked to go pick up some of RM's aunts, uncles and cousins who hadn't rented cars and needed to be picked up at a restaurant. RM's 92 year old aunt sat in the front seat with me and those were the most precious few minutes that changed everything for me. She is the spunkiest, most alert, young-looking lady. I can only hope I look and act like she does when I am 92! She asked about all my kids (remembered them!) and wanted to know all that we were up to. I loved being with her. But, it occurred to me, even though she is healthy and doing well today, you don't know if she'll be gone tomorrow.
I left having chatted with all of his cousins, aunts and uncles and went home with a sense of urgency. RM hadn't really planned on being at every event. He was happy to host the one on Saturday at our house, but the rest of the time he hadn't scheduled into his week. I convinced him he had to take time away from all the prep that was left to do and put it aside in the name of being with his 92 year old aunt and his 88 year old uncle. He gladly came the next day and soaked up the time with them. The house could wait. All the preparations could be put on hold. Everything was suddenly put into perspective. Relationships matter. People matter. 92 year old aunts matter. Stuff does not matter. I was so glad he came. And he ended up going to every single event that they offered that weekend!
There is a spiritual heritage in their family and I learned more about it from his 92 year old aunt. She had gotten baptized by the local pastor against her husband's wishes. He was so mad he locked her out of the house! I think he eventually came around, but she sounded like a brave woman. She had 12 children, 10 of whom lived. Each morning she would do her chores and then she would come in, make her coffee and go into the "good" room that was meant just for special occasions. There she would read and pray for an hour. Sounds kind of like Susanna Wesley! She was NOT to be disturbed. "That was where she found her strength," his aunt told me. She also remembered sitting around her mother's feet where she read them Bible stories each day. These are all the things I needed to hear. The godly heritage has been passed down unknowingly even into my children. His aunt continued, "I don't know why I've been given more time. Perhaps it is just to pray." "Yes!" I told her. "That's exactly why!"
Meanwhile his 88 year old uncle was looking for my husband. I wasn't sure why he would want to talk with him, but then he reminded me that RM had helped build houses with him when they were both younger. He wanted to talk to him about that. That's when it occurred to me - I was standing by an uncle that had built into my husband's life and had helped make him the man he is today. He had learned so many skills because of the willingness of these older uncles to allow him to work with them. RM ended up building his parents' house, their cottage, and also worked on his uncle's houses. Those construction skills allowed him to build a house for us and multiple projects over the years. I thanked him so much for being such a great uncle. He was shocked and had no idea the impact he had had on his nephew's life. Another great moment in the weekend.
There were easily over 70 people to spend time with all weekend. My kids kept looking around and saying, "So we're related to EVERYONE here??" "Yup. They are ALL your cousins, aunts and uncles." They couldn't believe it and had the best time making new friends and relationships with everyone.
The day of our event was a pig roast. People were supposed to arrive around 4:30. Right up until the minute before people came we were still doing last minute stuff. We probably spent way more than we should have as we purchased beautiful "Edison" lights for the front of the house, hung between trees, and tiki torches lining the driveway and around the edge of the property, not to mention a boatload of fireworks, but it looked so beautiful and the when the sun went down and everything was lit up, I can only say it looked "magical". My husband and I walked around and just felt so happy all night as we saw everyone enjoying themselves. It was really wonderful. I was sad when everyone left and it was all over. It was just such a nice time. I would really be quite happy to do something like that every weekend!
I still have a list of things we need to finish in our house and perhaps one day they will get done or perhaps not! But I'm so glad we didn't sacrifice the relationships with all his family for the sake of a "perfect" house. I'm so glad we figured out that people mean more than "stuff".
Friday, 3 August 2018
The List Experiment
I'm doing a little experiment. I'm not very good about being selfless. I'm much better at worrying about me. So, for a change, even though I wrote my list and I even emailed it to him, I'm going to work on his list instead. This is my attempt at being less selfish.
His list is very strange. He wants us (the kids and me) to do things like pluck weeds in front of the garage. Why? No one is even going to notice that! I don't notice it! But he wants to put down more gravel, tidy up the driveway space and make more distinct edges. I actually get it a little, but it just isn't a priority for me. Isn't that what weed killer is for? Nope, guess not.
So he showed me how to do it with a huge tool that looks something like a pick ax. I have to use this to break up the root system which is deeply embedded in the gravel already and then once the roots are up, grab each plant or piece of sod and throw it in the wheel barrow. This is no easy job. My abs are feeling it today. The kids stuck it out for a few minutes, but then I was pretty much on my own. But, I have to say, it does look better! I was still going at it when my husband came home from picking up my son at 9:30 pm. I wasn't really do it for show at that point, but I think he appreciated me more! Ha! Maybe I'll have it done sooner than I thought....so that's my first attempt on his list.
Today is Day 2. The first words out of my mouth this morning were, "Do you want me to take the dog to the airport for you?" I didn't mean to say it, it just kind of came out. We are shipping the second dog of the litter to the airport to go across Canada to the east coast. This is no big deal, except I'm going to a new part of the airport just for cargo. I am comfortable with all things I have always done, not new things. I just found this out about myself recently. It creates a feeling of stress in me. He knows this so he doesn't normally make me do those things anymore, but lately, I've discovered it is another sign of selfishness in me. "Oh! It's new! I can't do it! I'm scared" said in wimpy me voice. So he takes time out of his day (which he never has enough of) and ends up going and doing all these things for me that are considered "hard" for me. Well, no more. Lately, I've been doing so many new things, I can't stand it! But, I know it's good for me. I can't be a wimp anymore. Each time I do the new thing, I realize I was afraid of nothing all along. So it's been a good lesson for me and my kids.
So, off I go to the airport today instead of him. It'll save him 3 or more hours in his day and it'll be nothing for me. I will pluck weeds that to me don't seem important, but they are to him.
Finally, I had put on my list that I wanted him to fix my cupboards in the kitchen and bathroom that had fallen off due to so much water damage. Nope. He couldn't and wouldn't. It was too big a fix and required more of an effort than he could give. He wants to focus on the big things, not the little ones. They'll "twenty minute" his time off to death. Then it occurred to me. I'll make fabric curtains to cover everything up. Perfect. So I googled it, youtubed it, pinterested it and saw tons of ideas. So I'm off to FabricLand and I'm going to be a capable woman/fixer upper doing that today, too!
I wonder what will be next on my list of things to do! I'll probably be fixing cars next....I bet I could do it now.
His list is very strange. He wants us (the kids and me) to do things like pluck weeds in front of the garage. Why? No one is even going to notice that! I don't notice it! But he wants to put down more gravel, tidy up the driveway space and make more distinct edges. I actually get it a little, but it just isn't a priority for me. Isn't that what weed killer is for? Nope, guess not.
So he showed me how to do it with a huge tool that looks something like a pick ax. I have to use this to break up the root system which is deeply embedded in the gravel already and then once the roots are up, grab each plant or piece of sod and throw it in the wheel barrow. This is no easy job. My abs are feeling it today. The kids stuck it out for a few minutes, but then I was pretty much on my own. But, I have to say, it does look better! I was still going at it when my husband came home from picking up my son at 9:30 pm. I wasn't really do it for show at that point, but I think he appreciated me more! Ha! Maybe I'll have it done sooner than I thought....so that's my first attempt on his list.
Today is Day 2. The first words out of my mouth this morning were, "Do you want me to take the dog to the airport for you?" I didn't mean to say it, it just kind of came out. We are shipping the second dog of the litter to the airport to go across Canada to the east coast. This is no big deal, except I'm going to a new part of the airport just for cargo. I am comfortable with all things I have always done, not new things. I just found this out about myself recently. It creates a feeling of stress in me. He knows this so he doesn't normally make me do those things anymore, but lately, I've discovered it is another sign of selfishness in me. "Oh! It's new! I can't do it! I'm scared" said in wimpy me voice. So he takes time out of his day (which he never has enough of) and ends up going and doing all these things for me that are considered "hard" for me. Well, no more. Lately, I've been doing so many new things, I can't stand it! But, I know it's good for me. I can't be a wimp anymore. Each time I do the new thing, I realize I was afraid of nothing all along. So it's been a good lesson for me and my kids.
So, off I go to the airport today instead of him. It'll save him 3 or more hours in his day and it'll be nothing for me. I will pluck weeds that to me don't seem important, but they are to him.
Finally, I had put on my list that I wanted him to fix my cupboards in the kitchen and bathroom that had fallen off due to so much water damage. Nope. He couldn't and wouldn't. It was too big a fix and required more of an effort than he could give. He wants to focus on the big things, not the little ones. They'll "twenty minute" his time off to death. Then it occurred to me. I'll make fabric curtains to cover everything up. Perfect. So I googled it, youtubed it, pinterested it and saw tons of ideas. So I'm off to FabricLand and I'm going to be a capable woman/fixer upper doing that today, too!
I wonder what will be next on my list of things to do! I'll probably be fixing cars next....I bet I could do it now.
Thursday, 2 August 2018
Kittens, Chickens and List Competitions (say that 3x fast)
Each summer brings a literal onslaught of kittens and I'm not even exaggerating. Now, some may question why we don't spay our cats. There are a couple of reasons. First, Murphy's Law says as soon as you do that, they'll get hit by a car. Also, all our cats eventually go missing. We don't even know where they go, they just disappear. It is also very expensive. AND, we love kittens. This is perhaps the main reason we don't spay. We actually love the onslaught. Most of the time. We have never had any difficulty getting people to take them. People come from as far as Toronto every time and nearly go loopy when they pick up their new adorable city cat, raised in a barn, by 8 kids.
Each summer also brings a funny kitten story or two. This last "cat delivery" time we were waiting on two cats to have their kittens, around the same time. The mommies have learned to not have them where the dog can get them as that led to disastrous results a couple of litters ago. So now they deliver in the loft of the house or the barn loft. The first cat delivered 4 kittens and all went well. The second cat delivered, but we had no idea where. We looked and looked and figured she had lost them to a rodent or in all the hay loading. We would follow her everywhere and she would never go to a litter of kittens. So sad. But then, one day I looked at her stomach and realized there was clear evidence that she was still nursing as she should have been back to normal. So then I realized there were still kittens out there somewhere! We looked again and finally had to follow her, in a private detective-kind-of way.....My daughter noticed she went way up in the very top of the barn in the most dangerous part where no human could go and sure enough, she heard little "mews". Aha! Found them!
Each summer also brings a funny kitten story or two. This last "cat delivery" time we were waiting on two cats to have their kittens, around the same time. The mommies have learned to not have them where the dog can get them as that led to disastrous results a couple of litters ago. So now they deliver in the loft of the house or the barn loft. The first cat delivered 4 kittens and all went well. The second cat delivered, but we had no idea where. We looked and looked and figured she had lost them to a rodent or in all the hay loading. We would follow her everywhere and she would never go to a litter of kittens. So sad. But then, one day I looked at her stomach and realized there was clear evidence that she was still nursing as she should have been back to normal. So then I realized there were still kittens out there somewhere! We looked again and finally had to follow her, in a private detective-kind-of way.....My daughter noticed she went way up in the very top of the barn in the most dangerous part where no human could go and sure enough, she heard little "mews". Aha! Found them!
We waited it out. Then, this week the puppies went in the barn for a few minutes while my son cleaned out their kennel and that was when they came upon them, at least one of the kittens. It was nearly mauled to death with puppy slobber. My 8 year old son had to rescue the poor kitten from the 5 puppies! When we showed it to the mom cat, she wouldn't go near it. It didn't smell or look like her kitten anymore. So we gave it to the other mom cat and just like last time, she took it into her brood and adopted it. Then, yesterday, my same son went back into the barn and found 3 more. Same thing, we showed them to the mom and for some reason she wanted nothing to do with them, so we gave them to her sister cat and she also took them in! Now she has 8 kittens! I laughed. She must be tired! I can relate. My kids are thrilled to have so many kittens. Even my 6 year old says, "Mom, this is cat therapy!" when he holds them. It is true. There is something so adorable about a little kitten that makes all right with the world. The good news is there are more on the way! Another cat is about to deliver anytime.....
In other exciting farm news, we also have chicken issues. Always have. We seem to really stink at teaching hens where to lay eggs. Most normal birds lay eggs in their nesting boxes. Not ours. We called them rogue hens. They insist on leaving the coop to lay them somewhere else. WHAT IS THE POINT OF CHICKENS LAYING EGGS IF YOU HAVE TO GO ON AN EASTER EGG HUNT EVERY MORNING?! Unbelievably, I have to buy eggs sometimes because I just can't find them anymore! They are too good at their hiding places and I just can't afford the chicken private detective that would take! But then, what happens is even worse.....rotten eggs are probably all over the farm.
Last week, I smelled death in the house. I figured it was a dead rat because we've gone on a poison rampage and are trying to rid the farm of pestilence. I ignored it for a few days hoping it would disappear. Then I seriously hoped my husband would take off work to help me. No. He not so nicely said I had to find it. He had no time. I finally took a flashlight and went into the basement hunting for dead rats. No rats. Then my nose, which is hyper sensitive, sensed the exact location, but nothing dead was there.....until my eyes turned slightly to the left. I was in the basement staircase and to my left was a wall and aha, a window well (on the outside of the house). That's when I saw it.....who knows how many eggs were there, but it was packed with eggs, all piled on top of one another. Some cracked open, just oozing with the worse smell ever...seeping through the cracks in the window well into the house. To be sure that was the smell, I took a huge sniff and nearly passed out. Yup, that was the smell. This is where 11 year old boys come in handy. I gave him the AWFUL job of cleaning out the window well. He was such a trooper, nearly passed out also, but did it. What a great kid!
The next day or two we discovered another batch - across the road in a ditch! I tell you, how was I supposed to know where they were laying them that time?! Points for creative laying spots, that's all I have to say.
Finding the kittens and finding the rotten death smell have been two great highlights of my week! Just had to share!
Today marks the official countdown to the reunion. I was being really good about not bugging my husband about my secret list of things I wished he would do. Finally, last night, I broke and asked if we could talk about all the things I was hoping for. He was willing to listen. No surprise, the things on my list were not on his list. Ha! He has completely other priorities, but as he left this morning he said, "Make a list!" I said to him, "Will you be my slave this week?" "Make a list!' was his answer. Hmmmm...He's also making a list. So I shouted out to the car as he was about to drive away, "May the best list win!" So now we're having a list competition......I hope I win.
Monday, 30 July 2018
I Don't Want to be Called "Fool"
We were at a funeral this past week for the father of one of my friend's. I made sure my oldest son was there as well as this man had become a mentor to him in his beekeeping. This older man was a master beekeeper and had taught my son all that he could in the few short years we knew him. He had also given him the skill of making candles from the bees' wax. One year he (my son) took over candle making at a children's camp for this older gentlemen, the week his wife passed away, and even that now seems like such a privilege my son was given.
You never know the time you have with someone could suddenly be cut short. So we are grateful to have known him. We discovered what a true servant this man was and how he had touched so many people through all the areas he served without ever seeking attention. He had a Ph.D., but most people never knew that they should be calling him "Doctor". Instead, most people could find him serving coffee at church or eating one of the pies he made for fundraisers or even eating his homemade bread. Truly a humble man, so glad we had the chance to meet him.
We are now kicking it into high gear for a family reunion event that we are hosting in less than a couple of weeks. I've vowed to keep my mouth shut and try not to nag my husband about all the things I wish we could have done in time for the day. Ha, I even had one of my daughters pray for me that I would be quiet and stop "reminding" him of my never-ending list. As opposed to this man I just wrote about, I am not quite as humble. Not getting all the things done on my list, however, will humble me. Instead of seeing a completely renovated house, they will see a house with no flooring, no trim, no walls, no paint. Instead of a perfectly landscaped house, they will instead be navigating awkward stairs (or no stairs in some cases) and uneven terrain. But, I've truly tried to let it go. The whole point of a family reunion is to spend time with family, to reconnect, to meet new family members that we've never ever known. My own kids don't even know who these people are! I can still hope for a miracle, but if no miracle comes, I will be fine with the house as is. I know one day it will be a little more completed! Maybe it will never even be completely done! That is fine, too.
One of the things that keeps us from finishing everything is that we do it all ourselves. That, of course, saves us a ton of money, but it also puts a lot of pressure on my husband who is not around much anymore. And, there is this new distraction out my kitchen window, called "The Vineyard". He's kind of preoccupied with it because if he loses the plants in this early stage it will be a huge loss, so I get it (the plants are actually doing great thanks to the big rain we got last week!). But, even if we had him home full-time, there just isn't the extra money, in addition to the time, to fix everything up. One area I had really hoped to spruce up was the front entry way. I'm not even really sure what I had hoped to do there, but I knew it was where most of us would be hanging out eating (it'll be a pig roast/bbq).
On the day I had asked my daughter to pray, I felt like I had truly finally released my "list". That's when it hit me, I suddenly got all inspired and got my two boys to come with me into the barn. I found 3 old barrels and had them roll them out to me one at a time. They weren't in the best of shape, but I kind of liked the vintage/barn/dirty look! Then, just like when I decorated my other patio on the side of my house, I started to look around and more and more things jumped out at me. I started to arrange them at the front of the house and placed the barrels on either side of the cement patio and added more and more objects surrounding the barrels that I picked out of the barn like bushel baskets for fruit, wine crates, fruit presses, and barrel rings that had fallen off the barrels. Suddenly, I had a nice little arrangement at the front of the house that spruced it up and made it quaint and once again, for free. I kind of laughed at myself. I walked out all the kids one at a time and made them look at it and told them to tell me how great it looked. They did! Is it coincidence that it all came together on that day? I suppose. It could be. I'd like to think I was "Holy Spirit Inspired" and that it was a gift to me, a reminder that releasing my desires is always followed by blessing. Another person might not have seen that as a blessing, but to me it was huge! It made me love my little entryway!
But back to my big list and all the other things I wanted done in time for the reunion. I had been getting quite upset that my stuff wasn't getting done. Last week I read in Luke 12 about the "Rich Fool". Jesus had warned the crowd, "Take care and be on your guard against all covetousness, for ONE'S LIFE DOES NOT CONSIST IN THE ABUNDANCE OF HIS POSSESSIONS."
Then Jesus told the story of the rich man who literally renovated his property to fit more stuff. He thought to himself if he just renovated than he would be happy (my paraphrase!) Ironically, he lived on a farm and had crops just like we do! But God said to him (and this is where is stings), "Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be? So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God." Ouch.
Lots of phrases jumped out at me when I read that passage. First of all "take care". I really have to be care-FULL. Careful about my motivations. Why do I want more stuff? Why do I want my list truly done? For me? I think it is ok to be good stewards of our things and get things in order around the house, but I have to keep my heart in check. I also have to be "on guard". The enemy is always trying to woo me into believing "if I just have this or get that or finish this then I will be happy". It is a form of covetousness for sure, because my ideas probably came from some magazine or driving by someone's house. I don't even know half the time where my crazy thoughts come from! "ALL COVETOUSNESS". Hmmmm....all covetousness....I asked the kids what they thought that meant and my daughter said, "It's when you're jealous of what someone else has." Yup, that's pretty much it. I just want what I don't have and I saw someone else have what I want. So pathetic!!!
"One's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." What does my life consist of then? The souls around me, not my stuff. I'm supposed to be "rich toward God", not towards my temporal goods. I couldn't believe the wording, "and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?" The things I have prepared.....It was almost like the Bible said, "And the things you want prepared for the reunion, whose will they be? Will they matter? In the big picture? Really?" No.
Does this mean I don't want to prepare anymore or that I should just sit around and let my place fall apart? No. Does it mean I can't enjoy my new little entryway look? No, I still love it. Can I still get more done? Yes, I'm still going to prepare. I'm still going to make it look as good as I can within reason, but I am going to "be careful" and "be on guard" that I don't ignore the souls around me in the name of getting my place ready. I'm going to be more intentional about identifying the lies that come into my head that always lead to discontentment. It's always a heart issue isn't it? Everything is. So that was when I had the kids pray for me. I confessed out loud, all these things to the kids. That was when I had my daughter pray about not being a nagging wife. I told them what my struggle was. They don't seem to notice or mind the messy undone house. It actually helps me keep things in perspective. I need their eyes.
I don't want to be called "fool".
You never know the time you have with someone could suddenly be cut short. So we are grateful to have known him. We discovered what a true servant this man was and how he had touched so many people through all the areas he served without ever seeking attention. He had a Ph.D., but most people never knew that they should be calling him "Doctor". Instead, most people could find him serving coffee at church or eating one of the pies he made for fundraisers or even eating his homemade bread. Truly a humble man, so glad we had the chance to meet him.
We are now kicking it into high gear for a family reunion event that we are hosting in less than a couple of weeks. I've vowed to keep my mouth shut and try not to nag my husband about all the things I wish we could have done in time for the day. Ha, I even had one of my daughters pray for me that I would be quiet and stop "reminding" him of my never-ending list. As opposed to this man I just wrote about, I am not quite as humble. Not getting all the things done on my list, however, will humble me. Instead of seeing a completely renovated house, they will see a house with no flooring, no trim, no walls, no paint. Instead of a perfectly landscaped house, they will instead be navigating awkward stairs (or no stairs in some cases) and uneven terrain. But, I've truly tried to let it go. The whole point of a family reunion is to spend time with family, to reconnect, to meet new family members that we've never ever known. My own kids don't even know who these people are! I can still hope for a miracle, but if no miracle comes, I will be fine with the house as is. I know one day it will be a little more completed! Maybe it will never even be completely done! That is fine, too.
One of the things that keeps us from finishing everything is that we do it all ourselves. That, of course, saves us a ton of money, but it also puts a lot of pressure on my husband who is not around much anymore. And, there is this new distraction out my kitchen window, called "The Vineyard". He's kind of preoccupied with it because if he loses the plants in this early stage it will be a huge loss, so I get it (the plants are actually doing great thanks to the big rain we got last week!). But, even if we had him home full-time, there just isn't the extra money, in addition to the time, to fix everything up. One area I had really hoped to spruce up was the front entry way. I'm not even really sure what I had hoped to do there, but I knew it was where most of us would be hanging out eating (it'll be a pig roast/bbq).
On the day I had asked my daughter to pray, I felt like I had truly finally released my "list". That's when it hit me, I suddenly got all inspired and got my two boys to come with me into the barn. I found 3 old barrels and had them roll them out to me one at a time. They weren't in the best of shape, but I kind of liked the vintage/barn/dirty look! Then, just like when I decorated my other patio on the side of my house, I started to look around and more and more things jumped out at me. I started to arrange them at the front of the house and placed the barrels on either side of the cement patio and added more and more objects surrounding the barrels that I picked out of the barn like bushel baskets for fruit, wine crates, fruit presses, and barrel rings that had fallen off the barrels. Suddenly, I had a nice little arrangement at the front of the house that spruced it up and made it quaint and once again, for free. I kind of laughed at myself. I walked out all the kids one at a time and made them look at it and told them to tell me how great it looked. They did! Is it coincidence that it all came together on that day? I suppose. It could be. I'd like to think I was "Holy Spirit Inspired" and that it was a gift to me, a reminder that releasing my desires is always followed by blessing. Another person might not have seen that as a blessing, but to me it was huge! It made me love my little entryway!
But back to my big list and all the other things I wanted done in time for the reunion. I had been getting quite upset that my stuff wasn't getting done. Last week I read in Luke 12 about the "Rich Fool". Jesus had warned the crowd, "Take care and be on your guard against all covetousness, for ONE'S LIFE DOES NOT CONSIST IN THE ABUNDANCE OF HIS POSSESSIONS."
Then Jesus told the story of the rich man who literally renovated his property to fit more stuff. He thought to himself if he just renovated than he would be happy (my paraphrase!) Ironically, he lived on a farm and had crops just like we do! But God said to him (and this is where is stings), "Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be? So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God." Ouch.
Lots of phrases jumped out at me when I read that passage. First of all "take care". I really have to be care-FULL. Careful about my motivations. Why do I want more stuff? Why do I want my list truly done? For me? I think it is ok to be good stewards of our things and get things in order around the house, but I have to keep my heart in check. I also have to be "on guard". The enemy is always trying to woo me into believing "if I just have this or get that or finish this then I will be happy". It is a form of covetousness for sure, because my ideas probably came from some magazine or driving by someone's house. I don't even know half the time where my crazy thoughts come from! "ALL COVETOUSNESS". Hmmmm....all covetousness....I asked the kids what they thought that meant and my daughter said, "It's when you're jealous of what someone else has." Yup, that's pretty much it. I just want what I don't have and I saw someone else have what I want. So pathetic!!!
"One's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." What does my life consist of then? The souls around me, not my stuff. I'm supposed to be "rich toward God", not towards my temporal goods. I couldn't believe the wording, "and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?" The things I have prepared.....It was almost like the Bible said, "And the things you want prepared for the reunion, whose will they be? Will they matter? In the big picture? Really?" No.
Does this mean I don't want to prepare anymore or that I should just sit around and let my place fall apart? No. Does it mean I can't enjoy my new little entryway look? No, I still love it. Can I still get more done? Yes, I'm still going to prepare. I'm still going to make it look as good as I can within reason, but I am going to "be careful" and "be on guard" that I don't ignore the souls around me in the name of getting my place ready. I'm going to be more intentional about identifying the lies that come into my head that always lead to discontentment. It's always a heart issue isn't it? Everything is. So that was when I had the kids pray for me. I confessed out loud, all these things to the kids. That was when I had my daughter pray about not being a nagging wife. I told them what my struggle was. They don't seem to notice or mind the messy undone house. It actually helps me keep things in perspective. I need their eyes.
I don't want to be called "fool".
Friday, 20 July 2018
Vines, Homeless Kids, and College
My husband is up early on his day off. Where is he? Watering the vines. But we are excited. The tiny little sticks that had no leaves on them are now growing little buds. It's hard to imagine that a little bud can get you so excited, but it does.
We have some neat mentors in this whole process, one of whom is our neighbour who grows around 30 acres across and down the road. She's a single mom/farmer who somehow does this all on her own. I admire her so much. She has taken a liking to us and shakes her head everytime we do something new and crazy. How can some city folk take on a huge project like a new vineyard? Yet we do, so instead of balking at our craziness, she offers her assistance. We actually caught her in the vineyard the other night checking out our soil and plants to see how they were doing, very funny.
But we've had some naysayers, too. One of our pruners heard my husband talk about the vineyard he was planning on planting. He immediately discouraged him. "Don't do it. Stick with your day job. Farming is hard work." My husband's response was, "I know it is hard work, but I still want to try." I'm very proud that he pushed back all the negativity and went ahead. This has made him come alive again as his day job is just that, his day job. We are so grateful for the work and the income, but it is not an easy environment to work in. His skill levels are not challenged the way he would like and that can leave him bored and prone to depression. But then he comes home and jumps on a tractor and voila - new person! So, I'm so grateful for the farm. He absolutely loves it. He said to me recently if he could go back and pick a different career he would have been a farmer. Wow.
The other thing he loves about farming in this day and age is that it's all precision farming. The vines were put in with a gps. Each vine has gps coordinates making them exactly parallel to the road. Being an engineer and studying this precision farming at the college, he loved it and appreciated it more than even maybe the old school farmers. Not the farming my great-grandparents did, yet it makes me appreciate what they did without all the high-tech gear.
So we had a funny change in our home yet again - two more homeless kids. My oldest son, 19, kicked out the two little boys out of his room. That was it. Enough was enough. There they were just like they were the last time, a couple of years ago, when my oldest daughter said the same thing, "Enough is enough. I need my own space." So, for the second time in a row, they had to pack all their belongings and move into the hallway with a pillow in one hand, a blanket in the other, and all their worldly possessions (i.e. bird nests, rock collections, fossils, etc.) on their backs. What was I to do with them? Last time we had them sleep on either side of our bed for a few months on the floor. But that was when they were little, now they were big. Wasn't an option.
My oldest son had been mentioning this for a while. But I just couldn't think of anything. I couldn't just build an addition. I couldn't put them in the hall. But I knew he truly needed the study space. I could see that his mental health was at stake as he was truly feeling overwhelmed by all their stuff, the noise, the fact he had no place to put all his textbooks. He had been a real champ at sharing a room with these little guys for so long. How many 19 year old young men say that they share a room with a 6 and 8 year old brother? I actually think it has created a special bond with the boys. But I could see he was starting to struggle as he has been planning all his courses for next year, needing a quiet place to go to, talking to academic advisors, etc. So when he came to me, I was weeding my (pathetic) garden (that's another story). But this time, I didn't dismiss him, I prayed. I stood on my hoe, closed my eyes and said, "Lord, what can I do? What do you want me to do? Is there a way to help my overwhelmed son? Is there a way to give him his own space and still give my little boys a place to sleep and play?" And then, suddenly, it came to me. The loft. I can move them all to the loft. My other son, 17, is up there with my 11 year old. But if I move the 17 year old into the 19 year old's room, I can then move the two little boys up to the loft with the 11 year old. They are small enough for all 3 boys to fit up there. The only reason we hadn't done that before was because they were too young to navigate the stairs in the middle of the night. I was always so afraid they would fall down the spiral staircase to their death! But they aren't babies anymore, they are 6 and 8!
I told the 19 year old and he loved it. He got the 17 year old and within minutes they had dismantled the whole bunkbed that had been taking up all the space. He spent the rest of the day cleaning the room and getting rid of all the boys stuff (into the hallway!) and just like that they were homeless.
I then approached the homeless children and told them my idea of moving them to the loft. They loved it! They took their belongings in 2 whole trips and moved in within minutes. The 11 year old was not as excited to sleep with these little rascals. He now sleeps on a couch! We just don't have enough beds or space! But who cares, it's working for now. I'm working my hardest on getting my older ones to eventually move out, so it is a short-term solution. The 17 year old also still sleeps on a different couch because we don't have a single bed for him yet, but again, short term and he doesn't mind. So my house is one funny place.
Last night my 6 year old told me, "You are ALMOST the best mom in the world!" "Almost?!" I said with raised eyebrows. "Ok, no, you are the BEST mom in the world!" What had I done to deserve the "Almost Best Mom" award? I took them fishing. I cannot believe that I did not know there was a fishing lake 20 minutes from my house. I only found out last night at 6:30 pm from a gas station attendant while we were getting gas and worms. I asked him if he knew of any good fishing places near here and he told me of a conservation area nearby. We had been planning on going somewhere else. This place was closer and way bigger (though it required a small fee). My kids nearly lost their minds with excitement. I actually did, too! It was so beautiful and so quiet, no one around, but tons of little fish. They caught somewhere close to 15 fish! They had to release them all, but it didn't matter, they had so much fun. So that is why I'm the "Almost Best Mom". I felt like it was a gift from God to find out about this place. Now, I'm thinking season's pass.....
One other funny change. Our 17 and 14 year old son and daughter still have some school to finish from this past year. They quit school a little early in May to go work at a greenhouse. They made good money, but didn't get all their school work done. We tried to work in the evening, but this didn't always happen. Then the greenhouse stopped needing them so much, so we took advantage of this slow time. I, again, was praying how to best guide them, how to best get them to get their work done, how to do everything best! This time, the genius idea came to my husband. He decided he would take them to work at the college! Perfect! They could work together in the library and literally be there working the same amount of time he was at work. That way there would be no problem getting their work done. At first they weren't too excited, but after we explained the logic of concentrated time, no distractions by these younger 4 running around, they bought into it and started to amazingly get excited. It's been only 2 days, but they are getting more done than they ever did here. That's another huge benefit of working at the college. When he was taken away from the home full-time a couple of years ago, I was so sad. He had less time with the kids, less time monitoring their lives, less time to disciple them. We started to see the impact, but now, we're seeing the college as such a blessing with these older ones. If he can't be at home with the kids, take the kids with him! "There's more than one way to skin a cat," he said. He gets to meet with them for breakfast, coffee, breaks, lunch.....he drives with them the 30 minutes, talking the whole way there and back about what they plan on accomplishing and then talks with them to whole way home to see what they got done. I love it. Another HUGE answer to prayer for me.
Today we water vines, pick up 250 bales of hay, pick up a new tractor (well, new to us) to go between the vines (our other one was too big) and maybe even go fishing again....always trying to be the "Almost Best Mom" ever.......
We have some neat mentors in this whole process, one of whom is our neighbour who grows around 30 acres across and down the road. She's a single mom/farmer who somehow does this all on her own. I admire her so much. She has taken a liking to us and shakes her head everytime we do something new and crazy. How can some city folk take on a huge project like a new vineyard? Yet we do, so instead of balking at our craziness, she offers her assistance. We actually caught her in the vineyard the other night checking out our soil and plants to see how they were doing, very funny.
But we've had some naysayers, too. One of our pruners heard my husband talk about the vineyard he was planning on planting. He immediately discouraged him. "Don't do it. Stick with your day job. Farming is hard work." My husband's response was, "I know it is hard work, but I still want to try." I'm very proud that he pushed back all the negativity and went ahead. This has made him come alive again as his day job is just that, his day job. We are so grateful for the work and the income, but it is not an easy environment to work in. His skill levels are not challenged the way he would like and that can leave him bored and prone to depression. But then he comes home and jumps on a tractor and voila - new person! So, I'm so grateful for the farm. He absolutely loves it. He said to me recently if he could go back and pick a different career he would have been a farmer. Wow.
The other thing he loves about farming in this day and age is that it's all precision farming. The vines were put in with a gps. Each vine has gps coordinates making them exactly parallel to the road. Being an engineer and studying this precision farming at the college, he loved it and appreciated it more than even maybe the old school farmers. Not the farming my great-grandparents did, yet it makes me appreciate what they did without all the high-tech gear.
So we had a funny change in our home yet again - two more homeless kids. My oldest son, 19, kicked out the two little boys out of his room. That was it. Enough was enough. There they were just like they were the last time, a couple of years ago, when my oldest daughter said the same thing, "Enough is enough. I need my own space." So, for the second time in a row, they had to pack all their belongings and move into the hallway with a pillow in one hand, a blanket in the other, and all their worldly possessions (i.e. bird nests, rock collections, fossils, etc.) on their backs. What was I to do with them? Last time we had them sleep on either side of our bed for a few months on the floor. But that was when they were little, now they were big. Wasn't an option.
My oldest son had been mentioning this for a while. But I just couldn't think of anything. I couldn't just build an addition. I couldn't put them in the hall. But I knew he truly needed the study space. I could see that his mental health was at stake as he was truly feeling overwhelmed by all their stuff, the noise, the fact he had no place to put all his textbooks. He had been a real champ at sharing a room with these little guys for so long. How many 19 year old young men say that they share a room with a 6 and 8 year old brother? I actually think it has created a special bond with the boys. But I could see he was starting to struggle as he has been planning all his courses for next year, needing a quiet place to go to, talking to academic advisors, etc. So when he came to me, I was weeding my (pathetic) garden (that's another story). But this time, I didn't dismiss him, I prayed. I stood on my hoe, closed my eyes and said, "Lord, what can I do? What do you want me to do? Is there a way to help my overwhelmed son? Is there a way to give him his own space and still give my little boys a place to sleep and play?" And then, suddenly, it came to me. The loft. I can move them all to the loft. My other son, 17, is up there with my 11 year old. But if I move the 17 year old into the 19 year old's room, I can then move the two little boys up to the loft with the 11 year old. They are small enough for all 3 boys to fit up there. The only reason we hadn't done that before was because they were too young to navigate the stairs in the middle of the night. I was always so afraid they would fall down the spiral staircase to their death! But they aren't babies anymore, they are 6 and 8!
I told the 19 year old and he loved it. He got the 17 year old and within minutes they had dismantled the whole bunkbed that had been taking up all the space. He spent the rest of the day cleaning the room and getting rid of all the boys stuff (into the hallway!) and just like that they were homeless.
I then approached the homeless children and told them my idea of moving them to the loft. They loved it! They took their belongings in 2 whole trips and moved in within minutes. The 11 year old was not as excited to sleep with these little rascals. He now sleeps on a couch! We just don't have enough beds or space! But who cares, it's working for now. I'm working my hardest on getting my older ones to eventually move out, so it is a short-term solution. The 17 year old also still sleeps on a different couch because we don't have a single bed for him yet, but again, short term and he doesn't mind. So my house is one funny place.
Last night my 6 year old told me, "You are ALMOST the best mom in the world!" "Almost?!" I said with raised eyebrows. "Ok, no, you are the BEST mom in the world!" What had I done to deserve the "Almost Best Mom" award? I took them fishing. I cannot believe that I did not know there was a fishing lake 20 minutes from my house. I only found out last night at 6:30 pm from a gas station attendant while we were getting gas and worms. I asked him if he knew of any good fishing places near here and he told me of a conservation area nearby. We had been planning on going somewhere else. This place was closer and way bigger (though it required a small fee). My kids nearly lost their minds with excitement. I actually did, too! It was so beautiful and so quiet, no one around, but tons of little fish. They caught somewhere close to 15 fish! They had to release them all, but it didn't matter, they had so much fun. So that is why I'm the "Almost Best Mom". I felt like it was a gift from God to find out about this place. Now, I'm thinking season's pass.....
One other funny change. Our 17 and 14 year old son and daughter still have some school to finish from this past year. They quit school a little early in May to go work at a greenhouse. They made good money, but didn't get all their school work done. We tried to work in the evening, but this didn't always happen. Then the greenhouse stopped needing them so much, so we took advantage of this slow time. I, again, was praying how to best guide them, how to best get them to get their work done, how to do everything best! This time, the genius idea came to my husband. He decided he would take them to work at the college! Perfect! They could work together in the library and literally be there working the same amount of time he was at work. That way there would be no problem getting their work done. At first they weren't too excited, but after we explained the logic of concentrated time, no distractions by these younger 4 running around, they bought into it and started to amazingly get excited. It's been only 2 days, but they are getting more done than they ever did here. That's another huge benefit of working at the college. When he was taken away from the home full-time a couple of years ago, I was so sad. He had less time with the kids, less time monitoring their lives, less time to disciple them. We started to see the impact, but now, we're seeing the college as such a blessing with these older ones. If he can't be at home with the kids, take the kids with him! "There's more than one way to skin a cat," he said. He gets to meet with them for breakfast, coffee, breaks, lunch.....he drives with them the 30 minutes, talking the whole way there and back about what they plan on accomplishing and then talks with them to whole way home to see what they got done. I love it. Another HUGE answer to prayer for me.
Today we water vines, pick up 250 bales of hay, pick up a new tractor (well, new to us) to go between the vines (our other one was too big) and maybe even go fishing again....always trying to be the "Almost Best Mom" ever.......
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