Yesterday we found out two people in our lives, one we know very well and one not as well, have been diagnosed with (I can't even write it) the "C" word. They are both facing surgery and unknown futures. I had just read with the children that very morning about the sufferings of life, but as I talked with them and read from the Bible and the devotional, we discovered that only when we face obstacles can we sing. Just like with the wind. We only hear it when it hits a tree or some leaves, that's when we know it is there. That's when we hear the wind "sing".
Similarly, when a storm comes in the middle of a hot and humid summer day, suddenly the storm changes the atmosphere - it cleans it, purifies it, it brings new life....all because of the storm. I read all those things, not knowing a phone call was just about to come.
As we prayed last night for these people, my daughter knew just what to do and she thanked God for the disease. She thanked Him for how it was coming to possibly clean the atmosphere, to purify it and to bring new life. What a great perspective! The human side of us doesn't typically go there and I have to admit, I still have a nagging feeling in the back of my head as I don't know the future and part of me wants to be afraid, but I'm fighting that with all my heart.
I read about hearts yesterday. Now I'm in 1 Samuel and Saul had just been chosen as king over Israel, though no one knew it yet. He was innocently out looking for his donkeys when Samuel approached him. He told him how God had chosen him to be over all Israel. Saul was shocked and much like Gideon responded with, "Am I not a Benjaminite, from the least of the tribes of Israel? And is not my clan the humblest of all the clans of the tribe of Benjamin?" (9:21) But no, he was exactly who God had chosen. Samuel gave him signs to watch for as he must have known this was a big shock to Saul. Then, and here is one of the greatest phrases in the Bible, "When he turned his back to leave Samuel, God gave him another heart." (10:9) How great is that?!
Why did God give him another heart? I think it must have been that he was fearful as we see him only a few verses later "hidden among the baggage", just like Gideon. He probably couldn't believe what Saul was telling him, "Why me?" he was probably thinking. Israel had asked for a king and only a man that God had chosen could do it. Only a man with supernatural wisdom and power could lead Israel. No one in his right mind would have wanted to lead those people. God needed to give him another heart in order to believe he could do it and in order to even have the ability to follow God's commands.
I need another heart. Don't we all need another heart? I just love that phrase so much. These unwell people in my life probably need new hearts too, and maybe a few new other organs as well. No doubt they are afraid like Saul, "Why me? Why have you chosen me?" They will need a new heart to take on the task that lies before them. Only in God's power can they be in the fight they are now in.
I need a new heart as I take on this challenge once again of praying through the next 40 days. I still don't know how God is going to meet our needs, but He miraculously continues to take care of us. We sold one of the Porsches that RM had been working on for a long time. God's timing was perfect though. We sold it just when we needed the money most. Then I gave another seminar a couple of weeks ago and unlike the other seminars I'd been giving where only 4 or 5 showed up, this time 31 women came! It was amazing! I was so grateful. It was a definite help at just the right time...as usual. Then, another hay order came in that we weren't expecting. All unexpected sources of income. Only God can orchestrate all of that. Perhaps He is giving me a new heart as I haven't been experiencing the fear, the panic and the dread I used to once feel. Perhaps He is giving me that new heart, just not all at once.
Back to Saul.....As Saul was proclaimed king, there were some who got jealous and said, "How can this man save us?" And "they despised him and brought him no present." But, at the same time, others, "men of valour whose hearts God had touched" went with Saul. They believed in him because God had touched their hearts. The others who were jealous were called "worthless fellows". (10:26) God knew this fearful leader would need supporters, "men of valour" not "worthless fellows". In our fight against debt, against disease, we need people around us whose hearts God has touched to support us, not to question us and doubt our abilities. So far, thankfully, that has been our situation and I'm so grateful for that. I realized how much that makes those people in our lives people of valour! I need to be that for others, too.
Ironically, this weekend is Valentine's Day. The world only knows the chocolate and diamonds Valentine's Day. But, the Bible has a twist on V-Day, doesn't it? This is the type of Valentine's Day I'm talking about - getting a new heart, from God, not a chocolate one from a store. That's what I'm asking for.
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