We've got a big birthday in our house. Our oldest is 16. That is a big number and back in my day it meant driving! She'll be going for the first part of the driving test today- the written test - yikes! It's really happening!
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We didn't buy Christmas presents, but we will do birthday presents, but this year, we won't go overboard in this area, we'll be keeping it on a small scale even though it is a big birthday and even though it is going against everything in me that wants to spend, spend, spend - partly because I love spending (true!), but really, because I want to bless her.
Our somewhat bigger, boring gift, but a necessity, will be driving lessons. That isn't free! But it is necessary if she is really going to be a driver and of course we want her to be and she wants to be. She'll take those in the spring with a few friends who are also turning 16 this year, so that'll be a fun way to do them - with friends.
I was happy to do the lessons, but I did want to do something a little more special, if you know what I mean. You can't wear driver's lessons on a finger or around your neck! But anything that I wanted to buy would have been so expensive! What was I going to do? Listen to this great story...
I really wanted to buy her a meaningful piece of jewellery. We did this when she turned 12 as well, as we also counted that as a very special year - the beginning of entering into young womanhood. To us, turning 16 is the final stage of childhood and really the beginning of the young adult years. I know that is not how the world sees it, but we do. Well, guess what happened to that necklace - lost at a friend's place! That's not why we aren't buying something more expensive this time, because she might lose it, but it does make me think twice about buying something costly! Anyway, off I went to our favourite store down the street.....you guessed it, the thrift store. Please don't think I'm cheap. I'm honestly trying to be wise, yet bless my child at the same time. Of course I was praying, for something to stand out at me, for a miracle of some kind. The demon of discouragement was climbing back up on my shoulder. First I looked in the clothing section - not much. She actually loves the clothes there. I don't know where they come from, but I swear the clothes are new. We find stuff with tags on all the time and name brand mostly. Nothing was jumping out at me.
Then I went to the little jewellery section.
Most of it is costume jewellery, and yes, a little tacky, but not all of it. They actually had some really beautiful necklaces that looked new. I actually had to call someone over to show them to me because believe it or not, they were behind glass (could they have real value?). Turns out they weren't even locked behind the glass! Oh well. I asked her to bring down a few anyway. Couldn't decide. One of them had a stone in it, but I couldn't remember what January's stone was. All of my sisters and I were given necklaces with our birthstones for our 40th birthdays from our parents. It was very special and is still one of my favourite necklaces today. So, with that idea in my mind and leaning towards that necklace, I called my son over and asked his opinion - which one do you like? Ah, I don't know, they are all ok. A boy, a brother, didn't seem to have an interest in jewellery, but then I asked him, if by chance if he knew what January's stone was as he does have an interest in that! He loves stones, jewels....studies them all the time and has a big collection! Oh sure! Suddenly he cared which necklace - garnet is January's stone! The one necklace that had a stone in it was a garnet! Coincidence? I told the lady immediately that I would take the one with the garnet stone - even the chain appears to be silver. The price tag does not indicate it is a real stone and perhaps it is not, but then, I won't be afraid if she loses it! I really love the necklace, I love the significance of it as it brings back the whole day she was born. It carries on the tradition my parents started and I didn't have to blow the bank, though I would have and I wanted to!
Then, as we were walking out, I did see a shirt that I knew she would love, so I did throw that in. As for other gifts, my boys are being super creative. One of them is giving her his Converse sneakers. She has wanted them since the day we found them in a different thrift store! He wouldn't share, no way. But being a growing teenage boy, unfortunately they don't fit! So, he's wrapping them up and giving them to her as a surprise - she will absolutely love that gift! My other son is giving her a can of sweetened condensed milk! Funny gift, but she has been off sugar for nearly a week and will be so excited to bake something with that!
As for other festivities, normally we definitely go out for dinner, but this year, we'll stay home and I'll make her favourite food. She's happy with that! She's actually going to spend most of the morning with her Dad running errands with him after she gets her learner's license. We have a couple of gift cards that could be used on lunches, etc., so she might just get a little restaurant in there which is also way cheaper if it is only two people, as opposed to 10! Later, my sister is hosting a family tea for her which will be super special! And, of top of all that, these wonderful friends who are all turning 16 this year will do something together as well once they all have their birthdays - maybe in the spring. So I think she's going to be celebrated really well!
Once again, I see the hand of the Lord on my life. He knows how I want to bless my children, yet how I want to be wise with our money. He gives me concrete examples of his love for me and for them.
The tests keep coming, for all of us - this was a big one for me, but God showed himself faithful.
I know this might be a bit of a stretch, but it is a great example to me of how God hears me. I've been reading through the Bible and am in Genesis. I read about Hagar and her son Ishmael. Sarah had just sent them away because she did not want the son of the slave woman to be heir with Isaac. Hagar put the child under a bush and left him there to die as there was no water left and she "lifted up her voice and wept". She did not want to "look on the death of the child". Is that not a little how I was feeling? I see my daughter's special birthday coming up, no money to spend, no "water" left! It is hardly a death of a child, but for me, a girl who grew up celebrating birthdays all day long, giving and getting gifts is huge - I didn't want to see her day, my dreams for her, just "die". But God heard Hagar and her son's cries. "And God heard the voice of the boy and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, "What troubles you Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the boy where he is. Up!.....Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. And she went and filled the skin with water and gave the boy a drink." Isn't it interesting? Hagar is concerned for her firstborn, too - on a different scale, mind you! God heard his cries and acted on the boy's behalf. He knew something was "troubling" Hagar and told her not to be afraid. I was troubled for sure, not crying, but troubled. I think God really does this even now. He hears our cries, our children's cries and he intervenes in big ways and in my case, a small way (though it was big to me!). He opened her eyes to water, and my eyes, to that little necklace. Because of my humanness, I think I would really jump off this debt bandwagon if I could right now, because it seems like it is in vain sometimes - I'd rather eat, drink and be merry! But then these little signs happen and it keeps me from jumping off, but rather, keeps me on. Maybe that little necklace will always be a sign to her and to me of how God answered our prayers this year.
The story ends so perfectly, "And God was with the boy, and he grew up." That's it! It's so simple. So my prayer for my daughter will be just that - that she will always know that God will hear her when she is troubled and that God will be with her as she grows up. He's done that for her mom, so he can do it for her. Amen!
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